The Life of Zara

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

I snuggle deeper into the pillow and sighed in content. Soo warm and comforting.

What??

Since when did my pillow has a hand? And a hand on my waist? I closed my eyes for a moment remembering the memories of last night. Why do we have to end up like this? I slowly and carefully took his hand off me and slid out of bed. I tip toed to the toilet trying not to make a sound. Once I closed the door I pressed my back to the wall trying to think of what just happened. I peeped through the window and it's already morning. That means we missed the morning prayer. i quickly took care of my hygiene brushed and did ablution. I dreaded opening the door since he is still in my bed. I know it will be awkward and embarrassing waking him up. Or will it not? Perhaps he will be mad at me? Or he will not? What am I supposed to say? Hey wake up?

I made a bold move ending my thought and opened the door.

Relief.

Relief

Relieved

He's out of bed and definitely out of the room. He saved me an episode and I'm more than grateful for that. I quickly changed into my praying gown and took my hijab. Just as I was spreading the mat Ahmed knocked and came in before I even answered.

"Lets pray together." I missed the mosque. I stood behind him and he lead us through our two Rakats. It was peaceful and comforting. It reminded me of when our dad will lead us during the nights of Ramadan.

After praying he turned towards me. I lower my head unable to look at him.

"Zara.. "

"Na'am (yes)"

"Lift up your head. I want to talk to you."

I raised my head to look at his black orbs.

"Zara, I want to thank you for opening up to me. For forgiving me when I don't even deserve your forgiveness. For showing me kindness after I have been cruel to you." He spoke calmly and clearly with so much emotion in his eyes.

He shifted and held both of my hands in his making me give him all of my attention.

"You are a strong and brave woman. I admire your courage and strength that you leave me in awe. That you leave me respecting you."

"If I say I know or can imagine your pain then I'm lying to you. I don't know how much you hurt or how much you are hurting. But you should not let what happened take over your life or control how you live your life. "

"Take it as a trial, a test from Allah. You should live your life happily and pray for your re union. Allah has reason for everything he does and he has a reason for whatever happened to you. You have to be patient through it all."

"Your mom and brother must not have sent you here because they want to. But, because they want you to have a happy and normal life. What's the point of there sacrifice when you are not happy? When you are constantly worrying?"

"Zara, you know that Allah is good and he will be good to you. He is in control and he will take care of your of your parents."

"When he wishes someday somehow he will bring you back to them. He has his ways. Have faith in him and let him take care of you and your affairs."

"It's not good to get depressed."

"Do the things you want to."

"Live the life you want to."

"Smile and laugh a genuine smile. Not the fake once and empty looks you give."

"Fill the missing void in your heart with other good things God gave you."

"When time comes to meet your parents. Don't let them look at you and regret ever sending you."

"But let them be happy and not regret the choice of sending you here."

"Be like the girl in that picture. Lively and beautiful and chubby." He finished with a warm smile looking at me expectantly.

I stared at him. He look like an angel send from above to lighten up my world. I have never looked at my situation from his perspective. I see my situation in a completely new light.

"Thank you." I mumbled. Trying to stop the tears that are demanding to be let out.

I looked at him letting my eyes tell him how much what he told me means to me and how much I'm going to try.

He nodded his head in understanding and smiled.

"Let's go cook breakfast. We have somewhere to go. They will be expecting us by 09:00am."

"Where are we going?"

"The orphanage. He stated scratching his head. That's if you are okay with it."

"I want you to visit them and take something to them. It's good to help the needy and poor. Allah will also help us with our problems."

The way he said our problems. Meant my parents. Our? My problems are his?

I stared at the window watching cars past by and people going on with there routines.

"And you need to be more social."

"Huh?" I asked turning to look at him.

He answered eyes on the road.

"You are always alone so you would always be thinking."

"You need to meet more people?"

'Join some Islamic school or something? What ever you like and you can meet new friends."

"Ahh Adeel's wife Jidda." He smiled like he won a trophy. "You should meet each other. He's my cousin. They got married the same month we did. I should introduce you two."

I smiled at his effort. "I'll love that."

"And sometime we should go on a vacation."

"We can even visit my father."

I started laughing. What started from a small smile turn to a full laughter?

"Hey. What's funny? Anything I should know?"

"You.. Actually.."

"You actually.. Look.. Like.. Like a blabberin.. Robot." I manged between laughter.

"What?" He almost shouted. "I don't look like a robot." he tried to frown but failed miserably and we ended up laughing together.

"We are here."

The time at the orphanage is something I'll add to my list of good memories. It's easy to smile and talk to this bunch of happy kids. Some didn't even have the chance of ever meeting there parents. And here they are happy and thankful for the life they got.

We walked along the corridor checking out the rooms with the girls giggling and laughing each happy to show her bed.

We entered another room. "This is my bed. I made it in the morning." Anna pointed jumping excitedly." And this mine." The little girl sat on her small bed. "And this is ours." the twins showed a small upstairs bunk.

"It's beautiful."

I rock the baby on my shoulder back and forth. They said she's only six months. She's the cutest baby. With her shiny black hair and round face. Her mouth is soo small and she's the most adorable baby.

"Yasmeen....Baby yasmeen" I cooed.

"Do you want to see my painting?" One of the twins asked. Attempting to drag Ahmed.

"She shows everyone her painting." The elder woman smiled. You can see the love she has for this kids just by the way she looks at them.

I can't remember her name but she's one of the people who take care of them. They call her mother.

"How many kids do you have here?"

"We have about 25 all together with the adults."

I nodded my head.

I turned to see Ahmed surrounded by the kids as they showed him there paintings and beads making. There are almost kids of every age the youngest being yasmeen.

"Can I hold her?" Ahmed asked.

I nodded my head. She's already extending her hands towards him giving him a smile that had her drooling.

"Right! I like you too yasmeen." He chuckled taking her in his arms.

They look cute. A very handsome man holding an adorable baby is a sight to see.

"You should take a picture you look good together."

"Really?" He took out his phone and handed it to me and I snapped a picture of them.

"You should take one with them." The mother smiled extending her hands and I reluctantly gave her the phone.

I stood near Ahmed and he immediately put his hands around my shoulder.

"Smile mana she insisted."

We smiled as she took pictures.

We took many pictures with the twins and all the other kids.

She took us around the Compound with the kids following around excitedly.

She showed us there classes. Which is only for nursery kids. The work house where kids learn skills. The smaller kids are mostly doing soap and detergent making. The elder ones doing mainly tailoring bead makings and other skills.

"Time for sweets." and they all yelled excitedly. I gave them the sweets and Ahmed and a few workers went to get the things we brought including bag of rice, maize and salt. A cartoon of spaghetti, macaroni, Maggi. Milk, milo and soap.

We said our goodbyes with the kids asking us if we will come again and the staffs thanking Ahmed.

"We have somewhere else to go before we head home." He said as we entered the car.

"How do you like the orphanage?" he asked.

"The best in forever! I grinned."

"Thank you!"

"It's my pleasure." He grinned back.