When Everything Changes

Six: "It's Just Your Imagination"

I think a lot about the days before the changes were put in place. Before I ever saw that man go up onto the mayor's stage at the spring festival in his crisp suit. The suit so stiff and clean it was as if it were looking down at me. Mocking me like I was nothing but the dust that was so carefully wiped off the shoulders. 

I think of my old friends, the ones who would take me on road trips or go to stores to shop for hours. I think of the days where I would sit in school watching the boy with shiny hair and bright eyes wishing he would pay attention to me. The days we all called boring. I wish for those boring days now. 

I had been outside in our back yard one night, I was listening to the crickets chirp and the rustling of the wind. The darker it got, the more my fears grew. The trees became dark and twisted, the wind howled from all directions, I was never sure where to listen for the danger. The crickets became haunting and fear would swoop in like a waterslide I was pushed down. The water moving too fast, too cold. All I could do was close my eyes and wait to be submerged. 

Then my mom would come outside and call me in for bed. All the trees became still and the wind settled down to a light breeze, the sound of the crickets began a melody on the radio that would sing me to sleep. 

She would wipe my tears of fear while I cried to her about the dangers of the night. She smiled and listened until I was simply clinging to her, listening to her heartbeat. “It’s just your imagination” she would say. “You only fear the night because you have yet to understand the beauty of the darkness” she would guide me back inside and tuck me into my princess themed bed. “It’s simply the fear of the unknown, Gabriella” 

She would run her hands through my hair and gesture out the window. I watched the tree sway in the wind and I pulled the blanket higher up to my chin. “One day the trees will bloom and make the wind sweet with the scent of flowers. The fireflies will come out and light the forest, making what may seem scary now, magical.” 

And there she was, lifting me out of the water I was submerged in as I thought I was going to die. 

She smiled softly at me as I looked out the window curiously. “Don’t forget that things are only scary because you haven't looked for the beauty. Nothing that sends chills through your body and leaves you frozen in terror will remain that way. You’re stronger than that” 

She always believed in me like that. She thought I was strong and capable. She always told me I could rule the world. Funny thing is, I thought that about her too.