Beyond Fate

The help

A while later we were in Mitchell's car driving back to the pack house. I'd actually been very impressed with Mina’s ability to hold her mountain of ice cream.

She hadn’t held back on the park either, up and down the slide, the swing, the roundabout, she even made it to Alpha Mitchell’s car before she puked. luckily we hung her over the edge so she puked on the grass instead of Mitchell’s leather seats. She was fine after but she was tired out and was now fast asleep in her car seat wearing one of Mitchell’s T-shirt’s after she ruined her dress when she was sick. I looked back at her from the front seat taking her in, she looked so peaceful, her little mouth pouting slightly as she slept giving off the tiniest of snores, her arms and legs poking slightly out of the giant t.shirt. she seemed so tiny the shirt was enormous on her but thank goddess for wolves always packing extra clothes everywhere they went.

“ she adores you you know” my gaze pulled away from Mina to look back at Mitchell. His words touched somewhere deep in my heart, making me feel warm.

“ she’s a wonderful little girl, you're very lucky sir, but I’m sure you already know that” I whispered looking back at Mina adoringly there weren't words to describe how much love I had for this little pup.

“ Why do you keep calling me sir all of a sudden?” He asked frowning, taking his eyes off the road for a second.

“ Just being respectful” I dipped my head to him. It was appropriate to call ones alpha by title or sir he hadn’t been alpha long and pack members would have started calling him by his title once he’d finished his alpha training had he returned afterwards.

“‘I made you uncomfortable earlier” it wasn’t a question. He looked slightly torn up like he had said too much and I felt the need to reassure him.

“ no” I lied “ it’s just....you have more important things to worry about, you don’t need to trouble yourself with my misfortune” it was a better answer than to embarrass myself by telling him I mistook his need to protect me as more for a moment. And it wasn’t a lie he did have more important things to worry about. He had kept his promise, I was safe in the pack now. I wasn’t being physically abused anymore and he had punished the guilty for my beating even my family were impressed with his swift justice for me.

“ The pack opinion of you is wrong Alisha, I’m sorry I had a hand in that when I first arrived, I want to rectify it and I do think Lucas leaving the way he did was wrong of him, I know he will regret it” ahhh so he still feels guilty for being an asshole when he first got here, his treatment of me today made a lot more sense now. It wasn’t his fault, I’d seen the state of him when he’d first come home just because he had cleaned up his look didn’t mean he was any less broken but despite everything he was actually becoming a pretty amazing alpha. Johnny was happier now he was given more responsibility he could do his job without feeling like he had Nathan pulling on an invisible collar around his neck. With the new security system in place the pack was more alert to any problems and now restrictions on leaving the territory had been loosened people were finding themselves becoming happier now they had more freedom. He didn’t realise but he was slowly bringing the pack out of the hole it was in. However he had once told me not long ago if he didn’t rectify his initial mistake with me nothing else good he did within the pack would matter.

‘That’s why he’s being kind to me, he's trying to ease his conscience’ I told myself but it was unnecessary he had done everything he could to protect me and it wasn’t for him to have to keep babying me, yes I’d let Lucas do that but it was different and if anything the whole thing had shown me I can’t keep relying on everyone else all the time to fix my life, I needed to start looking after myself.

“ It's not just the rumours fuelling this, Kelly has her own reasons” the words were out before I could even stop myself and I couldn’t believe I said it out loud after four years of being so careful.

“ kelly? why?” That was a loaded question, one I didn’t really want to get into right now. I couldn't stand seeing him pity me anymore and what if he felt the need to intervene with that too, what if he forced Nathan to mate me my life would become a living hell. I knew I needed to answer him in some way though he could make me submit and command me to tell him. As we pulled into the parking spaces for the cars outside the pack house I took a deep breath and just said it.

“ it’s because of my mate..... but please I don’t wish to discuss it” I peered up at him and could tell he could see the pain in my eyes almost matching his when he spoke of Rose.

A mate should bring nothing but joy when it doesn’t it either means they rejected you or their dead, both of which cause the other wolf nothing but pain. Mitchel and I both had a taste of that pain. He never wanted to talk about his Rose anymore than I wanted to talk about Nathan. rejection was rare but it was still incredibly painful. Alpha Mitchell would never guess Nathan was my mate let alone that he rejected me for a chosen mate. No one did that by choice once fate had spoken, even if it was me the most likely woman to be rejected.

