Between the Lies - 2
1048 Words
"Probably."
Neither of us moved.
"I can feel it, you know," he said. "Through the bond. What you're feeling."
My breath caught. "And what am I feeling?"
"Confused. Angry. Scared." He paused. "And something else. Something you don't want to name."
"You're imagining things."
"Am I?"
He spun me around. Slowly. Giving me every chance to pull away.
I didn't.
We stood there, inches apart. His hands on my waist. Mine somehow finding their way to his chest.
"Tell me to stop," he said.
"Stop," I whispered.
But I was leaning closer.
"That's not convincing."
"I know."
He kissed me.
Soft at first. Questioning. Giving me every opportunity to pull away, to end this before it started.
I kissed him back instead.
And the bond sang.
Not the insistent pull it had been. But something else. Something deeper. Like coming home after years away.
I broke the kiss. Stepped back.
"This is a mistake."
"Probably," he agreed.
But his eyes said he didn't care.
Neither did I.
We didn't talk about it.
But things changed anyway.
He started touching me more casual brushes, his hand at the small of my back, tucking my hair behind my ear. Small gestures that felt enormous.
I caught myself seeking him out. Looking for him in crowded rooms. Smiling at his terrible jokes.
Marcus noticed. Of course he did.
"You're playing with fire," he said one afternoon.
"I know."
"Do you? Because from where I'm standing, you're falling for him."
I said nothing.
Because he was right.
Somewhere between the training sessions and the quiet conversations and the way Kade looked at me like I was something precious, I'd stopped pretending.
The bond wasn't making me want him.
I just wanted him.
And that was so much worse.
It happened on a night when the moon was full.
Kade found me in the garden, unable to sleep. He didn't ask why. Just sat beside me on the stone bench.
"Tell me something true," he said after a long silence.
"What?"
"Something true. Something real. No walls, no defenses. Just... truth."
I should refuse. Should keep my secrets locked tight.
"I'm scared," I said instead.
"Of what?"
"This. You. How you make me feel."
He was quiet for a moment. Then: "How do I make you feel?"
"Like maybe I could stop running. Stop hiding. Like maybe I could just... be."
He turned to face me. "Would that be so terrible?"
"Yes," I whispered. "Because eventually you'll figure out who I really am. What I really want. And you'll hate me for it."
"Sera"
"Don't. Please. Just... don't."
He cupped my face in his hands. "I don't know your secrets. Don't know what you're hiding. But I know this: I'm falling for you. Not because of the bond. Despite it. Because you're strong and fierce and you don't take my s**t. Because you make me laugh. Because when you look at me, I feel like maybe I could be better than I am."
Tears burned behind my eyes. "You don't know what you're saying."
"Don't I?" He pressed his forehead to mine. "I've spent five years feeling guilty. Five years trying to make amends for something I can't change. And then you showed up, and for the first time in five years, I felt something other than regret."
"Kade"
"I'm not asking for forever. I'm not asking for promises. I'm just asking for now. For this. For whatever you can give me."
I kissed him.
Harder this time. Desperate. Trying to convey everything I couldn't say.
I'm falling for you too. I didn't mean to. I hate that I am. But I can't stop.
He kissed me back with equal desperation.
When we broke apart, we were both breathing hard.
"Come with me," he said.
I knew what he was asking.
Knew what it would mean.
Knew I should say no.
"Yes," I said anyway.
He led me to his room.
Neither of us spoke. Words felt too dangerous right now.
The door closed behind us with a soft click.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
I answered by pulling him down to me.
We came together like a storm. All heat and desperation and need that had been building for weeks.
His hands on my skin felt like fire. Like absolution. Like everything I'd been denying myself.
I traced the scars on his body stories written in old wounds. He traced mine. We learned each other in the darkness, speaking a language that had nothing to do with words.
The bond thrummed between us. But this wasn't about the bond.
This was us. Choosing this. Choosing each other.
At least for tonight.
When it was over, we lay tangled together, his heartbeat steady under my ear.
"Stay," he murmured. Half-asleep already. "Don't go."
I should leave. Should put distance between us before this got more complicated.
"Okay," I whispered instead.
I stayed.
And in the morning, I'd deal with what that meant.
I woke to soft light filtering through the windows and Kade propped on one elbow, watching me.
"That's creepy," I said.
He smiled. "You snore."
"I do not."
"Little bit."
I shoved at him playfully. He caught my hand. Brought it to his lips.
"Good morning," he said.
Something in his voice made my throat tight.
This wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to feel this. He wasn't supposed to look at me like that.
But here we were anyway.
"Good morning," I managed.
He kissed me. Slow and sweet and nothing like last night's desperation.
This was worse.
This felt like promises neither of us could keep.
When he pulled away, his expression had grown serious.
"I know you're keeping secrets," he said. "I know there are things you're not telling me. And that's okay. You'll tell me when you're ready."
Guilt twisted in my stomach.
"Kade"
"But I need you to know something." He held my gaze. "Whatever those secrets are, whatever you're hiding it doesn't change this. Doesn't change how I feel about you."
I wanted to tell him he was wrong. That when he found out the truth, it would change everything.
But I couldn't form the words.
So I kissed him instead.
And pretended, just for a little while longer, that this could last.
- Writer
