Clumsy and unlucky

Part 1

Papers dropped on my desk, pulling my attention from the screen and over at the attitude of the short brunette, looking quite like a librarian with her glasses at the end of her nose, staring over the rim at me.

“Glasses?”

“Going blind apparently” she huffed “these are your daughters drawings. Mr Gregory wasn’t amused”

I flipped through the papers, separating the art from the updated salary packages Ashley had brought in with her.

I can see why her art wasn’t recieved well. The Woman had the biggest t**s i had seen on a drawing.

She was naked in the picture, even with a little slit between her legs. The rest of the Art followed the same direction. Just position changes.

She was a great little drawer, very detailed.

“Is it you?” The Brown hair gave it away, and the gigantic green balls in the centre of her plump face. But the lop sided n*****s was just the cherry on top

“Mr Gregory told me I should start doing the housework, dressed”

“You clean naked? Since when?”

“That’s not the point” she slumped in her chair “mr Gregory and all of her class has seen madi’s version of me naked”

I looked at the huge t**s on the drawing, holding it up beside her.

“There’s a little difference. Still bare as well, I see”

She snatched the masterpiece from my hand, pushing her glasses up her nose.

“Still the maturity of a little boy, I see”

“I’m not sure what you want me to say, ash. I didn’t tell you to clean naked”

She slammed her hands on the desk, staring at me with her piercing green eyes.

“Tell her she can’t draw her mother naked” the way her Australian accent bleeds through still made her intoxicating.

“Why don’t you tell her?”

“I tried” she bit her lip, my pants getting tighter. It didn’t matter what I did to erase her appeal, she is still the sexiest woman I’ve laid eyes on

“And?”

“She told me that her mum is a beautiful angel and that she likes drawing me. She cried. I told her she can draw me as much as she likes, but with clothes. Then she cried more because she can’t draw clothes. So I said ok”

“So you gave her approval to draw you naked more?”

“She was so upset. She did that lip quiver. I felt like a horrible mother telling her to not draw something she was so proud of”

“So you want me to be the bad guy?” I had no problems telling madi to not draw her mom naked, I didn’t want ash’s larger than life t**s being shown around either. Who is mr Gregory? I don’t think I’ve met him. I’ll add that to my to do list next week when it’s my week.

“Oh please, you can’t do anything wrong in her eyes”

“I’ll speak with her”

“Thank you” she stood rubbing her face in her hands and letting out a long deep breath.

I handed her back her nudes leaving one on my desk. It was by far the best one. If I had to guess it was ash sucking up the cobwebs with the vacuum. But, looked like she was pole dancing. The t**s like massive Ballons hugging the pole.

She snatched it from my desk. Giving me the death stare. Australians were no doubt the most feisty out of the different women i have met over the years. Or Ashley is just one of a kind. Probably the latter.

“I’d like some of madi’s art”

“What for?”

“Frame it and put it Right here” I tapped a bare spot on my desk.

“Oh yeah so you can tell every one that’s who their salaries get processed by?”

“They might start working harder”

“Your a d**k” she said storming out of my office. Not even 2 minutes later Beth walked in holding her imitation designer hand bag over one arm, and a green disgusting looking drink in her hand.

“Did you just vomit in that cup?” I asked her as she kissed my cheek.

“It’s healthy, you should drink it to. It helps with erectile disfunction”

Ok so I had that coming. I hadn’t been able to get hard for her in quiet some time. But considering my b***r just went down, i didn’t have a real issue. It was just simply that, she was just a f**k and it was just a one time thing.

I have no intentions of having a relationship. Some women understand me clearly, others agree prior then afterwards change their minds. Beth is one of them.

I’m only 30, b***r problems I don’t even think are an issue at this age. But I’ll let her think that.

“No thanks. I’d rather a shrivelled little sausage”

“I’ll bring you in some tomorrow. It’s 5pm. Aren’t we going to Mary’s play or training?”

I don’t recall inviting her to Madisons ballet practice next week. If that’s what she was referring to.

The only women in madi’s life will be her mother, that I was 100% sure of.

“No. I have work to do”

“Tell someone else to do it. It’s the best thing about being the boss. Delegate Baby”

I’m impressed she knew such a big word. But soured it with the pet name.