“ Would you tell me about it someday?” He asked his voice so gentle, he placed his hand in mine for comfort and I could have cried at his thoughtfulness. ‘Someday’ was a day in the future that rarely ever existed so I suppose I could agree to that. It's unlikely alpha Mitchell will ever remember this conversation anyway. I looked over at him. There was such sadness in his eyes, not pity but something more, like a shared pain, he understood how much I was hurting but at least he had some happy memories with Rose to console him and he had Mina to light up his day. I smiled weakly at him.

“ I’ll tell you my story if you tell me yours” I chuckled, wiping away the tears that were about to fall. Alpha Mitchell took my hand wiping away the tears from my fingers.

“ I want to see you happy Alisha. I hate the way you're treated within this pack and I promise I’ll do everything I can to stop it…. I feel very protective of you” he stared into space confused like he didn’t understand his own emotions.

“ of course you do... I’m your pack member, an alpha is born with the instinct to protect his pack” I smiled and he sighed heavily as if that wasn’t what he meant did he not understand his own alpha instincts. I suppose he was still coming into them most alphas at his age had been in the position years already he’d only had the job for months I should give him a break.

“ don’t worry alpha I’m a big girl, I’ll handle the evil trolls, you handle the pack” we both smiled weakly and I knew I’d cause him to think about Rose, why did I have to say it was mate stuff. More tears fell and I sniffed using my other hand to wipe them this time.

“ argh don’t you ever just get pissed off at being sad all the time” I laughed then realised I just swore in front of the alpha. He laughed thankfully.

“ yea…..yea actually I do” the atmosphere felt lighter which I was thankful for I didn’t want to end the day on a low note when I’d actually had fun for once, it felt like Mitchell and I were normal 20 somethings hanging out like friends do maybe I could consider my alpha a friend.

Bang! Bang ! Bang !

Someone started banging on Mitchell’s window startling us both out of our staring contest, Mitchell rolled down the window to reveal a seething Nathan.

“ What's wrong Nathan?” Alpha Mitchell looked genuinely concerned for his beta. I saw Nathan looking down at mine and Mitchell’s joined hands. I pulled mine back quickly hoping to defuse the situation. I had nothing to feel bad for Nathan was the one with a chosen mate but I didn’t want him thinking something was going on between me and his alpha when there wasn’t. rumours would spread like wildfire and i didn’t want to cause Mitchell hassle, after all he didn’t know Nathan was my mate.

“ There's a matter that requires your attention alpha” Nathan said through gritted teeth he looked pissed not taking his eyes off me what was he even doing out here lurking. didn’t he have a poker game or something? Maybe there was a problem?.

“ Ok man give me a second to take Mina upstairs..” Mitchell undid his seatbelt but I stopped him.

“ NO ....no no alpha let me handle her Beta Nathan obviously needs you” before alpha Mitchell could protest I jumped out going round the car, feeling Nathan’s eyes follow me the anger rolling off him. What the hell did he have to be pissed about, arsehole. obviously still thought he had some kind of claim on me. When Lucas had left he had just assumed I’d go crawling back to him but I had proved him very f*****g wrong. I opened the passenger door and scooped a sleeping Mina up carrying her tiny form bridle style into the pack house without looking back to see if the men were following me.

As I tucked Mina up in bed I thought about everything, unable to take the smile off my face. I had the best time with Alpha Mitchell and Mina this afternoon. It was wonderful. I was glad Mina and Mitchel were getting along better. It was nice to see their relationship outside the pack. It was so freeing. Mitchell seemed so relaxed and happy it had been the first time since Lucas had left that I’d smiled. I was so grateful to have been invited on their day out. I'd been even more grateful for them saving me earlier. Without Alpha Mitchell’s intervention I’d be wearing that hideous costume facing humiliation at my own brother's wedding. I wasn't going to let the strange moment with Mitchell earlier worry me now things were settled and I’d had the best afternoon.

As I headed back from Mina's room after, I could hear chuckling coming from one of the common rooms on the second level, knowing exactly who it was. The shrill cackles went through me like they did every time I heard them, I caught what they were saying as I walked past, unfortunately making me stop.

