Help me, won`t you?

Chapter 7: Munich Shadows and Hidden Jealousy

What on earth came over me? I have never acted like that before. Phone s*x? Seriously? But when Igor’s message lit up my screen—when he told me he missed me—it was like a dam broke inside my mind. For days, I had been agonizing over whether to text him first, trying to play it cool. Then came the endless cycle of seminars, conferences, and academic jargon that barely kept my romantic thoughts at bay.

And then, his message. I had just stepped out of the shower, feeling refreshed and bold. Looking at myself in the mirror, I felt beautiful, and a sudden, reckless impulse told me to share that with him. It started with a single photo, then led to his raw confessions, and before I knew it, I was caught in the heat of the moment myself. I never imagined that a conversation through a screen could make me feel that much.

Today was my first real day off. Since it was my first time in Germany, I decided to dedicate the day to Munich. The city greeted me with pleasant weather—patches of blue sky and drifting clouds. I started with the museums. The Alte Pinakothek was housed in a somewhat somber building for my taste, but the brochure promised nine thousand masterpieces. After several hours of immersing myself in the Venetian Renaissance, my stomach finally signaled that it was time for lunch.

I found a restaurant called "DeliDosa." It had a warm interior, soft music, and a welcoming atmosphere. I ordered a combo plate and a glass of the local beer the waiter highly recommended. As I waited, I watched the bartender expertly navigating the crowd, trying to anticipate every guest’s needs. I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice a man approaching my table.

"Forgive the interruption, but I believe we were at the same conference yesterday," he said. He looked to be in his early forties. He was of average height, with salt-and-pepper hair that gave him a certain air of sophistication. He wore neat glasses and a sharp grey suit with a white shirt, the top buttons undone to reveal a hint of his chest. He was handsome, objectively speaking, but he didn't stir a single spark in my soul.

"I think you’re right," I replied politely. I hadn't made many acquaintances during the seminars.

"Do you mind if I join you?"

"Not at all, please. I’ve already ordered, but we can call the waiter over if you’d like to eat."

"Thank you. I’m Ivan. And you are?"

"Elena. It’s always a pleasure to meet a fellow countryman here."

"The pleasure is all mine," he said, smiling. As I looked at him, I couldn't help but compare him to Igor. With this man, I was only willing to share a lunch and talk shop. Nothing more. "I see you’re taking in the sights today as well. Where have you been? If it's not a secret."

"Nothing unusual. Just the museum. Art and I aren't exactly a perfect match, but I thought it would be good for my general education."

"And where to next? Perhaps our plans align?"

I wanted to say, 'Sir, our paths are definitely not the same,' but I kept my manners. "Lunch first, then I’ll see where the day takes me."

The food arrived, and oh my god, the beer was incredible. I’m not usually a drinker, but this was on another level. The rest of the meal passed in comfortable silence; I wasn't in the mood for small talk, and he didn't push. Eventually, we realized we were staying at the same hotel and walked back together.

"Would you care to join me this evening? I was planning to visit the Botanical Garden. I heard the nature there is spectacular."

"I hope this is just a walk and not a date?" I asked, deciding to set the boundaries immediately.

"Even if it were a date, would you refuse?" Ivan asked, his tone becoming more personal. "Elena, I won't hide it—I like you. I’d like to get to know you better, perhaps moving from colleagues to something more serious."

"I don't go on dates," I said firmly. "I already have a man in my life. And as for 'serious,' we live in different cities. How would that even work?"

"People travel for love, Elena. One of us could move. It’s not an issue if the desire is there. I noticed you don't wear a ring... is it really that serious with him?"

That was enough. My patience snapped. "Move? Are you telling me you’d abandon your successful career and relocate to my city? I doubt it. And I certainly have no intention of leaving my job or my home. Everything suits me perfectly. And yes, it is very serious. We’re planning a wedding." A lie, yes, but a necessary one to end this.

"I see. I didn't mean to offend you," he said, backing off. "I understand. I’d still like to be friends, if you're open to it. As for the garden... the offer still stands."

"Alright," I sighed. "I’d like to see the garden."

Back in my room, I let out a long breath. Why was I so tense around him? I checked the time. It was 1 PM here, which meant it was 2 PM back home. Igor should be at his massage session now.

Me (1:04 PM): "Hi! How are you doing today?"

I decided to text him first. I was done running from my feelings. I felt a pang of guilt—I felt like I had abandoned him during the most difficult stage of his recovery. I needed to find him a more permanent doctor so I wouldn't be accused of a breach of ethics later. But did he want that? Did he see us as "us," or was I imagining the depth of our connection?

Igor (1:11 PM): "Hi, my darling. Getting ready for massage. I’ve been thinking about you all day. How are you? How’s the day off?"

Me (1:13 PM): "Taking in some sights. I’m resting now, but someone invited me to the Botanical Garden tonight. I’m in a dilemma: go see the flowers or stay in and think about you."

Igor (1:15 PM): "Should I start being jealous? Or can I hope it’s a group of girlfriends?"

Me (1:18 PM): "Your intuition is good. A male colleague invited me. But we’ve already cleared the air—it’s strictly a friendly outing. Don't worry, my thoughts are only on you."

Igor (1:23 PM): "Are you sure his intentions are just 'friendly'? I’m not there, Elena. I can't protect you. You know that, right?"

Me (1:25 PM): "I’ll be fine. I’ll only go for a couple of hours. I’ll call you the moment I’m back in my room so you don't worry. Remember, you’re not allowed to get stressed!"

Igor (1:26 PM): "Fine. I trust you. And I'll stay calm. I have to go now, but I’ll be waiting for your call. Kisses."

Me (1:27 PM): "Kisses. Miss you."

Knowing he was jealous made my heart swell. It meant he was just as invested in this as I was.

The walk through the Botanical Garden was breathtaking. The red "fluffy" flowers on the exotic trees were stunning, but the greenhouse was the true star. It was like traveling the world in an hour—cacti from the deserts, rice paddies from Asia, and a misty waterfall in an Amazonian jungle. We spent over two hours lost in the beauty of it. By the time I made it back to my hotel room, it was 10:30 PM. I lay down on the bed "just for a minute," and before I knew it, I was fast asleep, exhausted but happy.