“Beth, listen” I started taking in a long deep breath in hopes this time she will listen “I just don’t have time for a relationship or for you. I’m sorry. Your a lovely girl, I’m sure you will find someone that can give you the time and attention you deserve”

“I’ll wait. It’s ok” she shrugged slurping her thick green gooey cake batter.

“I’ve met someone else” maybe that will work. It’s technically correct. Sarah was just a one time thing. Last months pent up s****l frustration, receiver.

“The frumpy chunky nerd that just left?”

“My wife? Is that who your referring to?”

“Your wife?” She squeaked like it was news to her.

I held up my hand and wiggled my finger. The ring Still firmly there, where it had been for 8 years.

“You never told me you were married” she acted like I was the one in the wrong when I seem to recall her sucking my ring finger and trying to remove the band, with her teeth.

“I did. It’s what you choose to hear, is the problem”

Frumpy? She has her days and it’s mostly outside of work hours when she gets around in her sweat pants. Or naked.

Chunky? well, she isn’t a stick but her curves have always held my attention. Always so soft and cuddly.

Nerd? I couldn’t disagree with. Her new glasses only adding to her geeky nerdiness.

Fuck, I missed her. I completely f****d that up.

I watch her attitude walk in and out my office door. I see the worry in her face, her struggles with being a single mom. I do everything I can to help her. I know she wants to go back to Australia to her family and the only thing I have to keep her here in New York is the threat of taking full custody of madi. I’m an asshole. I created this and now I force her to endure me. In my Defense, how am i meant to see my daughter when she’s on the other side of the world? There’s no way I’d allow that.

“I can see why you look elsewhere”

“Yes, because she hates me. If she didn’t, well we wouldn’t be having this conversation” my patience had started to wear thin “is that all? I have work to do”

Surprisingly she got to her feet with a wobble, her heals clearly giving her grief.

Fake gucci hit me in the shoulder, which I’m sure she aimed for my face but her aim was a little off. I’ll never understand how woman’s bags are so heavy. They carry that weight on their arms all day, one would think they would prefer it to be lighter.

Just as Beth got to the door, it opened, smacking her straight in the face.

Ashley looked horrified, dropping her

Handbag with a thud as it hit the ground. Grabbing Beth’s arm.

“I am so sorry. Are you ok?” She asked.

Beth yanked her arm back and opened her mouth to speak.

“Goodbye Beth” I had to cut her off before she started a fight she would no doubt lose. Ashley had a mean right hook, I should know, I’ve felt it.

Ashley watched her wobble out on her heels, picking up her bag.

“Your here late” I looked at my watch only now noticing school pick up was 2 hours ago. Madi’s art had distracted me from noticing earlier.

“Britt wanted to take her ice skating. She picked her up from school. Do you mind if I ask Britt to take her to you after?”

“Of course not. You left her with Britt?” My sister didn’t have a maternal bone in her body. To say I’m concerned is an understatement.

“She’s fine. Don’t start that bullshit”

“She’s a party animal ash. It’s Friday night”

“She offered. Give her a chance. She adores madi”

The rest of my work can wait until I get home, I’ll head down to ice skating to have a peek. Because she’s my sister doesn’t mean ash had to say yes. It would’ve been a case of not saying no to Britt incase she turned it into more.

“I’ll walk you out” I patted my pockets, pulling my jacket on, wrapping my scarf around my neck, ash crossed her arms beneath her breasts and tapped her finger against her arm “what?”

“Let them have fun”

“I will just drive by and see” I lead her out the door and to the elevator. I knew her better than I knew myself, and the way she kept looking at her watch, checking her phone and swapping which leg she is standing on were fantastic indications she’s hiding something “is there something you want to tell me?”

“Who told you? It literally just happened and you already know? Nothings private here” she rambled. Pissed that someone had already told me about whatever it is that just happened.

Do I pretend I know or admit that I have no idea what she means. Both options had pros and cons.

“Your still my wife, News gets to me fast” I wished that was true. Fact is, ash did nothing out of the ordinary at work so there wasn’t much to be spoken about. But it was a safe reply not admitting I knew or not.

“Is he nice? I had nothing else to do. So I figured why not” she shrugged.

“Who?” I asked a little too quickly.

“What?” She said just as fast, eyes wide realising I had no idea what she was talking about and that she had said too much “no one”

“No one?”

“What?” She looked at the numbers of the elevator dropping, her foot starting to tap as she pressed the button for the car park again.