“ I can't believe she’s wearing the same as us now” one voice said angrily.

“ oh who cares at least the alpha paid, now I can spend more on my own dress” defiantly Tammy.

“ I just can’t believe what he said about us being beautiful,” another said.

“ err he was looking at me” one girl argued.

“ no me” the other countered, Jesus they were like toddlers.

“ I can’t believe he stuck up for that silly mutt, it's like he actually cares about her…you know she went with them for ice cream after” one voice sounded a little too disgusted.

“ oh, please, she’s the help. Why do you think he asks her to go everywhere.... duh free babysitter for that brat of his” that was definitely Kelly, I’d recognise the evil in the voice anywhere my wolf held back a growl at the mention of Mina how dare she call her that. I felt my hands balled into fists wanting to inflict some pain.

“ Seriously, why would the alpha want his beta’s reject” I gasped as they all started laughing in unison. They all knew I was Nathan’s mate. My heart plunged into my stomach, first Colton and now Kelly’s minions that meant Tammy knew who else knew, Johnny? No Nathan would be dead in his grave if the men in my family knew about it.

“ speaking of I’m going home to screw Nathan’s brains out hopefully the runt feels it through her wolf” I heard whistles and cheers, the truth was their comment about alpha Mitchell only wanting me for help with Mina hurt more than anything else not b***h face bragging about how she would bed my mate when she got home, besides she was wrong I hadn’t felt them together like that in over a year I could still feel the agony fresh in my stomach though I always figured my body had somehow blocked it out it had felt like I was dying in the early days which had made it hard to hide.

I’d never felt them together again so acutely since my birthday last year they usually celebrated the day by having a s*x marathon just to ruin it for me so I ended up in bed all day in agony.

I hated that it always worked but I hadn’t felt anything since then. Other than having a few chest pains. Something like heartburn, not really understanding that the pain of the mate bond betrayal changes after so long without the mate marking the other, the bond begins to fade but never fully disappears.

At the time it had stupidly filled me with false hope that they weren’t sleeping together anymore, I’d thought Nathan had changed his mind about me being his mate. the hope was ignited more when he’d turned up at my house three weeks later when my parents have gone on holiday.He’d spent the entire night in my bed, I’d felt such joy that morning when I’d woken up believing our night together meant he’d chosen me over Kelly but that hope was shattered when I’d seen him and Kelly in their usual spot behind the training centre that afternoon having s*x, my fragile heart had shattered.

I’d run away crying my eyes out realising Nathan had used me yet again and had never stopped sleeping with Kelly he’d just had a moment of weakness wanting his mate and giving in to the bond he’d said a few words of wanting me and fake apologise so I’d roll over just so he could claim my body like the arsehole he was. I wish I could say that was the only time we’d had s*x over the last year but Nathan could never resist his lust for me for very long and I was programmed to want him but I never let him in my bed anymore. Something had snapped in me since that day and I’d begun to hate him as much as Kelly.

My wolf still wanted him and on the odd occasion he’d corner me in the pack house I couldn't resist the mate pull but I was no longer some desperate mate pining for him or trying to prove myself worthy and for the last six months I’d proudly told him to piss off. I’d only given in when I’d gone into heat but it was only one time and I’d managed to escape him the moment the first burn was over, afterwards I’d gone straight to Astrid begging for help, she had given me masking spray and a sedative so I had spent the remainder of my heat unconscious.

That reminded me my heat would be due again soon. I'd make sure to visit Astrid in the next few days. She was like a mother to the omegas only a few years older but she looked out for the females in the pack house always making sure the males were not taking advantage. She knew I had a mate but she never asked who, she always helped me out with it, though I felt terrible I couldn’t go to mom about it but it would mean telling her about Nathan. females only went into heat once their wolf found their mate so it would be a no brainer and mom was relentless that’s what made her such a good hunter she didn’t stop until she found the truth it wouldn’t be enough to tell her I’d been rejected by my mate, she would want the entire story.

Feeling the high of this afternoon completely drained from me I took my pathetic ass home narrowly avoiding Kelly on her way out. I held back for a few moments just to be sure she was gone.

