My External Love

chapter Ten:

Lillian: “ tip! snap! toss! ha...ha! ” I breathed heavily as I ran through the forest, the chilly cold air of the woods brushing against my skin freezing it, “ haa! dumb! ” I screamed as I came in contact with the forest floor, blood flowed out from my newly bruised hands and wounds, my face stained with dirt and my hair all messy and tangled due to it's contact with the air, leaves and branches, my head aching seriously, with support from my hands on the ground, I slowly raised my pounding head and looked forward, the forest was like a void, I couldn't see ahead nor see behind me, it was pitch black and all I could do was hope the moon comes out soon to light up my path, it's really dark in the woods during night time and am at the mercy of mother nature not to be eaten by wild animals before dawn, I managed to get up slowly and leaped forward with my hurting foot and stained satin gown, I was trying my very best to run but it wasn't easy for me because each step I took made my body ache badly, each step was painful but I had to continue if I want to survive this night and live, I can't really comprehend all what I have been through these passed few days most especially today!, it has been one of a kind that even my mouth can't find the right words to use to explain it, my brain has gone blank from all today's events and am hoping they will all come to an end soon, as I remembered a few of these events, I couldn't help but feel hopeless as I recall it all....................

( Flashback to when Lillian and her dad were left alone in the dressing room)

I looked at my dad and am sure there's something else doing on with him,

“ dad is everything okay? ”

I asked concerned, he smiled sweetly and walked forward, standing close to me, he held my hands in his and looked me in the eyes and said,

“ Lillian there isn't much time to waste, I won't sit and let them decide your fate for you, we don't have enough time now, so please just listen and comply with me okay princess! ”

I couldn't understand all what he's saying and before I could open my mouth to say something, the door flew open and thus my attention drifted from dad to the door, a Lady cloth in a big and brown robe from head to toe stood at the door, she had on a bat mask covering her face and she had a piece of black thick clothing on her hands, she walked forward and stood behind my dad just a few meters away from the door, then she slightly bows her head in greeting, looking at her now, judging from her smooth and shining skin, I doubt she's a servant but still something tells me she's not a noble too, I turned my gaze from her to dad, I needed to know what this is about,

“ dad what's............. ”

he cut me short by saying,

“ I won't sit and let them take away your life from you, I promised your mom to protect you and am never going to break that promise, I will do my all to make sure you are safe and happy no matter what princess, we will buy you some time while you escape the mansion, change out of the wedding dress and wear something light and cover up with this robe, remember our old secret tunnel we normally used to snick out of the mansion when you were younger!..........”

he kept on saying while I looked on in disbelieve and surprise,

“ head there and follow it out of the mansion and the exit is behind the mansion, Mary is waiting for you there and will inform you of what to do next, so hurry up dear, we don't have enough time to waste, so please go get ready ”

he said and held my shoulder in a comforting way, it's normal for nobles or royals to try and escape their forced fates such as these, in order to escape safely and peacefully, they make use of a special group known as the ‘Exiled group’ in perfecting their escape, the job of this group is to buy time for them to escape far away before it comes to the notice of their family or others but if they are caught, the consequences are severe, I heard that some a arrested or given home arrest for mouths or years depending on the family's decision, thus imprisoning them and limiting their movements to their rooms, some are exiled from their family or stripped off of their wealth or resources, making them to start again from the scratch, in some cases, some are even worse, I can't believe we are about to take that risk and dad plans to bear it all alone, I looked at the lady again and am sure she's of them and that means that the rest should be in the wedding hall, waiting for their signal, I looked at dad, my heart is heavy and I can't let him risk all this,

“ dad, please let's talk about this, the risk is..”

he points his finger on my lips, cutting me short,

“ Princess I won't let them ruin your future and fate just because of their own benefits, there's no one on earth that will decide your path except you, I will never let them have their way”

“dad but the risk and I........”

I tried saying something but he cut me short again, held my shoulders softly and said,

“ don't worry about me princess, I have plans and I promise I will come along later, there's no need for you to worry about that but yourself, your safety is my goal and your happiness is mine too, you get to choose who you want to live with, so I won't let them marry you off to that ‘ Mic...helle’ or whatever his name is okay ”

he said waving his hand in a funny way, I smiled at his display, it's amazing to see that he still got jokes up his sleeves to make me laugh despite our current situation, I stare at the one who has been my pillar all my life,

“ but dad it's........”

he then again cut me short and said

“ there's no but princess, let's not waste anymore time, go and change ”

“ okay dad...but promise....( sobs)....that you will..(sniffs)..be fine...okay!”

I said admits sobs, my emotions were taking over and am embarrassed that we're in front of a stranger but I cared not,

“hmm”

dad smiled and uses his finger to wipe my tears,

“ yes dear, I promise ”

he laughed and uses his finger to lift my chin,

“ you looked as beautiful as your mom but in your own way, am sure she's proud of you and will want you to choose your own path, just like I want you too, so promise us you will ”

he said looking into my eyes, tears falls freely on my face as I smiled admits sobs and respond,

“ yes.. I(sniffs).. promise..I...will(sniffs) ”

I said and he smiled sweetly and pulled me into a hug, it's embarrassing to do this in front of a stranger but we don't care about her presence,

“ thank you so much daddy, I promise I will follow my own path, so please stay safe”

I said while resting my head on his chest, this will our goodbye embrace for the now.

( End of flashback)

( presently)

My eyes teared up once again, it kept on pouring out tears not minding my heart beat or health, they all flowed down while I bothered not about wiping them off, I was in deep pains both internally and externally, I never wanted this or planned for this, if these were the consequences of not marrying Michael or rather I say the Duke then I would have freely accepted, even if it were the both of them or for the worst purpose known to mankind, I would have still accepted just to avoid all this and the pain, I clearly recall how it all ended like this and more tears falls down my face.............

