The Lycan Kings Princess

Aria 2

POV Aria

Beep....Beep

It's the steady sound that pulls me slowly from the foggy haze of darkness.

I ache all over and my head feels heavy. I wonder briefly if this is what death is, then again...I don't think death has a persistent beeping sound going off. I manage to will my eyes to crack open and the light instantly hurts. It's dim in the room and the fireplace offers what little light there really is. It crackles gently and warms the room up, making me feel slightly better despite the obvious goosebumps littering my skin. I felt a weight against my leg and glanced down to see my mother with her head on my thigh, her brown hair braided messily and her eyes closed. She's gripping my hand firmly as though if she were to let go I would disappear in a second.

I turn my head slightly and see a heart monitor and an I.V. drip next to my bed. It takes a moment for me to recall what happened.

I got my wolf and Carson was my mate.

We rejected each other, mutually but...

I felt a pang in my heart, it hurt so bad. Why did it hurt? Carson loved Elaine and I wasn't about to let a matebond come between them. Carson had felt that too. He had been the first to speak and I saw the pain in his eyes when he had to do it. It was probably the same pain I felt. I have heard that it hurts worse for females to be rejected than it was for the males.

Point proven.

I was...positive I was dying, so why was I here? in my bed with my mother watching over me? Had I not perished on the forest floor? I was so confused.

"Ma...-" I cough slightly, my throat hurts, the sound coming out in a terrible scratchy rasp. I realize how thirsty I am despite the I.V. currently attached to my arm. I settled for reaching out a heavy hand to touch the top of my Mother's head, stroking her soft hair to grasp her attention, "Ma..." I tried again.

I'm happy when I see her stir, but I feel guilty too at the dark circles that are clearly under her eyes. How long have I been like this?

My mother lifts her head and rubs her eyes gently while still gripping my hand that has an I.V. in it. It takes her a second to realize I'm starring at her before she bursts into tears and hugs me tightly, practically lying on top of me. "Oh Aria! my little songbird! I'm so glad you're awake! I thought we had lost you forever!" she rattles on practically sobbing into my hair, which, mind you, does not feel very good at the moment. In fact, I feel like I haven't bathed in a month.

"What's going on mama? Didn't I die...." I asked, my voice really does sound terrible and I received a look of horror from my mother.

"No! And thank the Moon goddess you didn't!" she sits back but never lets go of me really, "Your father and I found you passed out on the forest floor nearly dead Aria. We rushed you home to get you treatment. You were barely breathing."

Good to know, I felt like I was suffocating.

"You.....You shouldn't have run off like that, Aria, so much happened in such a short amount of time. no one could process anything, you and poor Carson oh goodness." She shakes her head and I feel like I was missing something.

"Is he okay?" I asked, grabbing at my throat with my free hand.

My mother catches on and pours me a cup of cold ice water, offering it to me and helping me drink it.

That feels much better.

"Your father is very angry right now...Carson passed out almost immediately after you ran off," she explained, "Though he came to sooner than you did, there's been a lot of yelling between your father and Beta Yulson." she said looking sympathetic, "They've both been hounding Carson on why he would ever reject you, and he just looks like he's completely checked out of his mind." I feel guilty instantly.

"It's not Carson's fault." I rasped and took another drink of the water, "We rejected each other.' even if it had almost killed me too, I still feel pain, but its no where as awful as the other night.

"Aria, my sweet, why would you be so understanding? It's okay if you feel upset with him for doing this to you. It's been almost an entire week since we found you, I was so scared." My mother states and I feel both shocked and appalled. A week?! I can't believe it's been that long, but my mother's words make me worry and fret.

"No! Mama, He rejected me because he's in love with Elaine and I rejected him because he wants her as his mate!" I winced as I rubbed my throat, a week and I was still this raspy?

"Things change with the mating bond Aria, it's not about play-" I feel bad as I interrupt my mothers explanation but I can't let everyone think Carson's a bad guy because of a rejection, No matter how agonizing it had (and still slightly does) felt. "Mama, I don't want Carson to be my mate! he told me he was going to ask Elaine after my birthday, I don't want to get between them because some bond says we're supposed to be together!"

"And what about you, Aria? You almost died! What about your feelings? There's no going back from a rejection." My mother tells me and I know she is right, but I stand firm.

