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I am crying so hard I can’t breathe. Daniel is bent over me, holding me, trying to find out if I’m all right. He thinks maybe I’m hurt. I am—I’m so hurt if I start screaming I know I’ll never stop.
It’s not Christine’s fault. I know it’s because Halli spoke. Christine lost her grip and she couldn’t hold on. And now she’s so upset she’s shaking, and Olga is trying to comfort her. I can’t say anything about what happened or I’m going to make it worse.
But to be ripped apart again, ripped out of my own body like that, sent shooting back across whatever great divide is between Halli and me—it was like having my skin torn off in one long strip, like having my hair pulled out from the roots, like having all my teeth broken to bits with a hammer. My body feels like it’s on fire. Every singl
