The True Luna's Kiss

Chapter 20

"So you're actually saying nothing happened?" Alice exclaimed.

It was the next morning and Sirona and Alice were walking through the gardens around the pack house. The sun was dipping in and out of clouds, and a soft mountain breeze was dancing around them. Sirona was enjoying to being outside, but it was definitely taking some getting used to. She often had the feeling that she was in a dream, and would wake up in that cell. Even asleep in her luscious bed, nightmares had taken hold of her and lurched her awake, panting and gasping. If she could make a sound, she knew she would have been screaming. When she awoke this morning, she had no idea what to do, besides taking care of her needs. It was only when Alice had come in that Sirona had a purpose. She dressed, with help and went down for breakfast. Many pack members greeted them, but Gabriel was no where to be seen. So when Alice had suggested a walk outside, Sirona had nodded eagerly. It wasn't that she was desperate to be in the open air, she just didn't want to be alone.

And here she was. Outside! Walking around as if she belonged. With a friend.

Sirona didn't know if she could call Alice a friend. Not really. But she was definitely the closest thing she could call a friend. So a friend she was. They had chatted through breakfast, and then out into the grounds. Well, Alice had filled the silence enough for the both of them. Sirona had nodded, shook her head and tried to communicate as best she could at the questions Alice asked. To her credit, Alice tried to stick to yes or no questions, sparing Sirona the pain of trying to act her answers out. Somehow they had gotten on to the subject of Gabriel. And then onto the subject of what had happened - or more rather, what had not happened. Sirona had shrugged, unable to explain fully and glad that she was not being forced to share her shame. Her mate didn't want her.

"Now that isn't true!" Briar said, calmly for the fiftieth time today. "He clearly does want you. There is something else going on!"

Sirona didn't know what to think. Her mind kept flickering to Gabriel. Alpha Gabriel. Their new Alpha and her mate. Sirona could still not believe it whenever it came to mind. She knew she should have felt happy, contented. She was free and with the one fated to her. But instead all she felt was confusion and disappointment.

There was one positive about being here that Sirona had no doubts was good. She wasn't being given frequent doses of silver and wolfsbane.

So Briar was getting stronger...

"Are you gay?"

Gabriel growled softly at his Beta. Since heading to his office late last night and staying there, cooped up all through the day, Marco and Max had been teasing him. Shadow, on the other hand, was ignoring him, which in some ways was a blessing. He had a headache outside himself right now, he couldn't cope with one in his head as well.

"But seriously, that girl is stunning. Are you sure you're not really, really gay?" Marco said again. He was sitting on the windowsill behind Gabriel's desk. Like an annoying, chattering parrot that Gabriel wanted to launch out of the window. He just might do that, he thought. Sighing, Gabriel set down the reports he had been trying, and failing to read.

"Don't you think I know how beautiful she is?" Gabriel asked, his voice soft but not weak. "I can't focus knowing she is nearby, that she is here. I can barely contain myself around her."

"So why are you?" Max was sitting on the sofa - sprawled was a more fitting term. Covered in cookie crumbs, he was munching his way through a second packet, a plate of them balanced on his stomach.

Gabriel sighed again. He knew he would have to say the words out loud at some point. Say what was in his mind, describe the very reason thorns were choking his heart. He didn't want to think about the debt he had taken on, all those years ago. He was young, he made a mistake. At least now it felt like a mistake, back then it felt right. He was taking on the pain of so many, helping those who were weaker, frailer. It had been the right thing to do.

But now...

"She's a healer," Gabriel said quietly and slid the cuffs of his shirt up his wrist showing his hand. The smooth skin of his hand. No scars, no blemishes.

"s**t!" Marco gasped. Even his Beta had no jokes to make about this. He hopped down from the windowsill to take a closer look. Max had sat up on the sofa, the cookie plate and contents scattered across the floor.

"How many did you lose?" Max asked carefully. He knew this would be a sore subject.

"Twenty seven." Gabriel's voice was low and sorrowful. Max and Marco went pale.

"And that was just from touching her hand?" Marco pressed, gripping his Alpha's hand and turning it over and over. The skin was smoother than he had ever seen it, even the calluses and rough skin from fighting and training had gone.

Gabriel nodded and as Marco released his hand, he slammed it down onto the table in a fist. Max jumped at the sounds, cookie crumbs tumbling down onto the carpet. The silence in the room became thick, heavy. Moments passed like a frozen scene, no one spoke, no one moved. Marco and Max couldn't tear their eyes away from their Alpha. Gabriel's eyes were on his un-scarred hand.

"I can't touch my mate." Gabriel whispered. "I can't hold her, kiss her, claim her! Not without erasing years of work." Gabriel stood and walked to the window, staring out at the gardens. Two figures caught his eye, one blonde, one dark haired. His heart caught in his throat, his eyes following the graceful figure as she meandered around the grounds. Sunshine danced in her hair, making it look blue and violet in the shifting light. Shadow whined, the first noise he had made all day. Gabriel wanted her so badly, wanted to be near her. His canines elongated at the thought of sinking in to her creamy flesh. He shook his head and took a deep breath. He couldn't think like that. The deadline was close. He needed to be strong. He could do this.

"You should tell her," Marco said, pressing his hand on his Alpha's shoulder. "Explain."

"I can't," Gabriel replied, his voice cracking. "When she finds out, when she hears the reasons, she will leave. I can't.... I can't lose her."

"Lose who?" A silky voice echoed through the room. Max and Marco looked up and said a single word in unison.

"s**t!"