I glanced at the Emergancy stop, and dove for it at the same time she tried to shift to infront of it.

I hit it, then she hit it. So I hit it again, then she did, the elevator bounced in confusion and then stopped. She spun around and hit it again. Flattening her back against the panel.

“Who’s he?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about” she said watching the numbers.

“You asked if he is nice and that you had nothing better to do so you figured why not. Why not what? And I don’t know if he is nice if I don’t know who he is” I didn’t like where this was going. He is someone obviously that works for me, that much I know, but who? Not sure whether to give him a handshake for having the balls to hit on his bosses wife or kill him. If that’s what he has done, which I’m positive is the case for her to ask if he’s nice.

Which also confirms he is new to her, she didn’t know him well.

“Looks like News doesn’t travel That fast” she smiled.

Next floor, Ashley’s floor. I’ll just have to dig around. Right beside her hip was the 30th floor. Which had already been lit up by someone waiting.

The Doors opened, i gave her a cocky smile, making her face drop. I took a step out of the doors when the person waiting walked in.

“Good evening mr king” the guy said walking into the elevator, smiling as he seen ash.

I slid back between the closing doors, and looked him over as he stared at my wife probably getting a raging b***r as he did.

“Evening” I finally replied.

“Mr king, you remember Dylan from accounting?” She said in a way knowing damn well I had no idea who he is by the way I stared at him in hopes something will kick in soon.

He is either new or his job wasn’t a high enough position for me to deal with.

“I don’t believe we have been introduced” I gave him a hand shake, squeezing his hand nice and firmly. Making sure he feels weak in comparison. I’m positive madi had a firmer grip.

“I’m training in maintaining the financial databases at kings. Rick warren is my coach”

Now that’s a name I’m familiar with. Rick and I went way back. Since college. A value to this company. If there was another like him, I’d be grateful but this guy? Seriously? Not at all who I thought ash would find appealing.

Without sounding cocky, it’s a huge drop from me. I’m rich, successful, I was bachelor of the year before we got married. Im a catch. My parental skills are top notch, there’s not a thing madi misses out on. Ok I may suck at relationships and marriage but it was one stupid mistake. Just one.

“Your in Good hands”

“Definitely. I’m honoured to be given the opportunity to work here” the elevator stopped and he put his hand out to stop the doors closing “great to finally meet you sir. I’ll see you on Monday Ashley”

I could see ash in the corner of my eye with a cocky grin. Ok I may have jumped the gun on this one. One man out of the 700 plus employees working for kings, getting on an elevator didn’t automatically make him the ‘he’.

I wished he was the ‘he’, not at all a threat.

“Ok, who is it?”

“Why’s it matter? Do I care about the women in your life?”

“It’s different. You know you aren’t even in the same league”

Ok so I should’ve thought more before saying that. It made sense to me. She isn’t in the same league. She’s not even in a league, she has no competition and at any time she decides she wants me again, I’d drop everything for her.

“I’m aware. You made that bloody clear when I was trying to figure out motherhood, and you were out partying AND f*****g RABID DOGS!”

I flinched when her rage took over. I didn’t need to look at her to know, she was ready to rip me to threads.

In my Defense i f****d no one, and if the photos never made it to front page of the New Yorker, I would’ve had more luck convincing her that I hadn’t.

“I’m replaceable, you aren’t. That’s why it’s different” I knew that, and the more I tried to fill some of the void, it was evident I couldn’t.

“If only you thought that 4 years ago” she let out a deep breath “I want a divorce”

“Never going to happen” I felt the sweat under my collar. I wasn’t even close to being ready for that.

“I don’t want anything, if that’s what you are concerned about”

“If a divorce was a possibility, which it’s not, I’d give you everything”

“I don’t want anything”

“Great. So it’s settled, no divorce” I smiled at her as the doors opened, she rolled her eyes and pushed past me.

“Don’t forget to speak with madi. See you next week” she swung back around, walking backwards “don’t forget no later than 7:30 bedtime. Unfortunately she has your temper in the mornings”

I loved how fiery she can get and then just go back to normal. Dr Jekyll and mr Hyde.

We both knew, it was not my temper she inherited. It didn’t matter how great of a sleep either of them had, they were just not morning people.

I grabbed my keys from my pocket, looking away for a split second. Just to look back to Ashley lifting herself up of the ground.

“Don’t say a word” she said hanging her bag back over her shoulder.