"I know. I know mama, but Carson and I didn't know that we would be bonded. Heck, I didn't even have hope of getting my wolf, I don't blame him." Okay, maybe I blamed him for opening his mouth in front of everyone at the party. "I love Carson, but I love him as a friend." another pang rattled my heart. "It doesn't mean I want to mate him." My wolf would strongly disagree but I wasn't going to change my mind. This lingering pain wouldn't disappear and it was very depressing. I'm trying to convince myself it doesn't hurt though. "Tell dad not to be mad at Carson, please?" I begged.

Carson doesn't deserve to be yelled at for something beyond his control.

It's best. I decided that he and I don't have any contact for a while. It's better if we let this slip away into nothing while being apart.

I really should message Elaine though to tell her I'm not mad or angry with her. I truly deeply want her and Carson to be happy no matter how much it hurts me. Rejections a b***h, but I don't want it to ruin our friendships.

My mother sighs, "Aria, I was so scared....why are you such a good girl? I wish you would be selfish for once." she said as she kissed my forehead, "I wouldn't be your daughter if I was like that." I pointed out and she smiles stroking my face, "You're right." she agreed before standing up.

"I'll get the doctor, he wanted to see you the moment you woke up." My mother lifts herself from the bed and straightens her wrinkled clothes and tries to fix her hair into something presentable. I feel bad, my mother, in all her years as the pack Luna has never looked anything less than perfect. "I'll run you a bath after he sees you."

Now that, I am grateful for. I can smell everything now with my heightened senses and I do not like how I smell.

"I'll have the kitchen make you something light to eat as well, I'm sure you're starving." with a tender kiss on my forehead, my mother walked to the door. I think perhaps she forgot she could mind link everyone and tell them I was awake, that or she was to tired to remember.

"I love you Mama." I called after a moment and before she fully left the room. I was afraid that I would never get to say it again, so I want to say it now. I get a warm smile back and a reassurance she won't be long.

"I love you too, Aria." and she closed the door behind her.

I'm left there with nothing else but the monitor and my thoughts.

It then strikes me, I'm not alone anymore...

I take a moment and slowly reach out into my mind. I've never done this before so I don't know what exactly to do, but I know this...

I have questions for Aeris.

It certainly takes me longer than I anticipated and for the briefest of moments I wondered if it had all been a dream, but I know I shifted. Aeris doesn't respond to me right away but I feel her there. She feels just as I feel. Terrible.

'Aeris, are you there?''I am here.'

Her response draws a sigh of relief from me, I really did get my wolf. Too bad her grand moment had been ruined so spectacularly.

'Are....Are you okay?' I ask the question as if I didn't already know. Aeris feels just as much heartbreak as I do and I'm trying to convince myself it's for the best, but the mate bond keeps clouding and jumbling up my emotions.

'I'm hurt....our mate doesn't want us, you don't want our mate, I don't understand why...'

Of course, that was the reason she hurt and I knew it was going to be far more difficult to explain things to Aeris, who had not been around until just a week ago. 'Aeris..I love Carson, but not as a mate, he has someone he loves and I just can't possibly come between that, these feelings I have now....they aren't....they're not the feelings I really felt towards him, he's my bestfriend and I support him in his choices...even if it hurts It will go away.'

I can tell she isn't convinced by the way she huffs in my mind, she is naïve about the relationship I shared with Carson and Elaine.

'Perhaps the moon goddess will bless us with a new mate one day...' It would take time for the mate bond to fully subside, but it wasn't unheard of to find a second chance mate

'Rare' Aeris sniffles in my head and I know she is right.

There is always hope, I tell myself.

---------

The doctor comes and he checks me out. It's Doctor Finch. He's an older werewolf and has been serving the Knightengale family for three generations at this point. He's practically ancient if I have to put a date on him. He's quite sturdy for his age though, nearly eighty years old and he looks like a man who just stepped out of a movie. His hair is slightly graying and he has a little stubble around his face. He looks as though he could be forty.

He's always been nice to me and encouraging.

"Well, despite needing some bed rest and recovery time, you seem to be in good health." He explained, going over all his findings, "but I don't suggest you go out searching for Carson. Perhaps a little separation is good considering everything that happened." he said and I nodded in agreement.

"I was planning on it, it's too soon." I receive a pat on the head and pout at Dr Finch, who raises his hands in surrender,

"You're a smart girl, Aria, and I know I don't have to tell you that," he said lightly before smiling, "Now about your wolf...how is she? No one got a good look at your shift, so I'm flying blind here."

