Lavender

Pack a Bag

Episode 3

Pack a Bag

I'm trying to block them out and focus on the pitiful lunch in front of me, but I keep hearing bits and pieces of the loud conversation that's mostly one-sided, meaning Dean's side. "...what Rose would've wanted... be my wife... not prepared... the life she's going..." Man, you suck at blocking things out Gwen. I put my headphones back in and attempt to slow my heart while I pick at the food.

Some time has passed, and they're still going strong in this conversation. My dad must've said something Dean didn't like because I see fast motion in my periphery. I look up just in time to witness this gorgeous man pick my dad up, I mean completely off the ground, by his shirt. It seems like Dean has half a mind to throw him, and while I really shouldn't care after how my father has cared for me over the years, he's still my dad. "Hey! Dean, whoever you are, put him down! I don't know what the hell is going on here but if you can't discuss this like a grown man, you need to leave." I'm standing on my toes, yelling in Dean's face, trying to get in between them from the side. Dean stops and his shiny blue eyes are sending warmth directly into mine while he puts my dad back on his feet. If I didn't know better I'd say he was ready to cry, while seemingly standing up for me.

"Okay little one, sorry you had to see that. Go grab your things so we can go. Pack light."

"What? Where do you think I'm going?"

"You're coming with me, of course. We have to get your training started, you've missed so much time already, and you must be prepared to fill the role you were born for."

I look at my dad incredulously, he can't possibly be allowing this to happen. He just looks back at me with sad eyes, the same ones he's always had, and shrugs his small shoulders. "You need to go with Dean. He's right, I've been irresponsible all these years, keeping you from your people. He'll be better for you than I've ever been anyway." He gives me a small smile and I stare at him, not believing what's happening around me right now. He's really letting me go, sending me off with a stranger. A pang of betrayal strikes my chest like a bolt of lightning and I completely lose my breath. I realize I don't have an option.

"Come on little one, I'll help you pack a bag." Dean takes my hand and electricity shoots through my hand and up my arm like he shocked me. If that affected him too, he doesn't show it. I have to follow, rubbing the sore spot over my heart, trying to be numb to all of this. Dean walks me up the stairs and his hand gets tighter on mine the further we walk through the house. "This is where you live? How could your father not allow you to live like the royalty you are?" He's shaking his head and all I can think is, Royalty? Why would Dean ever think I'm royalty? Just look at me, I'm plain, pale, skinny, I've never been worth anyone's time.

He finds my school backpack and dumps the few things inside out on the bed. He puts the necessary things back inside, my phone charger, piercing cleanser, a few pads, and turns towards the closet. I don't have very many clothes, and I know he definitely notices that when he shakes his head with dismay. He throws some jeans and a couple of t-shirts in the bag before turning to grab a pajama set from the drawers. I rush to grab his arm before he opens my drawer of panties. He smirks at me and rolls his eyes, but backs away nonetheless. I grab a few pairs and rush to stuff them in the backpack.

He nods and zips it up, tossing it over his shoulder, and takes my hand again. We start back down the stairs and my dad is at the bottom, waiting. "I'm sorry I couldn't be a better parent to you. After I lost your mother, it just broke my heart, I haven't been the same since." I notice tears in his eyes but all he feels is relief, I know for a fact since his emotions affect me as well. "I know Dean will be better to you than I ever have been. I wish the best for you and I know you'll do great." He pulls me into a hug and I just stand there, I refuse to embrace him.

Dean never once let my hand go, he gives me a gentle squeeze as if telling me it's time to go. I pull away from my dad and follow Dean out to the bike. He turns me so he can put the backpack on my shoulders and then pulls a small helmet out of the compartment on the side. It feels weird on my head, bulky and tight, and scratchy on my chin when he buckles it there. He climbs on, starts the bike, and steadies it. After he folds back the kickstand, he motions to tell me it's my turn. I grip his shoulder and feel that electricity again. I try to ignore it while I throw my leg over to the other side. I'm not normally glad to be so tall but this is one of those few times where it comes in handy. Dean puts his own helmet on and pulls my hands around his stomach to hold on. I see my dad standing on the porch as we start to pull away, his hand raised in a goodbye wave and even though I don't motion back, I know this is the last time I'll ever see my father.

I'm riding on the road, gripping Dean's jacket like my life depends on it, because it does, and a sudden feeling of freedom hits me. I have no idea where I'm going, what I'll be doing, or why I'm doing this, but I do know from Dean's reactions to my old life that he's going to take care of me. Relief floods my system and tears prick my eyes. For once in my life, I let them fall, happy to be free of the past, happy to leave behind all the pain and sorrow, and happy to start fresh. And even though I'm terrified of this motorcycle, of Dean, of all these changes, I let go of Dean's jacket and send my arms out wide. I love the feeling of the wind blowing my unwashed hair off my back, the feeling of the air free on my hands and arms and face. All of a sudden, I'm laughing through my tears and let out a yell building in my chest "Wooooo!" And then Dean's own call follows mine. I don't know why, but now we're randomly laughing together, riding a motorcycle out of town, and I couldn't be bothered by anything in this moment.

Dean pulls off the road after a few hours, it's starting to get dark, and I really need to pee. He pulls into a small motel off the highway. I have no idea what town we're in right now, but oddly enough, that doesn't bother me. I start to walk towards the office with him, but he tells me to wait there by the bike. I start to ask, but then remember, I'm only 17. They'll want an ID to see I'm of age before staying in a hotel with someone other than my parent. How old is Dean? What are you even doing Gwen? You have no idea how old this man is, who he is, just that your dad handed you over to him. I push all negative thoughts out of my head as Dean comes back towards me, keycard in hand.

"Got a room, princess." He waggles his eyebrows and has a smirk on his mouth, but when he sees my expression, he quickly adds, "Two beds, of course. I was only joking."