I floated in a void for a long time. Perhaps I was already dead, not even qualified to be called "existent."
Was I a soul? I desperately wanted to know how Charlotte would react when she found out I was dead. I wanted her to be sad, to regret. I wanted to know if there was still a place for me in her heart, even if it was just a little bit.
After an unknown amount of time, the scene in front of me slowly became clear. It was our home, the home I shared with Charlotte. The bed was a mess, and the floor was littered with torn clothes and used contraceptives.
She was lying in the arms of a man I didn't know, a fawning smile on her face. Her naked body was covered in the marks of lovemaking.
It was strange. Clearly, I was just a soul, but I felt a real heartache, a sharp, stabbing pain.
The man lifted his face. He had thin lips and a sharp jawline. His brows furrowed slightly with anger, his phoenix eyes holding a deep, unreadable expression.
"I don't ask because I'm not interested in knowing where you sneaked off to last night. It doesn't mean I don't mind." He grabbed Charlotte's hand.
Her delicate hands were covered in stark scratches, deep red scars that were painful to look at. "You're going to be punished properly today." As he spoke, he tied Charlotte's hands to the headboard.
I stared at the man's face, a realization dawning on me. In that instant, it was as if I had been pierced through, memories of the past flooding through my mind. He looked so much like me, both in appearance and demeanor.
I always knew my wife had a man she couldn't forget. I only knew that his name was Daniel.
I remember when we first met, she risked her life to save me, taking a knife for me, but the name she cried out was unfamiliar. Now I finally understood why. She rushed to save me, perhaps only because she mistook me for him.
It turned out that I was just a substitute for someone else. Now that the real one was back, she didn't need me anymore.
When I came back to my senses, Charlotte was kneeling between his legs, her waist twisting. I instinctively looked away, but the violent crashing sounds and her wanton moans almost broke me, completely extinguishing the last bit of love I had for her.
Charlotte, what was I to you? You were right. There was no man more pathetic than me. Even in death, I was still yearning for your love, but what about you?
Suddenly, I heard a call from another space, a faint beeping sound like a heart monitor in a hospital. The call was so real as if it were right next to my ear.
"Ethan, Ethan, wake up..."
Was I not dead?
*****
The voice disappeared quickly. I was trapped in the house, unable to control myself and go anywhere else. I didn't know if I was dead or alive.
I glanced at the time on Charlotte's phone. It had been two days since my accident. For two days, I was forced to watch her flirt and cuddle with another man in my house.
We had been married for a year and moved into our new home for less than six months. Charlotte had always had a strong sense of insecurity.
To reassure her, I put her name alone on the deed and gave her my debit card.
Today happened to be payday. I was neither dead nor alive, but she still collected my salary as usual. I also saw her transfer all the balance in our joint account to a stranger's account.
This was the wife I loved the most. I hadn't even signed the divorce papers yet, and she couldn't wait to take all our shared assets. The funny thing was, I never really looked at the divorce agreement. I bet it was just to leave me with nothing.
When I came back to my senses, Daniel was rummaging through the fridge. "Don't you have anything to eat? I don't want takeout." Then, he found two boxes of dumplings and scoffed. "You made dumplings? When did you learn to make dumplings?"
Charlotte glanced at them and replied nonchalantly, "Not me, but they taste okay."
Yes, Charlotte had a stomach problem, so I learned to cook in different ways. She didn't like to eat breakfast, so I made her a lot of dumplings and kept them in the fridge.
She loved sweets, so I made all kinds of jams for her bread. I never let her wash the dishes, and I tried not to let her do any housework.
But now, she was cooking dumplings, carefully arranging them on a plate. They ate the dumplings I made with my own hands as if they were the real couple.
After the meal, Daniel wiped his mouth, his eyes sharp. "Hasn't he signed it yet?"
Charlotte's hand froze, hesitating. "I'll take care of it."
The man stood up, walked behind Charlotte, and placed his hand on her shoulder. The veins on the back of his hand were bulging, he was squeezing hard. "My patience is limited. If you don't mind, I can use other means. You hid from me before and made me go through so much trouble to find you. I haven't punished you yet." His voice was deep and chilling.
Charlotte's body was trembling slightly. Daniel's hand moved from her shoulder to the back of her neck, and he slammed her head against the dining table. Charlotte's chin hit the bowls and chopsticks, crashing against the edge of the table with a loud bang.
"Speak! You bitch."