I nodded softly, "She's weak and upset." I answered, wringing my hands gently, "She's mad and doesn't understand why I would agree to Carson's rejection." It feels surreal to talk about my wolf, "She's resting right now." I can almost hear her steady breathing in my mind.

"Good,, Good...when you're able to get up, I would really like to have a look at her just to make sure everything is okay," he takes my hand, rubbing soothing circles on the back with his thumb, "You've been through so much in such a short time so don't go rushing yourself okay. I'll come back tomorrow to check on you. Just take it easy." He says before standing up.

"Thank-you Doctor Finch." I waved to him gently and he just continued to smile, giving me a bow of his head before making his exit. I took a pause before calling out, "Dr.Finch!?"

He pops his head back in the room in question, his expression one of immediate concern, but I have to ask, "Does it...always hurt like that when you shift?" I can recall the pain of my body twisting, everything burning, and breaking. I don't want to go through that consistently if I am to shift in the future.

I'm a little relieved when he laughs gently, "No, It usually only hurts like that the first time, but you'll get used to it." he grins, "It will be like putting on a second skin the more you do it, but no need to rush Aria...you've got time." with that he disappears and closes the door behind me.

I lean back against the pillows and sigh out gently, the I.V. still in my hand until the fatigue goes away. I'm still a little shocked at everything that has occurred.

--------

It didn't take long for my mother to return to the room with a tray in her hands. There was some chicken broth soup, orange jello, and flat ginger ale. It's very little and I'm glad, even though my stomach is growling, I don't want to really eat anything, especially heavy foods. "Here you are my little songbird." my mother says tenderly as she sets the tray on my lap and fluff's my pillows behind me to give a little support, "You eat that and I'll get the bath ready for you, I'm sure you want to get clean."

She's right, my hair feels awful, not in the normal way, there's dirt in my hair and, despite my mother's best efforts to remove it while I slept, there are little blades of grass and moss. My skin also feels disgusting. I was definitely sponge bathed while I slept, but I can see from the dingy sheets and blankets my mother couldn't fully clean me in my unconscious state. The food is pretty bland, maybe a little salty, but it does wonders for my aching and hungry stomach. I realize I didn't even eat any of my birthday cake.

When I finish, my mother comes back and helps me up out of bed onto shaky legs and I'm truly thankful she is our Luna and my mother. She's always so caring for everyone, no matter who. I've been told she is even better than my late grandma. I can tell how heightened my senses have become the moment we enter the bathroom, I'm assaulted by so many new and familiar scents. The clawfoot bathtub is filled full, I can smell the rose oil and bubble bath before I actually get close enough, two empty buckets are placed at the head of the tub with a little padded stool that my mother clearly intends to sit on and I am once again filled with gratitude for her. I'm lucky...I really am.

She helps me with my pajamas and tosses them into the hamper for later. She would have staff come to get it and wash everything. I cannot help the groan of appreciation that escapes me as I sink into the tub, the hot water covering my muscles with much needed warmth. I'm careful not to submerge my hand with the I.V. in it. Once I settled down, I heard my mother settle behind me, her hand reaching out to grasp all my hair and to lean my head back on the bath pillow so all my hair fell into the first bucket. She then grabs the silver shower nozzle attached to the tub and quickly adjusts the temperature.

"Aria, close your eyes love." she says tenderly, and I am quick to obey her. Moments later, the warm water begins to spill over my head, droplets and rivers of water running over my scalp and down behind my ears. A few trails find their way down my face and neck. It feels incredible. I won't complain about being pampered and doted on this time. I love my mother's touch and it goes a very long way to soothe the ache that persists in my chest. I feel tears spring up behind my closed eyelids and I can't help but tilt my head back into the water a little more. It covers the tears that escape involuntarily and I try to suppress my whimpers. If my mother hears me, she doesn't say anything. She just continues to wash my hair slowly with the apple blossom soap I love so much. Her fingers rub my scalp and make sure she doesn't miss a single inch of my hair. She repeats this process a couple of times before she adds the conditioner and then rinses my hair in the second bucket.

The first bucket is soapy and filled with murky, disgusting water.

I feel like she has washed away the memory of my birthday with that simple little bucket.

