Forbidden

t w e n t y - t w o

so basically I'm not going to release this until I've finished writing it because I'm kinda bad at updating because my life is an actual mess lol so the only character I've thought of so far is Ella who is portrayed by Leighton Meester, so if you have any other ideas of who I should cast to play the other characters then let me know and I'll pick some and cast them in! But then again I don't actually expect anyone to read this book because its quite shitso yeah once you read this most of this book will be published

Ella's POV;

I open the car door and slip inside whilst throwing my bag in the back seat.

"What's wrong El?" Mattie whispers.

"Just drive please," I say not even looking at him.

He doesn't say another word, just starts up the engine and drives.

The whole car journey consisted of us both sitting in silence, which was good because I didn't really want to talk.

I know I sound like I'm overreacting, but like Blake said, the partying s**t is important to me so I don't really give a s**t if I sound stupid.

We end up at his house and I quickly look over at my house to make sure no one is there before getting out.

Mattie takes my bag for me and unlocks the door to his house.

He places my bag on the floor and grabs my hand gently.

"Go upstairs, get changed into something more comfier, and come back down, I'll make you a cup of tea," He tells me before kissing my forehead.

I give him a thankful smile before grabbing my bag and heading up to his room.

I take out my makeup wipes and head to the bathroom.

I peel off my fake eyelashes before wiping the makeup from my face.

I splash a bit of water on my face and exit the bathroom, before stripping down into my bra and thong.

I root through my bag and find my pyjamas and start to put them on, when I see a plain white t-shirt hanging over a chair.

I walk over to it and pick it up before bringing it to my nose to sniff it.

It smelt exactly like Mattie.

A mix of peppermint and his favourite aftershave, Jean Paul Gaultier.

I unclasp my bra before slipping it off and throwing it in my bag, which failed completely because I missed by like a centimetre, causing it to land next to my bag.

I slip Mattie's white tee on and go downstairs.

I can hear him humming in the kitchen so I venture into there and hug him from behind.

He places one of his hands on mine and carries on making tea.

He turns around and raises his eyebrow at me.

"Yeah, I hope you don't mind I borrowed your t-shirt," I mumbled.

"It's fine baby, you look better in it than I do anyway," he smiles.

I give him a small smile and he points to the sofa before saying, "Make yourself comfy over there, I'll bring your tea in for you babe,"

I nod whilst slightly smiling and make my way over to the sofa before placing myself on it.

I cross my legs because that's my usual sitting position, and as I get comfy, Mattie enters the room holding 2 cups of tea and what looks like a packet of malted milk biscuits.

"They're my favourite," I say and he nods.

"I know, I do pay attention to the small details about you," he replies.

"Thank you," I say as he passes me my tea.

"You're more than welcome beautiful. Now, will you tell me what's got you so upset? I won't push you for an answer so don't feel like you have to, I just hate seeing you upset baby," he says gently.

How do I word it without sounding completely pathetic?

"It's rather stupid," I mumble and he shakes his head.

"Nothing's stupid if you're upset over it beautiful," he whispers before placing one of his large hands on my knee.

"Come on, tell me babe," he urges.

I know he's trying not to just shake me and demand what's upsetting me, because the more I get to know him, I figure he's very overprotective.

"I just don't want you to think I'm being stupid, then remember I'm actually technically a child," I whisper and look at my mug aimlessly.

I feel his large hand cup my jaw and gently turn my head so I'm facing him.

"I don't think that, I would never think that. You know I don't give a s**t about this age difference, and you know that's not the real reason that's stopping us from letting everyone know we're together. I love you okay? Nothing you ever say is stupid and I want you to tell me everything, even if you think it's silly, okay?" He tells me and I nod.

"0kay," I whisper.

I take a deep breath and start to explain the events that occurred tonight.

"So when I got to the party, I saw the guys and it was all fine, I had a couple of drinks and it was fine, then I saw a guy that I usually do shots with and he asked me to do them and I thought about it, but declined because, you know, and he kept asking, then I saw Donté and he was saying that he hoped I hadn't lost my touch because I'm the life of the party and that, and when I simply said no and walked off, I heard everyone jeering at me and saying I suck and stuff and I don't know it just made me feel shitty." I finish saying and I look to see Mattie staring at me and taking in every word I'm saying.

"So explain to me why you didn't do the shots and why it made you feel shitty," he said and I shot him a look.

"I'm just trying to understand you as much as possible baby," he soothes me and I nod.

"Well, erm, I didn't do the shots because I promised you I'd only have a couple of drinks, and there was no way I was going to break that promise. And it made me feel shitty because I've been going to these sorts of parties since I was like 14, and I was always the party animal. I never really had a great deal of friends at school, but that never bothered me because I would meet loads at parties so it sort of made me feel a part of something. Whenever I was having a s**t day, I'd just go to a party to drink, forget about everything and just unwind and have fun. It sounds stupid I know, but you know how some people have different things that are important to them? Yeah well this is my thing. And when everyone was disappointed in me for not doing the shots it made me feel like s**t because of all that," I wrap up my speech finally, and sip my tea.

"It's not stupid at all. Like you said different people have different things that are important to them. Babe, you can do what you want, it's your life. I don't expect you to do or give up anything for me, you deserve to live your life. Yes I don't like you drinking because of I know what some pricks are like when they drink and I couldn't bear the thought of someone hurting you, but at the same time I realised I can't tell you what to do. You're not an i***t, you've got your head screwed on. You want my advice? Next time you go to a party, you go in there and you show them why you were called the life of the party, then they can't say s**t," he finishes saying and I grin.

"That's fake advice coming from you. What's your real advice?" I ask and he grins.

"My real advice would be to not go to parties again and stay at home so I know you're safe, but you're not going to listen to my real advice so I brought the fake advice out instead," he smirks.

"Thanks for the fake advice, your real advice is s**t," I grin and he chuckles.

"I love you so much Ella," he says quietly whilst staring at me.

"I love you so much too Mattie. Thank you for tonight Mattie - actually screw that, thank you for everything, I really am grateful," I reply.

"What would I do without you?" He whispers.

"Be bored as f**k?" I grin and he laughs.

"Seriously though Ella, it's scary how in love with you I am,"

"I know it is because I feel the same way with you," I answer.