A Luna Scorned

chapter 18

I sat on my bed, eating my steak and watching TV. Suddenly there was a knock on my door.

"Riley". I stepped away from the door so he could come in.

"Hey Ky." He came in and sat down in the chair. "I saw you grab a plate of food then disappear. Just wanted to check in on you."

"Oh, yeah. I didn't feel like witnessing the Liam and Rachel show, so I thought it would be nice to do dinner in my room."

"Look, Ky, I'm really sorry about Liam. I told him if he doesn't ditch Rachel he's going to lose you."

"You don't need to apologize for him. He's making his own choices. He's free to do so. But I'm not going to sit here and wait for him to decide he wants me. Actually, can I ask a favor of you?"

"Yeah. Sure."

"I want my own home. I want to move out of the pack house. Is that something you can do for me?"

"Liam won't like that."

"Does he have to know? I don't want anyone to lie to him, but does he have to know it's for me?"

"He's going to know if you move out of the pack house."

"Would he really though? I don't think he'd know or care, honestly."

"Well, I'll see what I can do, but no promises."

"Thanks Riley. I know it's asking a lot from you, but I appreciate you trying."

"Sure thing. Hey look, I know it's tough seeing Liam and Rachel together, but don't be a stranger at meals."

"I won't. It's actually getting easier to see them together."

"That's not good."

"No. It is. I am beginning to accept that he is choosing Rachel. He convinced me to go out on a date with him, then the second he sees Rachel, he bails on me. How much more of a sign do I need?"

"Well, I'll talk with him."

"No. Please don't. I want him to follow his heart, and what he wants. I don't want him to feel forced into being with me. If anything, I wish he'd just reject me already so I can go home."

"He doesn't want to reject you. He wants to be with you. But for some reason the i***t keeps falling back to Rachel."

"It is what it is, Riley. I don't want to interfere, and I'm asking you not to either. He's making his choice and I just need to wait it out until he marks her or rejects me, whichever happens first, then I can go home. I'm a patient person. I do hope it happens sooner than later, though."

"I'm sorry, Ky. This has to suck. I know it would be for me if I were in your shoes."

"C'est la vie".

"What does that mean?"

"Such is life. I'm not going to let it bother me. I mean, it hurts. I'm not going to lie. But there isn't anything I can do about it without feeling like I'm forcing him to choose me. And I don't want him to feel forced into choosing me. He doesn't want me, and that's fine."

"He does want you."

"As a side piece to Rachel." I spat out rather aggressively. Riley looked shocked.

"Well, I was just making sure you're okay. I'm here for you if you need anything, or just want to talk. Ari and Cole too."

"Thanks Riley." I closed the door and went back to my dinner.

Tonight was another night alone watching horror flicks. This one was actually bothering me a little. It's always the ones that are more realistic. Like someone living in your walls, or being kidnapped at a hotel. Those ones could actually happen. The hack 'em up, stalker who chases you all over town and knows your every move before you make it, not so scary. I was startled by a knock at my door. It almost sent me flying out of my bed. I paused the movie and looked at the clock. It was past midnight. Why on earth would anyone be knocking on my door at midnight? I cracked my door open just enough to peek my head out.

"Liam?" I questioned. He was standing in the dark hall with his arm across my doorway.

"Hey." Hey? Really? That was the best he could come up with. I didn't say anything, I just stood there, not moving to allow him into my room.

"I sensed that you were having a rough night. Is everything alright?" Stupid mate bond. He must have been able to sense my fear from the movie.

"Yes. I'm fine. I was just watching a scary movie."

"Oh." He said. This was probably the most awkward conversation I've had in a long time.

"Yeah. So….thanks for checking on me. I'm going to get back to my movie." I said as I closed the door. I didn't mean to be rude, I just had about as much time for him as he had for me, which was none. He knocked on my door again. I opened it and stuck my head out.

"I know it's late, but can we talk?"

"I'm really pretty tired. I'm actually just going to go to bed." I faked a yawn.

"Oh, um...okay." He sighed.

"So...goodnight." I began to close the door, but he thrust out his hand, stopping it from closing.

"Can I come in? I'd really like to talk, even if just for a minute."

"Is Rachel busy tonight?" I couldn't stop the words from slipping off my tongue.

"No she's...oh." He finally caught the meaning. "I probably deserved that."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude." I really didn't. But I don't have time for this. Not tonight anyway. "Look, I'd really like to just go to bed."

"Kyrie, please." I sighed and opened the door, motioning for him to enter.

"Woah". His eyes widened as he took in my appearance. I had on silky, bodysuit pajamas. My butt hung out the shorts, and my boobs popped out of the top. It was not really appropriate attire for receiving guests in. I hurried over to my dresser and slipped on a sweatshirt and hopped into bed.