She leaves me to wash, shave, and do whatever else I have to in order to feel somewhat like myself again. When I was ready, my mother was back as though she had hovered by the bathroom door until I was finished. She helps me from the bath and I dry off and get dressed. I'm wearing my favorite satin pajamas. They are a light sky blue, the pants stop just above my calf and are very flowy, the top is just a nice tank with spaghetti straps and a white lace sweet heart neck line. Its very comfortable and breathable. I'm then sad down in front of the mirror and my mother takes her time blow drying my long locks. My hair comes to just above my butt, so it's a lot of hair. It takes a good twenty minutes, but when my mother is done it looks shiny and smooth, the ends of my hair becoming wavy. By the time I finally make it back to bed, the sheets and blankets have been swapped out for new ones. It's a soft sea foam green with white accompanying seashell pillow cases.

I crawl back into bed and sigh, I am tired again, I can barely hold any sort of conversation and I'm just glad my mother has kept the chatter to a bare minimum. She hooks up my I.V. again to the machine and I'm then tucked in.

I barely register much else as she hums a song and I'm able to drift off, this time into a proper sleep.

---------

It was about a week later that I heard the knock on my bedroom door.

I am able to move about now. No longer confined to my bed, but I can't muster the courage or strength to leave my room. My mother and father are my frequent visitors aside from the staff and Dr. Finch. I feel like I've convinced myself if I open the door I'll be forced to face all the things I'm not ready to face. I've had entertainment though. My father had a television installed above the fireplace along with a subscription to any streaming platform I could possibly think of. I've also been playing my Cello and Violin. It's probably gotten pretty depressing, because I've actually gotten a few slips of paper slid under my door now and then with a request for a more upbeat melody.

I've received a couple of visits from Beta Yulson, he's come with flowers and unending apologies. I keep assuring him I'll be okay and not to punish Carson who, as requested, has kept his distance. He hasn't even attempted to come by my room or to text me. I still feel a tugging of the mate bond but its fading day by day. The pain is growing less, not that I haven't cried over it a few times. It's only natural, I'm giving up the mate chosen for me by the moon goddess. Of course it will hurt.

I've been texting Elaine, she is apologetic too. I don't know how many times I can assure everyone I'll be okay. I know in the end that Carson will still be my friend and I will be his. His love for Elaine is genuine. I mean common...how could it not be? He rejected me, even knowing that if he had become my mate, he would eventually become the next Alpha of Evergreen. He rejected me despite the pack being handed to him on a silver platter. It's....it's true love. Not that ours wouldn't have been, but...well I don't need to think about it much more.

My room feels stuffy, as though it's getting smaller by the day.

So the knock on my door startles me. No one really knocks unless they are the staff and I have already dismissed the last person for the evening. Beta Yulson and my Father are busy with some plans for the Alpha summit coming up next week an my mother never bothers to knock.

I'm not sure who it could be, but before I could open my mouth and ask who was there, I heard his voice through the door.

"Ari...It's me."

Carson...

A sad expression covers my features and I walk over to the door but I don't open it. I swallow softly and reach out, I knock on the door to let him know I hear him and I am there. I don't trust my own voice right now not to betray me.

"Ari I'm so sorry....I...I wasn't thinking it happened so fast...I embarrassed you and hurt you." He sounds so sad and I really wish I could open the door to comfort him. I'm afraid though, if I do, if I look into his eyes, the mate bond that was slowly disappearing would come back a hundred times worse than it already was. "I shouldn't have said what I said in front of all those people, I don't blame you if you hate me."

I can't help the angry bang that comes from me when I hit the door to reprimand him for ever thinking I could hate him. He is right though, he was an i***t for not waiting to reject me in private.

"Sorry." he knew what I meant from the bang, that's the best part about Carson. He just gets me and no words are needed between us usually. " I was scared we lost you, everyone's telling me to give you space but I had to clear things up Ari...I don't want to lose you as a friend." I can't help the smile that covers my face as I turn to press my back to the door and slid down to sit. I'm pretty sure he is doing that same thing on the opposite side of the door.

"Elaine and I talked, we're going to put our relationship on hold for now, just until the mate bond is gone....I don't want to hurt her or you." He's struggling just as much as I am and I can see that now. He's thoughtful. If things had been different, Carson would have made an amazing alpha to the pack. I gently tapped on the door to let him know my approval of his decision. He has my support. I hear a gentle chuckle as he takes a shaky breath. "Goddess, Ari....I feel like my heart's trying to rip itself out of my chest, I can only imagine the hell you went through...that you're going through."

