South Deering

Chapter 8

On the ride over to Jeannie’s house, I was a big bundle of nerves, my hands were shaking, and my heart felt way out of whack. I kept telling myself, “It’s only a movie,” what could go wrong? Just go with the flow, and it’ll be over in a couple of hours.

What do I say when I see her?

Do I put my arm around her in the theater

Should I try and kiss her?

Why, I thought, was I asking myself all this s**t? Hadn’t I been a fill-in before with Augie and Mike?

Not to worry, I told myself, one date and she’ll be gone.

I parked at the curb and was about to get out when I noticed Larry, Jeannie, and Molly come out the front door. When they got to the sidewalk, Larry walked up to my car, leaned in, and said, “Let"s go in my car.” He had that sneaky smile, and I went along with it.

Putting my sunglasses on, I climbed out, locked the door, and was about to step up to the curb. Instead, I stopped and looked at where Molly and Jeannie were standing.

Jeannie said, “Hi,” but I don’t even think I heard her; all sound and motion seemed to stop. Molly was more beautiful than I remembered, just standing there looking at me with that beautiful smile. All I could think of was, “Why me?”

Finally, Molly walked up to me with a slight frown and asked, “Are you all right?”

“You are beautiful,” was all I managed to say.

“Don’t say that, please,” Molly answered, looking down at her feet.

“Why not?

“Because you don’t know me that well.”

“I don’t have to know someone to know they are beautiful.”

When Molly finally looked up at me, there was this wondrous and almost magical expression. I felt frozen to the spot. My arms and legs were not responding to my commands.

Molly reached up and, taking my sunglasses off, said rather shyly, “I’ve seen bruises before. It’s not that bad,” looking at my split lip, “I’ll have to be careful with that.”

“Are you guys coming or not?” Jeannie yelled, standing next to Larry’s car.

“Come on,” Molly said, taking hold of my hand.

We were sitting in the back seat no sooner than Molly laid her head on my shoulder, whispering, “Why did you hit Tommy? Was it because of—?”

“We’ll talk about it later, okay?”

“Okay,” was all she said.

Walking out of the Avalon Theater after three hours of “South Pacific” was a welcome relief. We were standing by the curb, waiting for Larry and Jeannie, when Molly asked, “Would you mind if we walked back? It’s such a beautiful night, and we’ve been sitting for the past three hours.”

Larry and Jeannie were on their way to the parking lot. “Hey, Lar,” I said. “We’re gonna walk back.”

“Okay,” he said, “I’ll see you at the house.”

Molly and I turned and began walking west on 79th Street. “You don’t talk much, do you?”

“Look, Molly, what happened between Tommy and me had nothing to do with you.”

“I know,” she said. “But I was the one who called you Flacco.”

“Yeah,” I said, “but he gave you the name, right?”

Soon we were standing at the intersection where 79th Street, South Chicago Avenue, and Stoney Island Avenue meet at different angles. When the light turned green, and we stepped off the curb, Molly reached over and took hold of my hand, crossing the street. My whole arm was shaking, and I couldn’t wait to get on the sidewalk.

Letting go of my hand, Molly walked a few steps ahead, turned, and said, “I can go back by myself now.”

“What’s that mean?”

“That means,” she said, “I don’t think you really want to be here.”

“Why do you say that?” I said, astonished.

“Why?” she inquired, sounding a bit angry. “You act like you don’t want to get close to me. We just sat for three hours and could have sat in different rows. What are you afraid of?”

We had passed under the Railroad Viaduct and were standing beneath the Skyway Overpass.

“You don’t like me very much, do you?” Molly inquired.

“I think it’s the opposite,” I responded, taking hold of her hands.

“You have a funny way of showing it,” she said, looking directly into my eyes.

“Can I tell you something without you laughing at me?”

“Okay,” she said, interlacing our fingers.

“I want you to know this is my first real date. I don’t know how to act or what to do. I wanted to put my arm around you in the show, but I didn’t know how to do it. Even now, crossing the street, just holding hands, I got the shakes.”

“You mean that?” Molly asked, now with that radiant smile. “You really get the shakes?”

“Yeah,” I answered, looking down at my shoes. Looking up, I saw she was smiling.

I tried to match her smile but couldn’t, so I kissed her instead, pressing my mouth to hers too hard. I could feel her lips crush beneath mine. She cried in mild pain.

“What do you think now?” I asked.

Her hands were fingering her bruised lips. “You hurt me,” Molly accused.

“I’m sorry, Molly,” I pleaded. “That’s the first time I’ve ever kissed anyone before.”

“You know what,” she said, “I believe you.”

“I’ll never lie to you, Molly.”

“Promise?” she asked.

“I promise,” was my answer.

“Okay then,” she said. “Let’s try that again.”

She came into my arms again, and this time the kiss was tender but with meaning. I don’t know how long we stood there, holding on to that kiss, but after some car horns and a few ‘get a room’ comments, we finally pulled apart, but not before Molly ran her tongue across my split lip. “That didn’t hurt, did it?” she asked with a smile.

“Molly, I—”

“Don’t say anything,” she whispered. “Just hold me a little while.”

So there we stood in the shadow of the Skyway on a beautiful night in May. I felt as if time had stood still. I didn’t want to move, thinking I might break the spell. I could have stood there all night.

I was so busy inhaling her beautiful scent that I almost didn’t notice the little shiver. “Are you cold?” I asked, not wanting to let go. Molly pulled back a little, lifted her head, looked deep into my eyes, and, smiling, replied, “Not really. I’ve never had this feeling after kissing anyone before. I can’t explain it.”

Somehow we ended up in front of Jeannie’s house. I noticed that Larry’s car was nowhere in sight. I was about to suggest that we sit in my car when Molly said, smiling, “I noticed you"re still holding my hand.”

“I don’t want to take a chance that you’ll disappear.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” she replied, “and I just want to say I had a great time tonight.”

“So did I,” I said, taking hold of her other hand.

“Really.”

“Yeah, really.”

“I know,” she said, “you didn’t really like the movie.”

“I’m not big on musicals.”

“Neither am I,” Molly mused. “Jeannie wanted to see it.”

“I enjoyed just sitting next to you.”

“Well, maybe you can put your arm around me next time.”

“That sounds like a plan,” I said.

“When will the next time be?” she asked, squeezing both hands.

“How about I call you?”

“Okay,” she answered, looking past me to the street where Larry and Jeannie had just pulled up to the curb. I knew that look. I’d had it myself a few times. It’s when you know you’re being let down slowly so as not to hurt your feelings.

Slowly, Molly let go of my hands, waited until Larry and Jeannie finished their goodnight kiss, then walked to the curb. Jeannie exited the car and walked to where Molly was standing.

“Enjoy your walk?” she asked, looking directly at Molly.

“Yeah,” Molly replied. “It’s a beautiful night.”

“I’ll see you upstairs then,” Jeannie said on her way to the front door.

“I have to go in now,” Molly said, searching my face. “Will you call me?”

“Okay, I’ll call.”

“We can talk some more, okay?”

“Yeah,” I said, “we’ll talk.”

I stood as if rooted to the spot, watching Molly slip through the front door. Back in my car, I lit up a Salem.

Letting out a plume of smoke, I thought, “Man, I really f****d that up. I really hoped that it was the right thing to do.”