"You didn't have to do that. I thought you looked amazing." He closed my door, locking it behind him. Making his way to the end of my bed, he sat down by my feet. I pulled them up, my knees in my chest, and wrapped my arms around my legs. He let out a heavy sigh.

"I'm sorry." He finally mumbled.

"Sorry for what?"

"I haven't been very considerate of you since you've been back." I didn't say a word. "Riley had a long chat with me earlier". I rolled my eyes. I had specifically asked him not to say anything to Liam. He must have left my room and went straight for Liam. See if I ever tell him anything again. "I have been thinking about what he said."

"Liam, you don't need to apologize. You're hanging out with who you want to be around. You want a relationship with Rachel. That's fine. You don't need to feel sorry for that. I don't know what Riley said to you, but it probably shouldn't have been said. The only reason you should be here right now, is to reject me. You also shouldn't be sorry about that. So, can we please get it over with so I can go home? That's all I'm asking you for." A look of sadness crossed his face. He fiddled with his hands in his lap.

"Oh man Nat, this is it. He's actually going to reject us." My stomach was in knots as my nerves came unraveled. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.

"No. He won't. Colt won't allow it."

"Colt can't really control it!"

"He can't reject us!" Natalie was just as fearful as I was.

"He can. It's coming. I know it is. Get ready Nat."

"I don't want to reject you, Kyrie."

"It's fine. Really. I'll be fine. I want you to be happy. You are happy with Rachel. I don't want you to feel like you're being forced into a relationship. By choosing me, I would always feel like you were forced. Whether by me, or Riley or the stupid mate bond. It wouldn't be true happiness." He mulled over what I said for a while.

"Kyrie, when I was with you that day at the lake, I was happy. Truly happy. I haven't been down there in years. Rachel doesn't enjoy that sort of stuff. She's not into the outdoors. She trains with the pack, and that's the most outdoorsy she gets. Although, I don't believe she'd ever fight if we had to. You reminded me of what I love to do. I gave up a lot of myself for Rachel. She enjoys shopping and hanging out at the mall, watching chick flicks and doing her nails and stuff like that. I have always given up what I liked to do because she never enjoyed it. She'd always whine about how dirty she'd get, or how much she hated that sort of thing. It was easier for me to just not do it." He finally looked at me. "I love Rachel. I would be lying if I said I didn't. I probably always will. But being back at the lake, with my family, with you...it made me realize how much I missed me. Doing the things I enjoyed. It made me realize Rachel isn't the one for me."

"Well, the lake was two days ago. You have been pretty cozy with Rachel since then. I'm asking you not to feed me lines to get me in bed. I'm not falling for that again." I snapped.

"What do you mean falling for that again?"

"The first time we slept together. You fed me a bunch of crap you thought I wanted to hear just so you could sleep with me, then you bailed and went straight for Rachel, treating me like a side piece."

"That's not what that was."

"Could have fooled me." I shot back.

"Riley said you wanted to move out of the house into your own?"

"Yeah. I'd like my own space."

"You have your own space. You have this room."

"I know, and thank you. But I'd like more privacy in my own home."

"You mean you want to be able to not see the Liam and Rachel show all day?" Damn that Riley. He seriously told Liam everything. "Hey, don't be mad at Riley. He came to me asking about the house only. He was pretty upset with me, and I ordered him to tell me why. You were supposed to come to me when you were feeling this way though, remember?"

"I do. But after you bailed on me I didn't think you'd really care."

"Sorry for bailing. It's just Rachel…"

"Stop!" I demanded. "No more, "Well Rachel was feeling sad" excuses. She was more important to you than our date. That's totally fine, but I'm done with the excuses."

"But it's not fine. I should never have bailed on you. Can I make it up to you? Let me take you shopping tomorrow."

"No. I don't need to go."

"But you do. You said you did."

"I went on my own." He looked completely crushed.

"I'm so sorry, Kyrie." We sat in silence for a time. I could tell Liam was really thinking about the last few days, and regretted how he had been treating me. "I'm done with Rachel. I promise."

"Yeah, I've heard that one before." I rolled my eyes.

"This isn't going to be easy, but I'm going to fight for you. To prove to you that you're the one I want."

"You don't even know me." My aggression was bad tonight. I'm usually pretty good at keeping calm and collected.

"Let's change that. I know you hate heights, I'm assuming you enjoy scary movies. Right?"

"I do."

"So, can I stay and watch it with you?" I wanted to say no. I wasn't into this whole, Rachel is busy so I'll hang out with Kyrie until Rachel is back, thing. But I did really want to be with him. I wanted to feel him, I needed his touch desperately.

"Won't Rachel be lonely?"

"Maybe. But I don't really care." His eyes pleaded with me, and I finally broke.

"Fine. But no funny stuff." I said as he laughed, but I was dead serious. He scooted in the bed next to me and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his chest.

"Is this okay?" He asked.

"Yes." I definitely didn't mind being close to him.

"So, what are we watching?"