THE TWINKLING

CHAPTER 10

I glanced up at the window on the back wall; it was sinfully small, even with the sun at its zenith there wouldn’t be much sunlight coming into our cell. Feeling slightly more in control of myself, I got up and turned on the light. I eased back down on the stool beside Dee; and very carefully put my head to her chest and listened to her heart. It sounded awful! Each beat came later and later, as if it were winding down.

Nearing panic, I shook her again, “Dee, please wake up, honey! Please!”

Suddenly, Dee sat up and took a long deep breath. She opened her eyes, and they were normal again. She blinked rapidly, and asked, “Jade, wha’s wrong? Is it mornin’ a’ready?”

“Yes, and we have inspection in about five minutes. Are you alright, Dee?”

Appearing confused, she answered. “Yeah, I thank so. I bin havin’ some bad dreams, but I’m okay.”

Rattled, but going for normal, I said, “Good, you had me worried for a moment there. Now tell me what’s required for inspection. I don’t want to spend the entire day locked up in here. I have to call my family.”

Dee tried to stand, but fell back onto the bunk with an, “Ohooo!”

“Dee! You are sick, girl! I’m calling for someone to help you.”

As I rose, she grabbed my arm with an unusual amount of strength, pleading, “No! Please, Jade, I don’t wanna go ta medical. All dey gon’ do is gi’ me Tylenol an’ sen’ me rat back here, an’ I’ll havta stay in all day.”

I stared at her for a moment, trying to decide whether to agree with her or not. There were dark circles under both of her eyes, and she was even paler than before, if that was possible. Finally, I said, “Okay, but we have to get ready for inspection, and then it’s back to bed for you, young lady! You don’t look well and I am really worried about you.”

“Awright, you fix yo’ bed, an’ I’ll do mine. De res’ o’ de room looks okay. Kin ya he’p me stan’?”

Nodding, I helped her up. Dee tried to fix her bed, but she just tumbled onto it. I sat beside her saying, “That’s it! I’m getting help for you right now.”

Dee pleaded again, “No! Please, dem C.O.s don’t cotton ta nobody makin’ trouble ‘roun’ here!”

I was horrified! Cotton! What the hell did that mean? I made a mental note to ask her later. Instead, I said, “Dee, you’re sick, honey, you’re not making trouble. It’s their job to look after us. It shouldn’t be an inconvenience for them, and if it is then they should start looking for another position.”

Perking up a bit, Dee said, “I bet you’d tell ‘em dat rat ta deir faces too, wouldn’t ya?”

Rolling my eyes, I said, “Probably. Yes, I would. But we’ve got to get ready for inspection, honey. So I’ll leave it to you, what do you want to do?”

She looked at me, gave a sigh, then she said, “I can do dis!” With tremendous effort, she stood up.

“Alright! But, don’t try making your bed.”

I helped her lean against the wall. “Stand here, I’ll make the beds, okay.”

Dee nodded; she was so weak from standing she couldn’t even speak. I made the beds quickly, there wasn’t much to it; straighten the sheet and pull up the blanket.

Just as I finished with my bed, Dee let out a little yelp. I turned in time to catch her as she slid down the wall. “Whoa there, are you alright?”

Her eyes were closed. I thought she had fainted, but she said. “Yeah, I’m okay. It’s jus’ de sun, it’s so hot, I thank it burnt me.”

Dee lifted her arm and I saw what appeared to be a fresh second-degree burn. In fact, I would have sworn I saw smoke rise from her flesh. I was freaking out again!

In the midst of a ‘what the hell’ moment, I helped Dee to the toilet and lowered her on the seat. I leaned down to get a better look at her arm asking, “Dee, how long have you been feeling ill? You didn’t just wake up this morning feeling this weak, did you?”

She spoke with her eyes closed, as if the effort to open them was beyond her. “Well, I ain’t bin feelin’ good all week, but t’day, dis is de wors’. I swear I thank I’m dying. Don’t let me die, Jade, please! I get outta here in a mont’, an’ I promised God I’d change my life if He gabe me anotha chance.”

She had said that with such desperation, I felt like crying for her.

“Dee, God hears and answers prayers all the time. So don’t worry, we’re going to find out what’s causing this illness and soon you’ll be fine. After inspection we’ll get some breakfast into you; and you’ll get some of your strength back, you’ll see.”

