Fated From the Start

I Can't DO This

Harlow POV

I awoke suddenly, like I'd been having a bad dream. I looked around and had absolutely no idea where I was. The bedroom was extremely nice, but very masculine. Then the scent flooded my nose, warm earthy rain and fresh spices- everything smelled like Ashton. This must be his room. I'd never been to his house before, we always kept our dates out in public. How exactly had I ended up here this time?

Then everything came flooding back. Ash was a werewolf. Mother have mercy, werewolves were real and I'd been dating one for months. How were werewolves real? How was this my life? Wait, were the other guys werewolves too? I'm gonna faint again… 

No. Harlow. Get it together. You're in a freaking werewolf's house. We need to get out of here, wherever the hell here is. 

From the minimal light coming through the window I could tell I'd been out for awhile and it was late evening now. I didn't know where Ash was, but he wasn't in the room with me. However, I could also tell from the window that we were pretty far up so I couldn't get out of the house without going through the house.

I quietly found my belongings and made my way to the door. I flung it open ready to make a break for it and ran straight into Ash's back. He'd apparently been leaning against the door waiting for me.

"OH f**k!" the words burst from my lips before I could stop them. I clamped a hand over my mouth a second too late. 

Ash was instantly on his feet and taking me into his arms. "Please don't." I said pushing him back. 

"Harlow, please." He pleaded, so much fear and sorrow swimming in his eyes it looked like he might cry. "I know it's a lot to take in, but I'm still the same person you've known for months. Nothings changed."

"Nothings changed?" I practically screamed. "You're a freaking werewolf! You're a monster!"

He looked as if I'd smacked him across the face and his gaze fell defeated. My outburst apparently was heard through the house because suddenly Brice, Callan, and Cedar were standing behind Ash with eager looks on their faces.

"He finally told you! I'm so excited," Callan exclaimed, failing to read the room. 

"All of you?" I asked vaguely. Words seemingly hard to summon with everything that was swimming in my brain. 

They nodded sheepishly, gathering what I was asking. My world was getting fuzzy around the edges again. Every single one of these men I'd let become like family was secretly a monster. What was life… 

Noticing my wobbly state both Ash and Cedar reached to catch me. "Don't." I stated firmly. "I can't do this. I want to go home." My voice was feeble and fading. I felt like my world was crashing in. 

"I can take you home." Ash replied weakly. He looked like his heart was breaking into a million pieces and I couldn't wrap my head around whether to be terrified of him because he was a monster or be sad because he was the man I loved.

He turned and led me to the end of the hall to an elevator, the house had an elevator. 

"Totty, please." Cedar was following behind us pleading. "Just hear us out, we're not monsters, I promise." I didn't respond, I didn't have the words or even the coherent thoughts.

Cedar followed us all the way down to the garage, looking like a puppy that had been smacked with a rolled up newspaper. Ash opened my car door for me like it was any other day, but he didn't make eye contact and he looked as if someone had stomped the air out of his chest. In his crumpled, distraught state it really was hard to believe he could shape shift into a deadly beast at the drop of a pin. Seriously, how were werewolves a real thing. 

He climbed into the seat next to me with a sigh, the bubbling tears finally spilling over the edge. He pulled out of the garage with the tears silently streaming down his face. "I love you, Harlow. I need you to know that." He finally breathed out. Again, I didn't respond, but this time the tears fell from my eyes. 

As we pulled up in front of my apartment I tried to find the words to say, but I still came up empty handed. 

"I know what you've learned today is a lot to process, please take as long as you need to do so. If you want to talk about it I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you, Harlow. I truly hope someday you can accept this side of me, because I don't think I can do life without you. You're my one Harlow, it's always been you and it will always be you. I was meant to be infinitely by your side. While you're processing this please don't forget the real me and all the things we did together. I truly love you, Harlow." There was so much pleading and longing in his voice. I honestly wanted to curl up in his lap and let him comfort me, but half my brain was screaming at me that he was a monster and to get as far from him as I could. 

"I'm sorry." It was the only words I could muster. I knew I was breaking his heart and I was truly sorry for that, but how could I just overlook the fact that not only were monsters real, but he was one.

I climbed out of the car, Ash not opening my door for me for the first time ever because he was too busy staring blankly out the windshield. I stumbled up to my apartment and fell into my bed, sobbing myself to sleep.