I know he means well, but he's right...it does hurt, it hasn't stopped hurting. Him being here is enough to both calm me and make me feel like I am going to break down all at the same time.

"I guess, what I'm trying to say is...when its over, when we're better..." I hear him groan as though just saying the words are tough, "I'll always be here for you to lean on, you're my best friend."

Best Friend

It brings a whole new wave of tears to my eyes and I'm both grateful and sad that he's still thinking about our friendship. I take shaky breath and swipe at my eyes trying to stop the tears that have begun to flow down my cheeks without a care, "You're my bestfriend too." I managed to choke out.

We sat like that for a while with our backs to my bedroom door. I can hear him breathe and shuffle now and then. We don't say anything else because nothing else needs to be said. Eventually, I hear Beta Yulson calling Carson and I hear him get up from the opposite side of the door.

"Sleep well Troll."

I want to laugh but I feel like it would hurt too much.

"Sure, whatever loser." I called back.

My room suddenly feels bigger than it does stuffy.

-------

"Aria, dear."

My dad's voice startles me out of whatever stupor I've been in for the last three hours. I've been starring at the wall for a while now, my pen hanging limply from my full lips as I try to think of the notes for the song I am trying and failing at composing. I turn my gaze towards him and see him coming into my bedroom, two white chocolate mocha's in his hands from Starbucks are in his hands and I almost giggled. Of course, he would drive the hour into town to get us the drinks from my favorite store. He's funny looking for a delivery man dressed in a navy blue Armani suit.

"Hi daddy." It's the way I call him when we are not in front of company, or other pack members. He wouldn't have it any other way either.

"Here you go." he placed one of the mochas on the table in front of me, careful not to place it on any of my sheet paper.

"What do I owe the pleasure of you coming into my office?" I jokingly said taking my drink which is still surprisingly hot. Even if the whipped cream has already melted into my drink.

My dad took a seat at one of the chairs surrounding my circular table and smiles at me, "Your mother and I have talked, you need to get out of this room." he said making my heart plummet into my stomach. I don't think I'm ready to face our pack yet, or Carson for that matter.

"Daddy I-"

My father holds up his hand before I can say anything more and finishes his train of thought. "So, we think it's a good idea if you attend the Alpha summit this year with your mother and I."

My jaw nearly drops but I compose myself just as quickly, "The alpha summit?" I've never been to it but I've heard it's held at a castle somewhere in the next province over. It included all the packs that occupied Canada. Every alpha would be there along with the Lycan royals. They oversaw all our little packs and helped when there were disputes about territory. It happened once a year and often was uneventful, but there was always a chance for excitement. To hear my father wanted me to attend...

It sounded perfect, distance would do me some good. I needed to get out of here. My father was right. The opportunity to go away to recover and maybe not see Carson's face was a guaranteed chance to do some healing. Maybe I would even get to meet a Lycan royal...I had never met one up close but I had heard they were very beautiful. They were powerful too, and it was never a good idea to cross their paths and make them angry.

"Yes, you're eighteen now, and this packs future Luna" My father had always been adamant that whoever I took as a mate would become the future Alpha, that seemed like a pipe dream at the moment though. I continued to listen, regardless of my own personal thoughts. "It's a benefit for you to attend, you'll learn a lot more from the other pack Luna's I am positive," he stated nodded.

"Yeah I want to go, when do we leave?" I just needed to get Dr. Finch's approval to travel. It's been nearly two weeks since I woke up from my near death experience.

"We'll depart tomorrow morning, so don't fret, just worry about packing." My father informs me before standing up, "You'll love it dear, it's going to be a really wonderful experience for you and you'll get a chance to properly stretch your wolfs legs this time."

I hadn't let Aeris shift since that first night, but the invitation to shift and run freely had her tail wagging in my head excitedly.

What's the worse that could happen? Surely not anything like what we've been through already.

"Okay, thank-you," I say as my father leans down to kiss my forehead, "I'll see you at dinner?" I question.

"Yes, we'll see you for dinner," he assures and I sit back in my chair feeling a little more weight lifting of my chest. Excitement creeps in and I tell myself again...

What's the worst that could happen?

I don't know it yet, but I really should stop asking questions that I don't want answers too.