On my way downstairs out of the pack house I passed by the alphas office, the door was slightly ajar I could here Nathan and Mitchell talking it was late and no one else was around I don’t know why but I pressed my back against the wall tilting my head to listen in on the conversation maybe it was the chance to get some insight on official pack business or maybe it was the sound of my mates voice but I couldn’t stop myself.

“ they're getting ballsy they haven’t got this close to the territory in three years it has to be the same group” Nathan spoke sounding agitated.

“ They know I’ve taken over as alpha, it’s just scare tactics. It doesn't matter right now but I don’t want the pack thinking there’s a problem, so let’s keep the attack between us. Do we know anymore about the body at the border?” attack? Body? There had been another attack on the pack. What the hell.

“ no the body is still in the morgue….well what’s left of it anyway, he wasn’t one of ours so we don’t know what to think…his heart was ripped out and then he was disembowell before being strung up at the border” Nathan said in a board tone and I was actually very disturbed by his lack of concern.

“ Nathan, I was there with Colton. I know what happened, what I want to know is why he was out there and why? It wasn’t an accident your job is to find out who it is doing it” Mitchell said sounding irritated clearly it wasn’t just me disturbed by Nathan’s lack of appreciation of how serious two simultaneous attacks are.

“ Johnny sent Colton out with some trackers but there was no sign of rogues but this afternoon’s attack definitely was”

“ So you think the two incidents have nothing to do with the other?” Two threats? Two separate attacks.

“ I think we could have some real trouble coming our way they hit us from the south in the direction of the town this afternoon”

“ What are you saying Nathan?”

“ do you think it’s possible they knew you’d be coming back that way they just miss timed it?”

“ You think they were targeting me directly?” Mitchell sounded concerned why would rogues target the alpha outside the pack wolf law stated that a rouge could challenge an alpha on his pack land for territory but if they had succeeded in their attack off the territory the pack would go to the Beta not the rouges. They had nothing to gain from attacking Mitchell like that. Nathan had to be wrong.

“ well there was plenty that knew you’d be out with Mina for the day, you hadn’t taken any security with you, yes I think it’s entirely possible” I felt sick at the thought something could have happened to Mina.

“ You think there’s a mole in the pack?” Mitchell asked.

“ It just seems a little too convenient Mitch, your so called friend vanished without a word, the same night there’s a disembowell body found at the border, the rogues attacked from the same direction you would have travelled back from at the exact time you were supposed to arrive back. there’s too many coincidences” Nathan said I frowned thinking his theory was a bit far fetched.

“ What does Lucas have to do with all this?” Mitchell asked defensively.

“ I’m just saying how well did you know this creep before you let him into our pack?” Nathan pushed.

“ MY PACK Nathan my pack and Lucas is a better man than any of us rest assured he wouldn’t do what your suggesting” Mitchell voice sounded angry and I didn’t blame him but then my mind went back to the voicemail on the mobile I had heard, it made me realise I didn’t know Lucas at all.

“ let’s double the patrols at the border and no one but you is to know my schedule from now on” I frowned thinking at what a terrible idea that was, what about Johnny he was pack warrior how was he supposed to protect the pack if he didn’t know the alphas schedule not to mention the now potential two threats. Everything in my gut told me it was wrong.

“Yes alpha... so why were you late back tonight anyway?” Nathan’s voice now casual signalling business was over.

“ oh errrr we were waiting for Alisha...”

“ ALISHA!!! So you're on a first name basis now? The other day she was just ‘the omega’” Nathan growled, ouch that hurt it’s what I was but still Mitchell made a big deal about me calling him sir earlier but he was calling me omega to others.

“ don’t be cruel, she’s a nice enough girl” Mitchell scolded Nathan but it was more of a whine than an actual scold, however hearing him jump to my defence warmed my heart.

“ dude I’m all for you getting to know the pack and socialising but seriously it doesn’t look good when you're playing happy families with the pack outcast...” double ouch. Why was I still stood listening.

“ Nathan she was wrongly accused of something she didn’t do I’m looking out for her, she’s been mistreated enough for no good reason and besides she’s Johnnys sister, part of the beta family” I slight smile appeared on my lips thinking it was nice to know alpha Mitchell was defending me even when I wasn’t around but then Nathan spoke again.