I put my hands up in a peace offering, unlocking my car. Trying hard to not laugh at her clumsiness. Which seemed to never improve.

Ashley

I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard on a date. My cheeks were killing me. Everyone in the Restuarant looked at us like we were idiots, but when Brett started laughing, I couldn’t help but laugh.

The only problem was i wasn’t laughing with him, but at him. I had never heard such a wail of a laugh. It wasn’t cute, no. It was… I didn’t even know how I was to explain it if I had to.

Was it a squeal? Or a wail? One thing I knew it was, is dreadfully contagious.

I’m not even sure what he was saying, but I’m positive I’ll never be back to this Restuarant.

He is charming, attractive and can hold a conversation. He wanted to know about madi, which is a major plus. But then he laughed.

I wanted him to stop laughing, but every time I thought I calmed him down, I’d laugh and he would start back up again.

When I seen him waiting for me Monday morning with coffee, I couldn’t help the giggle when I said thank you.

Anyone walking by would say it was a smitten giggle and would label it as a budding romance. But no far from it.

I forced the coffee down as he talked, being polite, saying the coffee was delicious. Except, it wasn’t lactose free.

I could taste it on the first sip but I didn’t want to be rude for such a sweet gesture. My stomach started to churn as I clenched my bum cheeks together.

“Are you ok?” He asked.

I could hardly say I’m about to s**t myself, so I nodded wiping the little beads of sweat on my forehead.

“I think I’m getting sick” I excused myself and tried to walk to the bathroom as normal as possible.

“Just the person im After” Blake Said stepping off the elevator as I finally reached the bathroom doors.

I had no time for a chit chat. He noticed my urgency and continued down the hall to the offices.

I got back to my desk with Blake sitting in my chair and his feet up on my paperwork and staring at the roof.

“Make yourself at home”

I fell on the couch along the wall rubbing my belly, I’m sure he would’ve been ok if I said I’m sorry but I can’t drink it. But like an i***t, I drank it.

“You look dreadful ash. Are you ok?” He watched me, dropping his feet to the ground.

“Brett brought me a coffee” I mumbled, leaning forward to stop the ach “I felt rude not drinking it”

I didn’t have to explain, Blake bought me several normal coffees in the first week as well, and the aftermath was the worse.

“Go home. Get some rest”

“I’ve got things to do, the worst will pass soon”

“No, you can go home” he lifted me to my feet, hanging my bag over my shoulder.

“So Brett?” He said, I just nodded. I couldn’t be bothered playing games with him today “you think the coffee is bad, wait until you hear him laugh”

Of course Blake knew about his laugh, why wouldn’t he. At some point I’m sure something laugh worthy has been said.

“I’ve heard his laugh” I cannot possibly unhear it. Just thinking of it again made me giggle “it is unique”

“Unique? That’s a positive way of looking at it”

“How are you feeling?” Brett said walking into my office.

Brett looked up from his papers, taking in his surroundings, Blake being down on this level was very rare. Confusion crossed his features, with a slight look of worry.

“Mr king, I hadn’t expected you on this floor, apologies for the interruption” brett said shaking Blake’s hand “is there something I can help with?”

“Ash will be going home, can someone take over for her today?”

“I’m sure I can get that organised” still confused on why Blake cares evident “I’ll take over from here sir. Your a busy man”

“Not today” Blake said, standing straight sizing Brett up. Why he insisted on making my life difficult, i don’t know. He didn’t need to be imposing, his presence alone does that.

He stood a whole foot taller than us both, making us both feel like midgets. I’ve always felt like a midget next to him though, I’m not a little person, but he made me feel tiny. I can’t complain, it was the only time I felt skinny. No need to diet.

Brett lacked most of what Blake had. They both had blue eyes, bretts were dull but still eye catching, Blake’s were nearly grey but they were intoxicating, you could get lost in Blake’s eyes, I had been a lot.

Bretts hair combed to perfection, Blake’s looked like he had just got out of bed, a little fluffy at the back from the pillow. But as the big guy here, he didn’t really have a dress code. I’m sure bed hair would be appealing on most men.

Was Bretts laugh really a deal breaker? I’d never find another Blake. He’s a cocky asshole, that struggles to control his d**k, but I can’t deny theres no one quite like him. No one even half as appealing. In Everything, Not Just his looks.

