THE S£X CHRONICLES — 100 WAYS TO SIN

SUMMER HEAT WITH DADDY 7

LANA

I sat on the edge of my bed in the dark, staring at the letter I had written and rewritten three times. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. Even though I had planned exactly what I was going to say to Mom when she got home, the moment I heard her car pull up, every word disappeared from my head. I couldn’t go downstairs. I couldn’t look her in the eyes. Not after what I had done. Not after I had let her husband f**k me senseless on his desk, against the wall, on the floor covered in his c*m and still begging for more.

Did I regret it? No. Not even a little. If Dominic walked into my room right now and told me to spread my legs, I would gladly do it again without hesitation. I would ride him, choke on him, let him ruin me over and over. My body still ached in the best way, and every time I closed my eyes I felt him inside me. I had never felt more alive.

But the guilt… damn the guilt wouldn’t leave me alone. It sat heavy in my chest like a stone I couldn’t swallow. This was my mom. The woman who had always put me first, who called me every week just to hear my voice, who hugged me like I was still her little girl, who flew over to me Everytime I fell sick after the divorce. She trusted me. She trusted him. And I had betrayed her in the worst way possible.

A soft knock came on my door.

“Sweetheart? I’m back. Are you sleeping already?” Mom’s voice was gentle, tired from her long shift.

I swallowed hard, my throat tight. “Yes, Mom…” I dragged the words out slowly, trying to sound sleepy. “I had lots of fun today. I’m really tired. I’ll see you at breakfast, okay?”

There was a short pause. I could picture her standing there in her scrubs, probably still wearing her nurse shoes, smiling even though she was exhausted.

“Okay baby, but did you have dinner? I don’t want you going to bed hungry.”

Ever the loving, caring woman. Even after working a double shift, she was still worrying about me. Fresh guilt stabbed through my stomach.

“Yes Mom, I ate. Goodnight.”

“Love you, baby girl.”

The words hit me like a punch. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I couldn’t say it back. Not tonight. Not after I had f****d her husband and knew deep down I would do it again if I stayed. The silence stretched for a second too long.

“Love you too,” I finally whispered, so quiet I wasn’t sure she heard it.

Her footsteps moved away down the hall. I stayed sitting there, tears sliding down my cheeks. I cried quietly into my pillow until my eyes burned.

The next morning I woke up before the sun was fully up. My suitcase was already packed and waiting by the door. I had made the decision. I couldn’t stay here. Not for the rest of the summer. I would hurt Mom eventually. I know myself now. The pull toward Dominic was too strong, and I was too weak to fight it. So I was leaving. I was going back to Dad’s. Cutting this short before everything exploded.

I wrote the letter one last time, keeping it short and honest enough without destroying her:

Mom,

I’m sorry for leaving like this. Something came up with Dad and I need to go back early. Thank you for everything, hopefully I'll spend more time next summer. I love you more than you know. I’ll call you when I land.

Lana

I left it on the kitchen counter where she would see it first thing, right next to the coffee maker. Then I took one long look around the house. The living room where I first saw Dominic shirtless. The stairs I crawled up yesterday. The study door that was still slightly open. My chest tightened so hard it hurt.

I wheeled my suitcase outside quietly, closing the front door behind me with a soft click. The same kind of cab that brought me here was already waiting. I had booked the ride earlier. I climbed in, gave the driver the airport address, and didn’t look back as we drove away.

The whole ride to the airport I kept replaying everything in my head. The way Dominic kissed me like he was claiming me. The way he ate my p***y until I cried. The way he f****d me in every position, making me c*m so many times I lost count. I had never felt wanted like that. Never felt powerful and filthy and beautiful all at once. My ex had called me boring, and for a long time I believed him. But I wasn’t boring. I was just waiting for the right man to bring it out of me. Even if that man was my mother’s husband.

I left Miami a changed girl. I didn’t finish the summer vacation like I was supposed to, but I experienced more in those two nights than I had in my entire life. I was thoroughly f****d. I was wanted. I was ruined in the best possible way.

And one thing was sure, I was never going to be the boring girl my ex boyfriend tagged me as ever again.

The plane took off into the early morning sky, and I watched the city disappear below me, heart heavy but strangely free at the same time.

This summer had started with heartbreak.

It ended with me finally knowing exactly who I was.