“ Beta by blood but that means nothing in the packs eyes when she’s carrying the mark of a coward, you know she hid in the storage cupboard during her trials and when it came to demonstrate strength she had her arse handed to her in front of everyone, her dad was so ashamed” my breathing laboured at the thought of my dad being ashamed of me. I’d only ever wanted to make him proud and show him I could be a good beta for him, it was my birthright and what he was owed after so much hardship during his years as pack beta.

“ I know you want to mend things with Johnny but don’t you think you’ve taken this thing with protecting the omega far enough now she’ll start getting ideas now that Lucas has had his fill and ditched her, clearly she’s only useful for one thing..”

“ SHUT UP!! Nathan you know Rose was my one, I felt sorry for the omega that’s all ....... besides she’s my pups babysitter I need to play nice for Mina’s sake she adores her” I wrapped my arms around myself trying to offer myself some comfort it didn’t work these revelations were too much and I was crumbling. I wanted to move away but I couldn’t seem to get my feet to work.

“ fine I just think maybe next time don’t come strolling up to the pack house like a happy family anyone could have seen it, f**k sake Mitch you were holding her hand…” Nathan growled at the last part.

“You need to set some boundaries, the omega might misinterpret your pity for something more” it went quiet for a moment and I heard a heavy sigh, it was like I could picture Mitchell sitting at his desk thinking hard about Nathan’s words.

“ I know you mean well but she’s not like us bro she’s an outsider even for an omega she isn’t used to people being kind to her she doesn’t even have any friends the only person I’ve ever seen her hang out with outside of her family is your pup.....you buy her an ice cream and spend a few hours with her she’s likely to think your in love with her. think about how it will look to the pack if word spreads, your reputation is everything” Nathan’s words hit me like a sledge hammer, he was right Mitchell had been nice to me and asked me out but I had begun to think about what it meant. I hadn’t thought about it much and I had shook the thought away quickly but it had still popped into my head for a second but Mitchell had said it himself ‘ I felt sorry for the omega’ not her or Alisha…omega. I felt my shoulders sag and tears slip free, rolling down my cheeks.

“She’s an omega nate, Alisha knows her place. I'd never lower myself to consider an omega a friend, never mind anything else. Now can we drop it, we still need to find out who’s responsible for these attacks….” I didn’t listen to any more of the conversation, blocking it out. It was all just background noise now.

I felt so devastated I should have just left when I had the chance. I walked back to my house in silence not really remembering how I got there but getting home I found the house quiet. I made my way up stairs stripping down to my underwear not caring to put on pyjamas. Crawling under the covers the cool sweet smelling sheets did nothing to ease the ache in my stomach, alpha Mitchell’s words had hurt, he had been buttering me up to make sure I didn’t decide to leave the pack like I’d suggested before. I had been wrong in my earlier estimation of him, it wasn’t guilt it was just an attempt to manipulate me, he needed to be sure now Lucas was gone I wouldn’t up sticks and leave too.

‘ I’d never lower myself to consider an omega a friend’ the words stung more than ever, things hadn’t changed why would I ever think otherwise.

I was stupid to allow myself to think I could be friends with my alpha the idea was actually laughable now I thought of it. To the alpha I was nothing more than something like dirt to be scraped off his boot. I was an omega, I was nothing. As Kelly said, even my own mate doesn’t want me.

When would I learn my lesson, sitting up in my bed I thought about how much faith I had put into people yet the only one’s in my life I could still trust was my family. At least I still had them and Mina. Alpha Mitchell needn't worry, I was going anywhere. Not to another pack or even to ‘the blocks’ I was staying right here in my home with my family and my muckin.

I grabbed my phone still on charge by my bedside table I wasn’t going to hide away feeling sorry for myself any more and I wasn’t going to put my faith in anyone outside my family either because the truth was I only had myself and that was fine, typing in my alarm to set it for four thirty I put it back on charge and lay down. This pack have had their fill of Alisha the omega starting tomorrow Alisha the Beta was making her come back.

I felt my wolf rising inside me growling with approval like she had been kept with the snooze button on for the last four years and she was finally waking up.

About f*****g time girl she purred and I lay against my pillow with a satisfied smile on my face.