Just Throw In the Towel

Chapter 4

- I’m out now and I’ll see you in the parking lot. -

- Great! See u soon :) -

The boy had finished reading the text message and stuffed the phone back into his pocket. Oh this is gonna be so cool. Man, Hilary’s so awesome, he thought. It was surprisingly easy to ask her out. Quite literally, all he had to do was just ask.

He remembered how it happened; he had bumped into her in the practice room as he was looking for ways to pass the time (yet again). He saw those hazel eyes looking at him as he opened the creaky, wooden door to his usual nesting ground. After a few minutes of friendly banter, he breaks the underlying tension.

“Hey, I hope this isn’t too forward, but can I ask what you’re doing tomorrow night?”

“I just have a class I need to submit a requirement for, but I’ve got time to hang out.”

“I was thinking about dinner.”

“Sounds good.”

(pause, eyes blinking in disbelief) “Good! Oh that’s… awesome. Thanks so much!”

Sounds good.

The response hit him like a car out of nowhere. There was no tension or feelings of apprehension, the way overly campy anime’s had him believe. All this time he thought there was supposed to be some kind of cathartic release and melodrama, like the cheesy Spanish telenovelas that sometimes played on the TV at his favorite burrito place on Divisadero.

It was interesting to note that he had technically lived in the Bay Area longer than she did, but she offered to drive, because she knew a nice place to have dinner. She drove an old, dark blue Jeep Cherokee; a secondhand, piece of junk that kept breaking down every forty miles or so. He sees her waiting in the parking lot next to it and walks towards her.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey,” she replies. Her reply was a little higher pitched. Today, she wore the same outfit that she had on the first day they met. There was something about the way she looked at him that made him wonder, gosh she’s really pretty. But what’s with that look on her face?

He didn’t have a lot of experience interacting with girls (with people, generally speaking) to base his hunch on, but he thought it looked funny. Like a combination of: slightly shifty, a hint of malice and… horny? Maybe. They get in the Jeep.

He wasn’t sure where they were going. All he knew was that the trains stopped working at 10 PM and he’d be pretty screwed if they decided to spend a lot of time together that evening. They continue to talk about life, school, music and a little bit of everything and nothing on the way to whatever place she had in mind. She had plans she wanted to pursue back in Texas. He was adamant about finishing a degree in music, despite all the cautioning his family incessantly bugged him about. She wanted to finish making a CD with Ella. He wanted to try his hand at music conservatory.

After losing themselves in conversation for about eleven minutes, he stops to notice his surroundings and finds that they’ve stopped at an intersection riddled with SF Muni tracks. He notices the street sign, “West Portal”. He’s never been here before. But it was a quaint-looking neighborhood, even for San Francisco. The time was 4 or 5 PM. It was a colder day today with the fog setting in. It was getting dark, but he could still see the rows of mom-and-pop shops down the street. Old, Victorian-style townhouses, with small trees interspersed throughout the neighborhood. This is probably one of the many reasons so many people have such a hard-on for San Francisco, he thought.

She drives up past the intersection and begins to park. He makes a comment about how nice the place is, and they both walk into the restaurant.

And for the next few hours, they enjoy each other’s company.

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The wine was good, the pasta was fine, and the company was just perfect. I’m feeling so high, right now, he thought. This was the highest he had ever felt in such a long time. Probably, ever. There’s this fine girl right in front of me and the whole scene from the car ride all the way up until now has felt like something right out of a chick flick. God, I’m going to lose it.

It was time to leave. Any later, and he would have had to spend a fortune for a cab ride home. They pay for the tab and exit.

The night is as cold as it is enchanting. The halogen street lights seem to glow just a little bit brighter and they could see their breath. It was the kind of evening where just about anything could happen. All this needs is for it to be December and for snow to start falling, and it’s an absolute Christmas wet dream, he fantasized. They were now standing on the platform and waiting for the next tram. She had offered to bring him to the Muni stop so he could catch the last BART train out, and pay for it.

While he went to university in the city, he lived in a rented room miles away in Antioch. Technically, it was about an hour BART ride away from his usual stop to Antioch. And right now, it felt like an eternity away.

They were alone together… and he didn’t really know what came next. She’s right there man, and she’s just waiting for you to make a move. He didn’t know when the next tram was coming, but he had a sinking feeling it was soon. She isn’t looking at you. But she’s waiting.

He then heard what sounded like faint rumbling coming from the tracks on his right side.

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This is fine.

I’m not hurting anyone.

I’m alright.

I’m almost asleep. I can feel it.

I’m good.

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A hand reaches out to place itself on the back of her neck.

She turns and meets his eyes. They’re alert, but relaxed. “Hi,” he says as he leans in. She smiles as she tries to answer, but he doesn’t let her.

He draws her in close.

He purses his lips slightly.

And, for a few seconds, he’s never felt more sure of himself at any other point in time than right now.

And the last thing he sees is her face as he closes his eyes.

And loses himself in a sea of warmth.