The Mehndi Prince

With friends like these…

My door slams open, rattling on it hinges.

“Rise and shine, sweetheart!” Bellows Fennick. I crack my eyes open, the sunlight assaulting my eyes in the process. I hiss in pain as I burrow back beneath the covers. “If you could F@&k right off Fennick, and keep on f@&king off, that would be great! Much appreciated.” Is my muffled response.

Lighter booted footsteps make their way across the wooden floorboards into my room.

“Come on pansy ass, time for your morning beat down.” A feminine hand grabs my ankle under the bed covers and drags me out of bed. With a resounding thud I land buck naked on the floor.

“Ahhgg.. .my eyes” screeched Fennick. “Lyra, why would you do that to me”

“What! There’s nothing wrong with the view. Muscles for days. I mean look at that eight pack!” She gestures to my abdomen.“I could do the whole village’s washing on that.”

“Oh gods, my ears, they’re bleeding. La la la…I can’t hear you!” Yells Fennick with his eyes clenched shut and fingers in his ears like a toddler. Lyra chuckles and raises her voice “and the package, I bet that’s made more than a few women happy.”

“I think I’m going to be sick.” Gags Fennick. “Besides Lyra, I thought you were into women?”

“I am, but I can appreciate art.”

“Well, as thrilling as my junk is, can we please talk about something else?” I ask, as I go to the wardrobe to get dressed.

“How about the Duchess? She seems a little, …up tight.” States Lyra throwing a long, coiling ,tawny plait over her shoulder. In fact Lyra is tawny all over, skin, hair…,her eyes amber, it all kind of fits, as she is also a lioness.

“I tried to start a conversation with her for four hours, all I got was monosyllabic answers.” My answer slightly muffled as I pull the leather jerkin over my head.

“Maybe she’s just shy?” Suggests Fennick.

“And Achromatica is just a bit chilly, it’s not a frozen mountain chain” says Lyra her voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Now, now children. Do i need to separate you?” I tease as I finish dressing. “Let’s go and spar”

******

“Wait a minute, wait a minute, I need a drink of water” whines Fennick.

“Is he serious right now?” Lyra asks incredulously. I squint up at the sky, it’s almost midday. “I suppose we can call it quits, for now,” Lyra and I sit side by side outside the sparring ring, while Fennick shambles over to the well. The first bucket of water goes over his head, the second is guzzled in seconds. The third, he brings over to both of us.

“Don’t look now, but we’re being watched.” Murmured Fennick, as Lyra and I take turns of drinking.

“By whom?”

“Ice princess?” Guesses Lyra.

“Yep” replies Fennick emphasising the p.

“Well, at least she’s good looking,” states Lyra. Fennick just nods in agreement.

“You both know she can hear you, right?” They look at each other and shrug unconcerned whether they have offended the Duchess or not. I raise my voice to be heard over the other warriors fighting. “Care to join us Duchess?” With a slight inclination of her head, she makes her way gracefully over to where we are sitting.

“Why do you keep calling her a Duchess? I thought she was a princess?” Asks Fennick looking confused as he scratches his head. As she arrives I stand and bow over the offered hand, as per court protocol.

“Master Bear, His Grace, calls me Duchess because i am one. I’m also a princess. But as duchess is the higher rank, protocol demands that I am addressed by the higher title.” She instructs in imperial tones. My gods, all these “your grace’s” are going to be the death of me. “Master bear?” Lyra mouths silently beside me, with a look of distaste. My mouth twitches as I suppress a grin.

“Perhaps, as we are to be betrothed in a few days, you could call me Nero?” I suggest. “Do I have permission to address you by your given name?”

“Oi! Nero, why are you talking like that? You’re weirding me out, man!” Lyra punches Fennick in the gut playfully, “Because he’s speaking to a princess and doesn’t want to stuff up this alliance, i***t!” A hitting and slapping war commences between Fennick and Lyra. I sigh deeply and look at the Duchess. “Please ignore these two. I just hired them yesterday, because, I thought you would like me better if you thought I had friends.”

“d**k!”

“Arse!” Come the simultaneous retorts of Lyra and Fennick. The duchess raises her right eyebrow, clearly not amused by our antics.

“Yes, Nero. You may call me Neve.”