Madness

False Enthusiasm

(Sugars P.O.V.)

My body rocked with Sickos as the train conductor pumped the dreaded breaks. All about the cart everyone falling, stumbling around like drunken rag dolls. One would think they learn by now to remain low until the odd conductor made up his bloody mind on a complete stop. Each time though, by what I've seen through-out my five years here is...they all always choose to stand, and stumble around in poorly executed attempts to collect what each of them would need for their acts and begin to put on the nessiary make-up to bring their own characters to light, for the show once again. It alluded me, what this constant need to rush was brought on by, until the day I met the ring master...Jared Barkley....

The trains brakes hiss, causing Sicko to tighten his already overwhelming oxen grasp on me. I glance my curious eyes up to his prominent features. I could see the soft pink hue returning to his already sun kissed cheeks. He must feel my gaze...but why does he react so?

I could feel my own cheeks begin to warm, until the train comes to a full and final stop, causing every body surrounding us in the cart to topple over like dominos. I grit my teeth with a groan as I dart my eyes around every single face of my fellow carnies.

I shift slowly, Sicko reluctantly loosens his grip and allows me to get to my feet. I could feel the intensity of his gaze upon me as I make my way forward.

" Is everybody alright?"

I ask, sincere worry in my tone, for these people where my family.

Five years around them, getting to know them all as individuals, they where truly lovely people, kind, soft spoken, loyal, and devoted. Highly committed to their craft, despite Jareds harsh nature...

" What's it to ya toots!"

...most of them anyway...

" Not today Jasper, we all deal with enough each day without you piling on..."

I clap my hands together, forcing a smile to show brightly through gritted teeth.

" So come on, let's do what we do best, and make our audience scream with fear! "

I thrust my fist in the air, they follow suit seeming to be capvated by my enthusiasm as their frowns turn up into eager smiles the dimness in there eyes fading, being replaced by that show time twinkle.

" Come on guys, maybe someone will wretch again!"

Dominick chuckled out...

" That was great! "

Dominick was a tall lanky man, with a rubbery like flesh, he could bend and stretch his thin limbs and skin in a most unholy of manors. He was a big hit with all the audiences we've had. One of the most favored. He was a kind soul, always looking on the brighter side of things from what I've seen, but Dominick also had a cheeky streak. He loved to make people feel weak in the knees, nauseated, or even vomit. Bless him though, bless them all. Deep down I hoped that one day we all could escape this dreadful life. To gain bigger and better things... I wished the best for every one of them.

I was elated to cheer everyone up each day... glad to see them smiling, as they chatter in unison.

Jasper runs a black nail polished hand through his greasy jet black hair with a scoff. He sulks over...digging his finger tips into the heavy steel plated door heaving with a deep huff. The door bellows as it falls open. Sunlight pours in light a yellow water fall, blinding all us darkness ridden dwellers. The last two days all of us been cased in the cart like pigs to slaughter. It was hot, cramped and trying, at times we got under each other's skin, but at the end of the day...we had each other's backs, most did anyway. Groans and moans erupted in the cart as we drown in fresh morning light. Everyone murmurs and makes there way around Jasper hopping down onto the grass, ready to set up the big top.

Jasper shoots his emerald green eyes in my direction, as the last of the family leave the cart. His body unmoving, eyes drifting along the length of my body, as if he was sizing me up.

" You won't always be the one to win over the crowd...."

He heaved, in his grainy, nasaly voice with a sharp hiss. The deep wretch of hate that burned brightly in his eyes.There was no hiding that. Perhaps, he didn't want to. Jasper was a wounded man. A man beyond the want for help. He lerches forward, leaping off into the grass with the others. I couldn't help the tinge of ache that lingered in my heart. Maybe I was too soft. Jasper always hated me, so what was the point in trying to change a stubborn mind.

I sigh silently to myself, then suddenly...I feel a wave of heat behind me. My eyes widen as I realize Sicko never got off the train with the others.

" You may not always be able to win over every crowd, or every person in the crowd, but you'll win over the ones who truly see your worth. "

His rough voice like a melody. The heat of his breath causes my lips to tremble as it caresses my ear lobe...what was happening to me?

I felt my heart drum desperately against my ribcage. My ear drum begging to hear the sweet sounds of his voice again.

" By the way..."

He chimes.

" I love your brand of false enthusiasm, you must teach your ways to me somtime."

My mouth falls agape, as he walks past, giving me a playful wink. He hops off the train with a grunt, landing heavily on his feet in the dew covered grass.

" Also..."

Sicko, sighs out, his body seems to stiffen, his knuckles turning white, through tightly balled fists.

" Jared better let you perform this time

...I'd love to see you live again...it's been weeks niw...."

I draw in a heavy breath...silently hoping that I will be able to. Jared been keeping me on the side lines, despite the audiences beckoning pleas and chants.

I suppose I'll see soon enough. I step forward to the edge of the cart, hearing the last huffing sighs of the engine choking out its last heaving spurts of life.

" Well New York...here we are."