The taste of forbidden

8. Closeness. [Part 2]

"Damn it." Invaded by a past I can’t change anymore, I mutter under my breath, which makes one of the horses neigh loudly. Immediately, two others respond, starting to get nervous. I try to calm them down, but just then I hear a high-pitched scream, too sharp and feminine to belong to a horse.

I move through the stables until I find her.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Lia is huddled in a corner, sitting on hay with her laptop on her lap. The horse she's keeping company seems restless, which probably caused her to scream.

"Get out of there!" I yell at her.

"Don't yell at me," she says in a hurt voice, holding her forehead with one hand.

"Come on, give me your hand." I reach out to her, but being the stubborn woman she is, she doesn’t accept my help. Seeing her about to kiss the floor, I grab her arm while she clumsily clings to her laptop.

"f*****g hell, let me see."

"I'm fine," she mumbles, trying to wriggle out of my grip. But I tangle my fingers in a section of her hair and gently tilt her head back.

I can see my touch surprises her, but she doesn’t pull away.

"Did the horse kick you?" I narrow my eyes, inspecting her forehead.

"I said I'm fine."

"You're already getting a bump." I tilt her head further back, which makes her scowl at me. "Honestly, I'm surprised. With how hard-headed you are, I never thought anything could damage that skull of yours."

"Go fu— ouch!" she groans when I prod the bump with my thumb.

She grabs my wrist with one hand, trying to make me stop, but I hold her more firmly. My palm and thumb brush her cheek, while the rest of my fingers sink into her hair, touching her scalp.

"I'm just checking if it's serious. Stay still."

"I don't trust you."

I stay silent, continuing the inspection more carefully this time. There's no blood, and it looks like a superficial wound, just some swelling from the impact.

"You’ll live," I let her go, shaking my fingers to rid myself of the feeling of her soft hair against my skin.

Lia touches the bump again, looking at me with one eye squinting and the other open.

"Don't be dramatic." I pick up some hay and start stacking it in the stall where we keep it. "By the way, can I know what the hell you were doing hiding over there?"

"None of your business."

I stop what I’m doing and stare at her.

"It is my business when you’re disturbing my horses."

"You were the one who disturbed them with that curse you blurted out."

"I didn’t..." I sigh, because the truth is, I have no desire to fight with her right now. I suspect she heard my conversation with Hank, which makes me uncomfortable and a little angry. Plus, the parallel between her bump and my memory of Lucas is too much to handle right now.

I keep organizing the hay Hank brought, focusing on the hard work to avoid intrusive thoughts.

I’m aware she hasn’t left. I know because her scent is still strong in the air. I don’t know how I didn’t notice it before... that lavender smell, so natural, lingering behind wherever she goes. The horses don’t seem to mind; her fragrance is too subtle and soft to bother my animals.

A small laugh makes me glance her way, and I suppress a smile when I see a horse poking its muzzle through to tangle itself in her blonde strands.

Clearly, the horses like her scent.

Perfume is a strict issue among us and the workers; even Cass knows that. Horses have an incredibly developed sense of smell, so to avoid issues, strong scents are banned around them.

And there’s Lia, breaking the rules. And even though her scent isn’t strong, just soft and delicate, it’s still strange for me to see that the horses like it.

Another laugh slips from her mouth, making her look younger than she is, and her smile lights up her face like the Fourth of July.

She almost seems like a completely different woman than the one I’m used to dealing with.

"It’s your scent," I explain, stepping closer to untangle her blonde strands from the horse.

"What about my scent?"

"They like it."

She laughs again and I lower my gaze to her glowing expression, my fingers pausing in her hair.

She is truly beautiful.

I look away the moment her eyes meet mine and focus on freeing her hair, caught on a splinter in the wood. I’m guessing that’s the horse’s doing.

"There you go," I whisper, releasing the last strand.

I step away and go back to the hay. I can feel her gaze fixed on me.

It’s obvious she doesn’t trust me, that she doesn’t even think well of me. And I can’t stop wondering what things would’ve been like between us under different circumstances, if I had met her properly, when my brother was still alive. Maybe our animosity would be the same, since our dislike seems to be in our blood. Or maybe not… maybe in another world, another reality, she and I could’ve gotten along, and I would’ve learned to care for her as she is: Lucas’s wife, my family.

Now, with nothing but her distrust, I have no choice but to sneak into her cabin to make the repairs it needs, because I doubt she’ll let me in to do it otherwise.

Which leads me to ask…

"Where do you go every morning?"

"What?"

"In the mornings," I say, "where do you go?"

"Why do you care?"

"Will you ever answer me in a way that’s not that?"

She goes quiet and looks away, lips pursed in something that isn’t quite a pout, but not a scowl either.

"It’s hard for me to have a normal conversation with you after what we talked about in your office, Becket. Or have you forgotten?"

No, I haven’t forgotten, and although part of me wanted to apologize the very second it happened, I can’t. I can’t back down—not when it comes to something as important as this land.

But I don’t want to argue, so I just sigh and keep working.

I know there’s something she wants to tell me—that’s why she hasn’t left yet—so I’m not surprised when she asks, "What’s the deal between Cass, Hank, and you?"

Following her example, I say, "Why do you care?"

That shuts her up, and surprisingly, a silence settles that, while tense, isn’t exactly uncomfortable. Not completely. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her set the laptop aside and lean her arms on one of the rails, staring out at the dark landscape.

Honestly, I’m surprised she stays, but I understand it too. Despite all the bad blood between us, I’m the only thing keeping her connected to Lucas. Just like she is the same for me.

I keep working in silence, the only sound around us being the crickets. It’s hot as hell, but taking off my shirt might make her uncomfortable, so I leave it on.

Once I’m done, I test my luck and step closer to her.

[2/3]