She gave me a tiny smile saying, “Jade, breakfas’ was at five-thirdy dis mornin’. Afta inspection we git lunch at ten-thirty.”

Who had lunch at ten-thirty in the morning was on the tip of my tongue, when a loud voice said, “Inspection up!” and the doors unsealed like a mausoleum tomb.

“What do we do, Dee? Do we stay in here?”

“No, we stan’ by de do’, an’ dem C.O.s come by an’ look in ta make sure e’rythin’s fixed up.”

“Okay, let’s get to the door. Come on, I’ll help you.” I gently lifted her arm around my shoulder and helped her to the door. She hissed in pain when my hand accidentally brushed against her burn. I leaned her against the door and stood beside it with her.

Dee whispered, “Shoes. We gots ta hab on shoes fo’ inspection.”

I ran back in and grabbed her sneakers and my shoes. Thank God I had worn the penny loafers my mom had given me. I slipped her sneakers on her feet as the C.O.s walked onto the block.

Dee whispered, “Oh no, not Lincoln!”

Before I could form a question, the first C.O., who just happened to be Lincoln, yelled out, “I’m not in the mood for no s**t today, so y’all f*****g better be ready for inspection!”

If ignorance is bliss then she lives in paradise crossed my mind. C.O. Lincoln was a big woman; not fat, but big. The term, ‘big-boned’ would fit her perfectly. She was also brown—her clothes, face, hair—everything; brown! If they dimmed the lights a little more she would have disappeared. And, she was mean! Mean simply for the sake of being mean! There was a long scar on the right side of her face, which I learned later was given to her by an inmate who caught up with her on the outside. Well, as my mom says, “You live by the sword, you die by the sword.”

The other C.O., whose nameplate read, Hawkins, was young and slender with a long ponytail. I could tell by looking at her she didn’t have Lincoln’s attitude. She actually looked embarrassed at the spectacle Lincoln was making of herself. I thought if Dee got any worse, she’d be the one I would go to for help. There was a rainbow of women standing outside of their cells, Black, White, Asian and Latino. Everyone had the same why am I here expression on their faces.

C.O. Lincoln put her hands on her generous hips and walked into the middle of the block. “No fuckin’ talking during inspection! You bitches understand that?”

She began walking from cell-to-cell. She didn’t actually go in the cell; she glanced through the door and moved on to the next. She finished with one side and I thought she was on her way over to us, but she went up the stairs. No one spoke, everything remained very quiet; C.O. Hawkins sat on one of the stools watching us. I heard rather than saw C.O. Lincoln returning down the stairs. I glanced at Dee to see how she was holding up, she was literally gray! I nudged her with my shoulder and mouthed the words, ‘Are you alright?’

Dee nodded lethargically. I didn’t believe her; the girl needed help fast.

C.O. Lincoln came over to our side walking very slowly, looking into each cell. Suddenly, she put her hands out in front of her, took about three steps back, and said, “Someone is living foul right around here!” She made a circle with her hands. Everyone in that area glanced at each other silently communicating, ‘Here we go again.’

“You bitches better start using that shower! Cause one of you is funky up in here! And I ain’t having that on my block, you got that?”

Finally, Lincoln came to our cell, looked in and then looked at Dee and me like we were aliens. She barked, “Oh, you the new girl, huh?”

“Yes.”

“What’s yo’ name?”

“Jade. Jade Stillwater.”

“Un huh. Well, Jade Stillwater, I don’t take no s**t on my block, you understand?”

“Yes, I do. But, if I may . . .”

Looking at me as if I owed her money and was late in paying, C.O. Lincoln barked, “Excuse me? I is talking now!”

I don’t do well with arrogance or ignorance. I think the reason is most people like that live off the fear they cause others. They confuse fear with respect and they need to feed heavily off people who can’t defend themselves. Sometimes I think Satan’s real name is arrogance and ignorance.

Well, I had had enough, and I said to her, “C.O. Lincoln, I don’t wish to appear insubordinate, but there is a situation here that I believe you will want to familiarize yourself with post haste; before it galvanizes into something incongruous.”

C.O. Lincoln turned her head like a dog does trying to comprehend a command before she asked, “Okay, so what’s wrong?”

“Thank you, it’s my roommate . . .”

“Cellmate! This ain’t no college, you know!”

I put both my hands out in a peaceful gesture and said, “I stand corrected. My friend, Dee, is very ill. She can barely stand and I believe she needs medical attention immediately.”