Chapter 7: The Choice I Never Made.
543 Words
Elena POV
The applause does not come as directed to me.
It falls upon the auditorium like waves, loud and bright and conclusive. I am standing in the shadows and close to the back wall, with my hands covering my elbows, observing a girl in pale blue bowing on stage.
My bow.
Her smile is wide, confident. She appears as though she fits in there. The lights reflect the glitter of her dress and make her something unreal like I was once.
The tension of my chest increases when the audience stands up.
I clap once.
Then I stop.
I do not stay till the end curtain. I will not want to see her wet in what I dropped. I sneak out the side door, and the cold is alerting my face with the second touch.
My feet crunch on the snow as I pass across the deserted courtyard. My breath is weak, disjointed. I smack my palm on my sternum as I am able to keep myself together.
“Elena.”
I freeze.
Daniel is out in the streetlight, unzipped jacket, wet hair, glaring eyes. It still appears that he has not fully forgotten his stadium noise, which has stuck to him.
“I was looking for you,” he says. “You weren’t at the game.”
“I know.” My voice sounds distant. Not angry. Not soft. Just tired.
What are you doing here he asks, looking at the auditorium. “I thought you quit.”
The term quit cuts deeper than he is likely to intend it to.
“I didn’t,” I say. “I just stopped being there.”
He steps closer. “We won. Scouts were there. It was insane.” He is smiling, reflexively, as though it was good news that I was to take. “I got an offer.”
The world seems to tilt.
“An offer?” I repeat.
“Yeah.” With a sigh he rubs his hair. “Full ride. After graduation.”
I look beyond him, at the snow lying on the steps, at the light which streams through the stage doors behind me.
“That’s great,” I say.
But my voice cracks.
He notices then. Really notices. “Hey. What’s wrong?”
I shake my head. “Nothing.”
“Elena—”
I ought to leave, I say hastily, moving aside. My heel slips on the ice. He touches me with fingers, instinctively.
“Wait.” His grip tightens. “Talk to me.”
I finally meet his eyes. I have just seen another person dancing my future.
His face scowls, his face growing puzzled. “What does that have to do with—”
“With this?” I cut in, gesturing between us. “With you?”
The falling of the snow is harder now, gentle yet unceasing.
He opens his mouth. Closes it.
It was not my decision, I say inwardly. “I just let it happen.”
Between us the words are suspended, words weak and threatening.
Daniel swallows. “Elena… we’ll figure it out.”
I retreat once more, where he can no longer reach me.
I don’t know if I believe him.
And that frightens me more than all.
- Writer
