Chapter three
1799 Words
HANNAH
Men are scums…That was the exact thought that flickered through my mind at the moment.
My head felt light as the second gulp of whiskey settled— it created a feeling that sunk deep into the core of my dark soul.
It's been three days since I caught James cheating, since then what I would say is my life has been a hell of a rollercoaster…One filled with ups and downs.
I was getting tipsy and at that second gulp I rushed to the toilet to throw up. The truth was I had never drank too much up till this moment; alcohol loosened my tongue, to the point I feared what I would say or do but at this moment it was totally different.
I was totally going crazy at the moment,shut out of life and everything else it was like stating the obvious that
I and alcohol didn’t mix yet I wasn’t ready to give it away yet as it turned out it was helping me heal In a certain way.
I didn't know if I’d ever be sane again, if I would want to give my heart to another , I was done with love and was shutting out everyone for good.
Looking in the mirror, I could see that I was the shadow of myself…A total mess of what I used to be .
My hair was undone and ruffled, my clothes stinked as I had been in my pajamas for days and my soul, There wasn't much I could say about it.
It was funny how I had everything going on in my life so well and laced one particular thing love, it looked to be the only thing missing in my life
James wasn't my first heartbreak, he was just a reminder that perhaps I was cursed never to find my happily ever after.
When you’re groomed and brought up in a certain way all through your childhood it exposes me to certain things, while mine has been money it has exposed me to other norms in my life.
When I walked back into my room, I saw that the window was open and a maid was standing by the side of the window looking around the room that had not seen any sunlight for three days.
"This is a total mess." Samantha said, twitching her nose.
Sam had been my personal maid ever since I could remember, mid- forties and attractive. She seemed to be up with everything that was going on in my life.
"You need to forget about that Silly boy and move on with your life." She was the second person telling me this.
I groaned as I sat with a thud on my bed.
She sat next to me on the bed looking worried as hell.
"He came by this morning." I muttered to her.
"James?"
She shook her. "Who else, the son of a b***h showed his ugly ass here" she scoffed. "What guts!"
"What are your plans for today, you know you can't be this way all your life."
I rolled my eyes , the truth was I was in no mood for any prep talk this morning or ever I just wanted to be left alone, but immediately I saw Sam I knew that was indefinite.
She sighed. "Your parents are worried you know." She placed a hand on my shoulder trying to call them.
She handed me my phone that should have been switched off.
As if pre-planned, my mom's call came in almost immediately.
Unsurprisingly, it was because James called to tell her about having a fight with me—I scoffed at that fact.
It was strange not having my back, despite telling her what he did, she appeared to prefer us dating over the need for my happiness.
In a way, she was settled on getting some business deal done and needed his influence, once again it was my mother being manipulative as she always was.
Soon enough I was ending her call filled with spitefulness. As a certain discomfort tightened my lungs.
As I was about to drop my phone Lauren's message came in.
An intuition played in the back of my mind, as it did, it sent a wave of uncertainty through me questioning if I wanted to speak to her just yet or stay buried beneath my dark emotions .
The word —I told you so —had popped up so many times that I was done hearing it.
Yet the need to reply to her message itched,there was that demand and urge that I should speak to someone or I would go crazy.
Before I could stop myself I grabbed my phone from the table and sent her a reply through her text.
Me: Did you know James cheated?
She responded a minute later.
Lauren : WTF, Ann, No. That bastard.
Me: Been down, don't know what to do .
Lauren: Calm down, should I come over?
I thought about it for a second . . .
Me: Not in the mood to speak with anyone just yet .
I dropped my phone and fell back to the bed wondering what I was going to do.
As I stared at Sam who was busy making my room tidy. A sudden thought, a need to know, came to my mind and escaped through my lips before I could stop it. “Are you sure my mother loves me?"
Sam stopped working and looked me straight in the eyes as if trying to convey her thoughts.
"Why do you ask?".
My heart thumped deep within my chest, perhaps I shouldn't have asked that question that looked to be very invasive.
The atmosphere seemed tense and I was expecting a tongue lashing from her since she was the only one that could do that after my mother.
Instead, her gaze leveled on mine, not liking my question either, but she kept her
words smooth with a smile. “Do you expect her not to love her only child ?”
My response was calm and unsuggestive. “I don't know what to believe.”
Her deep stare burned me, creating a scar in its wake, with the tiniest shake of
his head, she came in my direction and sat back on the bed.
My heart leapt as I looked away to get to the other direction, a warm breeze came from the window and sent a shiver down my spine. I couldn’t think clearly.
She stared at me like I was the most unintelligent woman – child she had ever come across
Shaking her head again in a type of roguish disbelief.
“You honestly think she doesn't love you?"
I had no idea why I’d said it. But for once in three days I felt better after speaking my mind.
I swallowed down my breathlessness. "I don't know what to believe."
“That would be inappropriate.” she answered, scoffing.
Both of our gazes dropped.
"I don't know why she is always forcing me to do s**t take James' scenario as a good example."
A sarcastic gaze flicked to me before she glanced back to the napkin that was folded carefully on her lap.
“Please tell me you are not thinking of running away."
Despite myself I smiled, I wouldn't say it hadn't crossed my mind at certain times but it was the last thing on my mind at that moment.
“No I can't do that." I said dryly.
“You know it been hard for her ever since your father died, she had taking her time to build up the legacy he left behind and you two might not have had the healthiest
relationship due to her being away most of the time but trust me loves you."
I ran my hand through my hair. “I love
her too but she shouldn't try getting me together with him again, I don't love him anymore."
A little lump formed in my throat as I spoke.
“Sometimes love isn’t enough, Hannah."
“Of course not,” I responded with a serious tone, and I thought she was going to agree with me for once and not sound like my mother during the conversation. " You just have to heal and get power, that is just it."
"Power?" I asked.
She shook her head and I sighed.
"Now let me go get you a good meal."
"I don't feel like eating."
"Nonsense, I would bring it down here and force it down your throat if possible."
I scoffed as she Walked out, just then my phone rang from where it was as I frowned wondering who was calling.
I squeezed my face when I saw who it was—
I could tell she was calling me for gossip and rolled my eyes muttering Lauren
"Hello?" I answered, picking up the call.
"I am outside your door ." Her voice through the call.
"Really, thought I told you—" Lauren hung up before I could say anything more.
Soon, I was making my way down to the door in just my robe. Immediately I opened the door as Lauren grabbed me in a bear hug.
I groaned, and tried to fight my
way out of it, but she held on still not willing to move away so quickly but then she sucked in a breath wincing
“f**k…you stink."
"Well, I was in a worse state before you came in." I answered, rolling my eyes.
I pushed the door close as we walked up to my room with Lauren behind me ranting away.
"So you're saying that Son -of- a b***h did all that to you ?"
"Yeah …" I sighed. "Wish I had listened to you."
She thought for a while as her gaze settled on me.
"You look terrible." She spat out jokingly.
"I wish you saw the state I was in before now."
"Well, you can't be this way."
She tried pulling me up but gave up when I didn't let her .
"What are you talking about?" I asked confused as she stood before me— akimbo
"First we have to show his sorry ass some lesson." She snapped her fingers as she spoke.
I shook my head "Not in the mood for that."
She thought for a while and walked toward my closet.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
I should have known she wouldn't take no for an answer.
"Well you can't stay here forever, you have to mingle up and meet someone new."
"I am not in the mood for—" I groaned.
"Not taking no for an answer." She interrupted and threw a dress to the bed.
"We are going out tonight."
I gave a deep sigh.
- Writer
