Three hours later I was sitting in a café downtown in the gay village. I had walked to a bus-stop and taken a bus to the subway, and from there downtown. I was now two blocks from my shared apartment. I had gone there initially, but when I had entered the building’s lobby, I found myself disinclined to go up. Instead, I had walked around the familiar downtown streets—to clear my head.
Unfortunately, there hadn’t been much clearing. Instead, I experienced the city as something alien, like I was in a foreign country. I circled back to the gay village, hoping that there at least I would find a familiar sense of belonging. I had been in this café many times, but as I sat here now, I still felt a sense of being—what?
Displaced, lost? Exiled! That was it. I sat here now, feeling incapable of f
