You are My Muse

The Hard Way

“Hey, Gramps!” Leila greeted without thinking as she slid into the seat opposite Marie.

Marie raised an eyebrow. “Gramps?”

Jay shook his head. “You’re spending too much time with Junior.”

Marie smirked. “Spending too much time with who?”

“Oh, Jay, don’t feed her crazy mind,” Leila begged.

“I’m not feeding her anything. I’m just stating facts. Junior is the only person who calls me that.” Jay folded his arms, looking pleased with himself.

Leila groaned. “You’re killing me over here, Gramps!” she whispered dramatically.

Marie gasped. “Did you hear that, Jay? She called you Gramps again. They must be spending way too much time together.” She nodded knowingly.

“Can’t a girl respect an old man around here?” Leila tried.

Jay chuckled. “I’ll leave you girls to sort this out. Your coffees will be right up!” He walked away, still grinning.

Marie leaned in, folding her arms across her chest. “Sooo…” she began, her face serious.

Leila groaned. “It’s not what you think.” She attempted an innocent look.

Marie raised an eyebrow. “I’m not thinking anything… because I don’t know anything.”

Most people thought Leila was an oversharer because she talked so much, but Marie knew better. Leila had walls—thick, unyielding walls—built around her. She held everything in, the good and the bad, keeping it all locked inside. Marie loved her best friend dearly, and she just wished Leila would share more, release more. The more you let out, the more space you had to experience new things, to tell the difference between the good and the bad. But when you bottled everything up, it all blurred together—it became hard to differentiate, hard to truly be happy.

Marie wished she could drill this into Leila’s head. But, oh well. Everyone learned at their own pace.

In the meantime, she was going to force Leila to spill this beautiful new thing she had going on with Junior. And Leila was about to c***k—Marie could see it in her face.

Leila fidgeted, clearly struggling to spit it out, her cheeks turning pink. “Well…”

Marie leaned in. “Mmhmm?”

Leila sighed. “You remember the day we recorded our first video?”

Marie nodded. “Mmmh.”

“That morning, I had an anxiety attack. I couldn’t stay in the house, and I didn’t want to wake you up. So, I went out for a walk.”

Marie’s eyes widened. “I knew it! I knew there was something different about you that day. Morning walks are good for you, but there was more to it.”

And just like that, the dam broke.

Leila told Marie everything—about that first morning walk with Junior, about how he had walked her home the night Marie and Tim hung out, about how they kept bumping into each other during their morning walks. She gushed about how AMAZING and SMART she thought Junior was, how he was full of life. She suspected it had something to do with how artistic he was. He wasn’t conventionally funny, but somehow, he always made her smile.

And his body—God, his body.

She liked how he talked, especially when he was serious about something. She found herself wondering: where had this boy been all her life? Actually, where had Gramps been hiding him?

Oh, and yes—she couldn’t stop calling Jay Gramps because she loved how it sounded when Junior said it.

When she finally stopped, Marie just stared at her, eyes glowing with amusement.

“Look at you,” she said, shaking her head. “I love it when you’re excited about something. You’re so beautiful.”

Leila smiled. “Love you too.”

Marie leaned in with a wicked grin. “Well, he better not hurt you! Otherwise, I’m hunting him down and burning all his black trousers.”

Leila chuckled. “Hold your horses, boo. We’re just friends.”

Marie smirked. “That’s what you think. Time will tell.”

Leila rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

The truth was, she had thought about it—her and Junior. The possibility was beautiful. But she wasn’t going to let herself get carried away. She wanted things to flow naturally. She wanted to see him for who he really was, not create some fantasy version of him in her head.

She had learned that lesson the hard way.