I’ll be single forever if I compared them all to him. But is being single all that bad? Not at all and I think I’d rather stay independent.

“Ok, I’ll get some coverage. Rest up” Brett said rubbing my arm, I forced a smile acting tough, even though my intestines felt like they were dancing.

“Thank you Brett”

“It’s my pleasure” he winked walking back out.

Blake scoffed.

“Don’t start” I mumbled readjusting my bag “he is a nice guy”

“Not Your Type at all. He’s already tried to kill you and it’s only been a few days”

“You did the same thing” he seems to not remember when he brought me a coffee, 3 days in a row, wiping me out for nearly a week. All because I felt rude if I didn’t drink it. Obviously being my boss at the time, I was a little scared rejecting the sweet thought from a man that to everyone who worked for him, was an asshole.

Of course, my opinion shifted to the same as theirs after some time.

“You never said anything about an intolerance to dairy”

“I never told him either”

“What’s he buying you a coffee for anyway? Already taking the next step?”

“It’s just a coffee. A sweet gesture actually”

“No it’s a ‘I want to f**k you’ gesture. I know how men think”

“Just because that’s why you buy women coffee doesn’t mean all men do that. Some are actually genuine”

He looked at me like I had grown a second head.

“I’ve only bought you coffee, and well we now have Madi”

“Blake, must we discuss the hidden meaning of coffee while I’m trying to rein in my bowels?” My face went skew as my gut grumbled.

Blake’s eyeballs nearly fell from their sockets, probably with the fear of me exploding.

“Right” his hand on my back he walked me out of my office and to the elevator “have a nice relaxing shower, you look all clammy”

“Thanks” I mumbled walking into the doors, holding my hand up as he went to enter “I’m going down, you need an up elevator”

“Yes but I’d like to make sure you don’t combust before you make it to your car”

“I’ll make it to my car” I rolled my eyes, as he ignored me and pressed the button for the car park.

The Doors closed and I watched him in the reflection of the door, hands in his pockets moving back and forth. Heels, toes, heels, toes.

“Oh” he said making me jump. It’s bad enough that my ass is on fire, scaring me wasn’t helping the situation.

“You want me to s**t myself?” I growled, bending over so my belly hurt less.

“Definitely not. I just remembered why I came to see you. I spoke with Madi about your nudes”

“Great” I groaned. Nudes weren’t a priority right at this moment.

“She cried” he let out a deep breath “She did that cute little sobbing thing she’s learnt, you know the one where the lip hangs out like bubba from Forrest Gump”

“You felt horrible, didn’t you?”

“I did. I’ve lost the moment she looks at me with those sad little eyes. She knows it too”

I let out a defeated breath finally reaching the car park.

“Guess it’s my last week of cleaning naked” I joked.

Knowing his mind would’ve been going into overdrive with the thought.

“Or just don’t do it when she’s awake. Maybe every second week you can clean naked when she’s at mine”

“Maybe mr Gregory might ask me out for dinner” I said stepping out of the elevator “I guess the drawings could help”

“I’ll try again tonight” he said as the elevator doors closed.

Mr Gregory was probably married, and if not then a drawing of my large completely over exaggerated boobs is hardly a turn on. He did have a little blush happening when he handed me the drawings, saying they are nice but inappropriate.

As nice looking as he is, I really don’t think I’m wanting a man. Sure they have their uses. But they are mostly more trouble than not. I’ve dated 2 men and I’ve ended up with the shits. Yes, I could always prevent this by saying I can’t drink what they have wasted their money on to impress me, but i don’t want to hurt their feelings.

My week got worse as it continued. I stood by my car leaning against the roof as I waited for Blake to answer.

“What’s wrong?” He asked the moment he answered the phone. Ok so I don’t call him much, or at all unless it’s an emergency and this was. I didn’t know what to do.

“I need you to come down to the car park” I knew I was never going to hear the end of this. I’ve never quite got a hang of driving on the wrong side of the road.

“Ok” he cautiously said, hearing his office door close not long after “what have you done?”

“Well, I misjudged the things that protect the people walking down the path, next to the car park. You know those metal fences?”

The only Good thing going for me at the moment was it was an undercover car park and in the back corner. No innocent bystanders or rubber neckers.

“Getting in the elevator” he cut out not long after.

I chewed my nails as I waited. Rick pulling up a few parks down, getting out of his car slowly, his mouth slightly ajar as he closed his door.