Chapter 14
1720 Words
I was happy to have Jo back home. Yet at the same time I was not very happy to have Jo home. Because it put a strain on my courtship.
Jo was getting along with Laurie the past few days. I was grateful. It humbled my heart to see two good friends working things out together.
But my heart was till in shambles. And it was never going to recover again. I had come up with a plan. I needed to talk things over with Marmee and Meg about it before I went about doing it.
I find Marmee in the kitchen hunched over some dessert she was baking for our dinner tonight. She looked very happy. I knew she was excited about becoming a grandmother soon.
I knew Meg had to be nervous could be. I hoped one day I would become a mother myself. Laurie's kids would be adorable with his handsome smile. And kind eyes. Whoever had a child with him would be deeply blessed.
•✿︎︎•
"Marmee we need to talk" I softly speak up.
"Fiona dear come help me finish these apple pies. They are going to be wonderful" she tells me. "go on tell me what troubles you?" she asks me.
"Well, the baby is going to be here any time now. And Meg and John only have one another. A new baby can be stressful as can be. I was thinking of offering myself as a nurse or live in help to them. And work there. I love it here do not get me wrong. I am so thankful you took me in. But I would love to ask Meg and I wanted to ask you first if that would be alright by you?" I ramble out a long-winded question.
Marmee looked baffled by my announcement.
"It is better than my first plan to go back home" I tease.
"Are you that unhappy here child?" she worries.
"No, it is not you. It is hard to live beside Laurie. And Jo. I need a break" I answer her softly so no one over hears me.
"Oh, that is why. I get it now" sighs Marmee. "I would say go for it! Meg could use the help and I agree it is much better than you returning home. This is your home now child" she reminds me with a hug.
"What is going on?" wonders Jo as she comes entering the room.
•✿︎︎•
She had fresh ink stains on her hands. She had to have been writing up in the attic.
"Fiona wants to go stay over at Meg's home. And help with the new baby. And I think that is such a wonderful selfless act don't you Jo?" wonder Marmee.
"Wonderful" says Jo though she eyes me suspiciously.
Once Marmee left the kitchen Jo corners me.
"Why are you really moving?" wonders Jo. "is it me? And I making you upset?" she wants to know. "I can change"
"No Jo it is not you" I softly say with a smile. I hated to lie to her.
"I know you are lying to my face Fiona March! I can always tell when you lie! Your right eye twitches" she retorts. "You are wanting to leave because of Laurie isn't that right?" she challenges me.
We have a stare down in the kitchen.
"Yes" I shamefully admit. "It is hard being here near him. At Meg's I would be away" I tell her. "I am sorry, but it still hurts me"
"But if you only knew what he said to me the other day" she begins.
"I really do not want to hear anything of what you two talk about" I grumble.
"Even if it was about you?" she asks me.
"Even if it was about me" I tell her.
"What is going on? Can you use help before dinner?" Meg says as she comes in.
"Meg! Just the person I wanted to see! I needed to ask you something" I tell her happily.
"Do not listen to her" grumbles Jo.
Meg looks confused as she is stuck in the middle of us.
•✿︎︎•
"The baby is going to be a lot of work. And you will need extra hands. Can I? May I be of service to you and John? I can move in. And help everyday" I offer to her.
"You have never babysat. A child will keep you up all night" she worries. "It is a very kind offer" she tells me.
I take her aside away from Jo's listing ears.
"I need to get out of here. Or I might end up going back home. And I do not wish to do that to my family. But it hurts deeply inside being near Laurie daily" I tell her softly. "I am sure you can understand. I would be of great help and the baby would not bother me the slightest" I promised her.
She smiles at me. "I know you are taking this break up so hard." she sighs. "Alright you can move in. Let me talk to John first. I am sure he will be on board with the idea" says Meg.
I hug her. "Oh, thank you thank you Meg!"
"Have you talked to Laurie since Jo came home?" wonders Meg curiously.
I shake my head. "No"
"I think you should before you take off on him" Meg tells me.
"He will not miss me at all with Jo back" I scoff.
"I am not so sure about that" Meg says with a smile.
"Fiona the pies need to cool off can you set them on the window sill in the back?" Marmee asks me.
"Of course I can Marmee" I answer her.
I go get one pie then the next setting it out to cool. They sure smelled so good. My tummy growls at me with hunger.
It was close to dinner time here.
•✿︎︎•
"Fiona?"
"Laurie?"
"Hello" he answers looking shy almost. He smiles.
"How have you been doing?" I question as my heart leaps in my throat.
It hurt to look at him.
He was so handsome.
"I am doing well thank you. And you?" he wonders.
"I am doing well also" I answer.
"Marmee's pies smell wonderful. They are a delight" he makes small talk.
"Yes, they are" I agree.
"Fiona! John is here. And I talked things over! You may move in with us! Oh, Fiona this is a great idea!" Meg tells me then she spots that I am not alone. Laurie's face falls. He looked a little angered.
And hurt.
"Move? Where?" he softly asks Meg.
"Fiona offered her services at my home. To help me with the baby" Meg brags on me. "she is so selfless" Meg head back inside.
"You can't stand me that much that you have to move away from here?" Laurie snaps suddenly.
"It is not like that. Meg needed me" I remind him.
"It does not matter who else needs you around here does it?" he remarks with anger in his voice.
"I wanted to talk about the courtship and where I stand but I get where I stand now. I see things crystal clear" he tells me.
"Laurie...." I sigh.
What a mess....
But he would see this was for the best.
He glares with anger at me then runs back home. Tears come to me. This was not easy for me either. I did not want to move away from him.
I wanted to run to him. But my heart would not allow it. I knew deep down he was not mean to be with me. He was meant for Jo. Tears fall. I headed upstairs to be alone for a bit before dinner.
I dry my eyes after having a good cry. I noticed Jo was writing a story there. I picked it up. It was called "My Beth" Jo was writing about her family. I wondered what about.
I was curious so I began to read it. It was so good I could not put it down. I could tell Jo really put her heart into the story. Jo missed her beloved Beth so dearly.
•✿︎︎•
"What are you doing?" laughs Jo as she comes in.
"Sorry, I could not put it down. Jo really this is wonderful" I tell her.
I set her story back down.
"I keep thinking about all my time with Beth. I miss her so deeply. I love having you here. It helps to. It helps all of us. But writing this it is like keeping Beth alive" she sighs as she sits on the couch there in the room.
"I get that. I loved getting to know Beth even more" I say.
"Do you really have to go?" Jo asks me. "I need you to"
"I need you as well. But I have to for now. To help Meg. And I will be back" I promise her. "Then who knows you are Laurie will be working it all out and I will be fine"
"I do not think Laurie will ever be over you" mentions Jo.
That remark surprised me.
"He never was into me" I tell her. "I was only a replacement for you"
"I do not think he sees things that way. I never saw him like this. And I know Teddy better than he knows himself" Jo points out.
"I do not wish to talk about Teddy....I mean Laurie" I sigh. "sorry"
"I am sorry" she says she hugs me. I hug her.
"Jo, I am glad you are home" I promise her.
"For a moment I was worried you did not think so" laughs Jo.
"I am truly. You are like a sister I never had" I giggle.
"I am your sister. Forever" she vows as we hug again.
I felt a little better talking to Jo. But I knew she was wrong about Laurie. It was her he was not over not me.
She would soon come to see that.
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- Writer
