Chapter 32
1544 Words
Amber's POV
The week after my talk with Timothy felt longer than the entire semester combined.
Every time my phone buzzed, a small part of me hoped it was him, and every time it actually was, I didn’t reply right away. Sometimes not at all.
It wasn’t that I was angry.
I was scared.
Because every conversation we had, every soft smile or lingering glance, chipped away at the fragile distance I was trying so hard to keep.
And if I didn’t pull back now, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to.
So I started avoiding him.
Not in an obvious way, no dramatic dodging in the halls or fake excuses, just enough that he’d notice the absence but not the reason.
If he texted, I replied hours later.
If I saw him coming down the hall, I ducked into another classroom.
And when he showed up at the library one afternoon, all easy grin and warmth, I pretended I had a group study session and slipped out before he could sit beside me.
Juliet noticed, of course.
She always did.
“You and Timothy okay?” she asked one evening, leaning against her bunk as I was currently working on a project.
“Hm. Yeah,” I lied too quickly.
She tilted her head. “You’ve been acting weird. You usually light up when he texts you.”
“I’m just busy,” I muttered.
Her eyes narrowed a little. “Busy avoiding him?”
I looked up sharply. “What makes you say that?”
Juliet shrugged. “You forget I see things. You two were fine last week, then suddenly you’re ghosting him.”
She hesitated, then added carefully, “Is this about Lydia?”
Of course it was, partly.
But it was also about the way my stomach flipped every time Timothy smiled, the way his voice softened when he said my name, and how dangerous that was becoming.
I sighed. “I just… need some space, Jules. Things got messy. I don’t want to make it worse.”
Juliet nodded slowly, biting her lip. “That’s fair. But, um… if you’re thinking of staying out of the drama, you might want to keep an eye out.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
She hesitated before saying, “Lydia’s been talking. She’s not over what happened at the park.”
My chest tightened. “Talking how?”
Juliet sighed. “Mostly complaining and lamenting about how Timothy has changed because of you.”
She looked at me carefully. “I don’t agree with her, but you know how she is when she feels cornered.”
“Great,” I muttered, pressing a hand to my temple. “Just what I needed.”
Juliet chuckled softly but didn’t push it. I could tell she was stuck between the two of us, Lydia’s friendship and whatever this weird, new understanding between us had become. And honestly, I couldn’t blame her.
If I were her, I wouldn’t know what side to pick either.
---
The next few days, I poured all my energy into not thinking about Timothy.
It was exhausting.
Then, as if the universe was rewarding me for trying, Ben appeared. It's been awhile I've seen him ever since our little hangout. Oh right and there was this day he was looking for a building and I showed him, he was in a hurry so we couldn't really talk much.
He spotted me outside the law building, balancing a tray of coffee cups in one hand and his laptop bag in the other. “Amber! Just the person I wanted to see.”
I blinked in surprise. “Really?”
“Yeah,” he said, grinning. “I owe you coffee. Remember that day you helped me find the economics building?”
I laughed softly. “That was like a few days ago.”
“Hey, debts don’t expire that fast.” He held out a cup. “Caramel macchiato, right?”
I raised a brow. “Lucky guess.”
He winked. “Good memory.”
Something about him, the easy charm, the lack of complication, felt like exactly what I needed.
So I stayed. We sat on the campus steps, talking about everything and nothing. He told me about his failed attempt to cook ramen with milk, and I nearly choked on my drink laughing.
It was simple. Light. The opposite of what everything with Timothy had become.
We started hanging out more after that. Sometimes he’d walk me to class; other times, we’d grab lunch at the student café. He was easy to talk to, never pressing for details I didn’t want to share, never reading too deeply between lines.
For the first time in weeks, I could breathe.
---
One evening, I was sprawled on my bed, scrolling through photos Ben had sent me of his attempt at baking cookies, when Juliet piped up.
“You and Ben are getting close,” she said casually.
I shrugged, pretending to focus on my phone. “He’s nice.”
“Yeah,” Juliet said, stretching out on her bed. “He’s also cute. Which doesn’t hurt.”
I smiled, hiding my face behind my phone. “He’s just a friend.”
She gave a low hum that said she didn’t believe me. “Uh-huh”.
“He isssss” I said in a whining tone.
Juliet gave me a teasing look. “i believe youuu.”
I just smiled, shaking my head.
---
By the weekend, my plan to avoid Timothy seemed to be working.
That is, until fate decided to mess with me again.
It was Saturday afternoon, and Ben and I had just finished studying at the library. We were currently walking toward the courtyard.
“So,” he said, “I was thinking…movie night? There’s this outdoor screening by the fountain later.”
I smiled. “That sounds nice.”
We stopped near one of the benches, still laughing about something ridiculous he’d said, when I heard my name.
“Amber?”
I turned, and froze.
Timothy was standing a few feet away, holding a coffee cup, surprise flickering across his face before settling into something more guarded.
“Hey,” I said awkwardly.
“Hey,” he echoed, his gaze shifting briefly to Ben, then back to me. “Didn’t know you were around.”
“Yeah, just… hanging out.” I gestured vaguely.
Ben, ever the smooth one, extended a hand. “Timothy, right? I’ve heard about you.”
Timothy shook his hand, polite but stiff. “Yeah. Ben.”
The silence that followed was so thick I could almost taste it. I hated how aware I was of every shift in Timothy’s expression, the small tightening of his jaw, the flicker in his eyes when he looked at me.
“Well,” Ben said cheerfully, oblivious, “we were just about to grab something to eat. You want to join us?”
Before I could even respond, Timothy shook his head. “Nah, I’ve got somewhere to be.”
“Okay,” Ben said, shrugging easily. “Catch you around then.”
Timothy nodded once, his eyes meeting mine briefly before he turned and walked away.
I didn’t breathe until he was out of sight.
Ben glanced at me, eyebrows raised. “That was awkward.”
I laughed weakly. “You think?”
“you guys aren't talking anymore?”
I shook my head. “its… complicated.”
He didn’t push further. “Well, complicated can wait. You still up for that movie?”
I smiled. “Yeah. Definitely.”
But even as we walked away, my chest felt tight.
Because the entire time, all I could think about was the look on Timothy’s face, like he was trying not to care and failing.
---
Later that night, after the movie, Ben walked me back to the dorms. The campus was quiet, the air cool against my skin.
“I had fun,” he said, his voice low.
“Me too,” I admitted.
He smiled, that easy, untroubled smile that never asked for more than I could give. “Goodnight, Amber.”
“Goodnight, Ben.”
As he walked away, I found myself standing there longer than I should’ve, watching his silhouette fade into the shadows.
It should’ve been simple, liking someone kind, someone uncomplicated. But deep down, I knew the truth:
My heart wasn’t simple. And it definitely wasn’t done with Timothy.
---
The next morning, I found a message waiting on my phone.
Timothy: Can we talk?
I stared at it for a full minute, fingers hovering over the screen. Then, with a deep breath, I locked my phone and tossed it face-down on the desk.
Not today.
Maybe not ever.
Because every time I tried to move closer to him, it hurt.
And every time I tried to move away, it hurt even more.
So I decided to stay somewhere in between, not quite close, not completely gone.
Somewhere safe.
Somewhere temporary.
But even as I told myself that, a quiet voice in the back of my mind whispered the truth I didn’t want to face:
You can’t hide from something that lives inside you.
- Writer
