2. Larissa
998 Words
NARRATED BY LARISSA
My name is Larissa. I am 18 years old, 5'7" tall, with straight black hair that reaches my waist and brown eyes. I am quite different from conventional beauty standards. I wear a European size 44 and have always been chubby since I was little. My life has never been easy. I was always bullied at school because of my weight. I never had many friends because of this. I finished high school last year and am taking a nursing course.
I lived with my parents in a very simple house, in a more humble neighborhood of Rio de Janeiro. Our house was small but full of love and care. My parents were my anchor, my safe harbor amidst difficulties. They always supported me in difficult times, especially when I faced the cruelties of my classmates at school.
Bullying has always been a shadow in my life. Since I was a child, I was the target of malicious comments and disdainful looks for not fitting into the beauty standards imposed by society. No matter how much I tried to be friendly or helpful, there was always someone ready to point out my physical flaws.
Finishing high school was a relief mixed with sadness. I was eager to start the nursing course, an area where I could help people and make a difference, but at the same time, leaving school meant leaving behind years of bullying and loneliness.
Living in a humble neighborhood had its challenges, but it was the home I knew and loved. My family had little, but we were happy together. My mother worked as a cleaner, and my father worked as a construction worker. They did their best to provide a better life for me than theirs.
Everything changed drastically just a week ago when a fire destroyed our house and took my parents from me. It felt like the ground had been pulled out from under me. Losing my parents was a blow from which I still haven't recovered. My world completely collapsed, leaving me adrift in a sea of pain and despair.
Since then, I have been struggling to find a reason to continue. The emptiness inside me seems insurmountable. Every day, I try to gather the strength to move forward, even if it seems like an impossible task.
I have a single friend named Milena. We met in the last year of school, and since then, she has been my anchor, the only person who genuinely approached me. Milena always defended me when people mocked my size. She has a good living condition; however, I noticed something strange: she never invited me to her house. Whenever I mentioned the idea of visiting her, she made excuses. To this day, I don't understand the reason for this.
This week, Milena has tried to contact me several times, but I'm not in the right frame of mind to talk. I don't want to look at anyone or face the outside world. I haven't even been able to return to the nursing course. Dona Maria has been an angel to me, treating me with much care. However, I know I can't be a burden to her for long. I need to find a way to support myself and move forward.
The pain of losing my parents is suffocating. Each day is a battle against sadness and despair. I feel lost, without a clear direction. My mind is confused and my heart is broken. The only certainty I have is that I need to find the strength to move forward, even if it's difficult.
Thinking about getting a job seems to be the only viable solution at the moment. I need to be independent and start rebuilding my life. I know it won't be easy, especially without my parents' support, but it's what needs to be done.
I need to focus on myself, on finding a way out of this void that consumes me. Even though the journey seems lonely and arduous, it's the only possible path for me now.
Dona Maria has a daughter who recently got married and moved out, so I was occupying her room. I was lying in bed when she came to get me.
“Larissa, my dear, there's a girl outside who wants to see you,” Dona Maria said, gazing at my eyes which were swollen from incessant crying.
I didn't want to see anyone; I wasn't in the mood for it.
“Dona Maria, please, tell her I'm sleeping,” I requested, pulling the covers over my head.
“Come on, dear, get up. Go see your friend. It will be good for you to talk to someone,” she insisted, gently pulling the blanket off me and looking at me sympathetically. “Please, Larissa, see the girl. Who knows, it might do you good to talk a little.”
Reluctantly, I gave in. I got out of bed and went outside. When I saw Milena at the gate, my heart sank. She ran towards me and hugged me tightly. Instinctively, I let myself be wrapped in her embrace, and there, my world collapsed. I began to cry uncontrollably, sobbing like a child.
Milena held me tightly, allowing me to release all my pain. For a moment, I felt safe and comforted in her arms as if she finally understood the weight of my anguish. Words weren't needed between us at that moment; her embrace said more than any conversation could express.
After a while, Milena gently pulled away to look at my face. Her eyes were filled with compassion and genuine concern.
“Larissa, I'm so sorry for everything you're going through,” she muttered softly. “I wish I had been by your side from the start.”
Milena caressed my face softly as if trying to calm the storm inside me.
“I'm here now, Larissa,” she said firmly. “I won't leave you alone. We'll get through this together.”
- Writer