( flashback to when Lillian had escaped the mansion peacefully with Mary)

I and Mary had successfully escaped the mansion and we entered a carriage heading to the other side of town, we followed the forest path to avoid being seen by people, along the way, Mary had informed me about what the so called marriage was really all about, how it was nothing more than a deal between two greedy men, saying and shocked is an understatement but still I shouldn't expect less from a family with no connection or love but just same blood flowing in our veins, it's not surprising how much family betrays and treats each other like enemies even more than strangers, me and Mary were discussing about how we will move out of town for the mean time until things calmed down when suddenly the carriage came to an halt and the horse and driver cries were heard,

“ ha, what's doing on Mary, who's attacking the carriage and the driver?”

I asked while trying to sit properly due to the sudden stop, I could hear the driver struggling with some people who were shouting but I didn't hear what exactly they were talking about, Mary sat still and drew her head close to the window in order to hear what exactly was going on, soon the shouting got louder and both Mary and I got scared, it's almost sunset and we are still in the woods not even close to the nearest village,

“ my Lady, I think these people are bandits, it's strange for them to be here by this time and in these part of the woods but please do as I say, I will try to talk to them and persuade them but if nothing works, please make a run for it into the woods, please do as I say my Lady”

Mary said as she stood up to leave, something felt strange about this so I held her hand,

“ Mary please hold on, we can't take the risk and do that, let's wait or rather find a way to escape from them, it doesn't just makes any sense that these people appeared out of nowhere ”

I said trying to convince her to stay but she insisted saying that,

“ my Lady nows not the time to fear, we already came this far and I know that by now the family would have known we escape, so we can't afford to waste time now and get you to safety, I will go now so please do just as I say ”

she attempted to leave but I held her back again,

“ Mary there's no need for this, I won't let you risk your life for this, we will find another way to get out of here safe and sound okay so please don't be in a hurry and think this through ”

I said with pleading eyes, she smiled and responded,

“ and what about Lord Lucas my Lady?”

I was speechless at the mention of my dad,

“ he risked it all just for you to escape that place and now that we have an issue at hand, you want to follow the easy way out, I believe my Lady knows what will happen if we get caught too, I will be punished, flogged or rather sold even worse killed, my Lady, you will be forced to marry again, be it Michelle or someone else worse and Lord Lucas, your father will not be left out, just think about the consequences of turning back now, the bandits are here for one thing and that's money, so please let me go and talk with them, am sure they will let us be but still please do make a run for it if it all goes south ”

she finished saying and walked forward but still I held on to her hand, she turned and said,

“ please remember who you are my Lady and act like one”

she drew away her hand from me and walked out of the carriage to meet the bandits who were still fighting with the driver, I heart grew heavy along with my breath, those who I loved and cherish are sacrificing their life for me and...and am so powerless to even lift a finger but hide in a corner and watch them silently in fear, I clenched my fist together as I groan in pain and hurt, first dad and now Mary, I shut my eyes in rage, I just can't let all these happen, am not like those nobles who hides under people's shadows, I refuse to sit by and watch, I must do something even if it kills me, I open my eyes sharply and walked out of the carriage in confidence, even if this is my downfall, I won't let them drown in my place, I got down from the carriage and unto the road, I can see clearly that we are in the middle of the forest and how dense it is, the sound of metals hitting against one another and voices of Mary and the driver pleading filled my ears, I walked slowly along the side of the carriage and stopped at the end, I peeked from there to see what was happening, I knew too well what will happen if these people were to find out that a noble was present here, it will be a whole different story for the bad, as I peeked, I could see all their faces, there were both the old and young among them and they had on rags as cloths on their pale bodies, am sure that they are just poor but greedy bandits who hold no threat or whatever so ever buy why they are here and how they got here I quite difficult to comprehend, they had Mary and the driver on their knees pleading for them to be speared and allowed to go, one of the men in a hat steps forward and said,

“ oh come on now lady, don't tell me that you got no gold with you, we are not here to play mates or are we?”

he asked no one in particular, his crew members were just smirking where they stood holding onto their various small weapons like cutlass, knife and the rest, Mary and the driver didn't say anything but had their head bowed in fear, even if they look powerless, they are still bandits after all and this wasn't a funny event,

“ hey man, where's the money or food items you both are running with heh, where is it!”

he yelled and Mary answered,

“ we don't have any sir, this is just an empty carriage we were going with, there's nothing there, please believe me”

she said while kneeing with her head bowed, I felt bad that she had to do this all because of me and even the poor driver whose innocent and just trying to earn ends meet, as I turned my gaze back to the bandits, he moved close to Mary, placed his hand under her chin and uses his hand to roughly raise her face up to look at him,

“ you sure about that young lady, you don't even look bad for a servant, am sure you can still give us something in return for no gold”

he smirks like a pervert and his fellow bandits laughed and smirks along with him, I cursed under my breath, irritated by their dirtiness and smelling attitude, I can see clearly that Mary isn't comfortable but I knew too well to act rash, I stood where I was, making sure not to make a single noise, I was thinking about what to do to help when suddenly something flashy caught my eyes from the side, I turned towards the direction and what I saw left me speechless, the mansion's guards with touch lights and guarding dogs were walking in the woods very close to where we were, I stood speechless and glued in the spot, how did they get here, when and what.... dad.. what happened to dad, before I could even think about anything, I heard one of the palace guards shout at the bandits,

“ hey you there, stop what you are doing now!”

his shout gained everyone's attention and I could see disbelieve, shock and surprise on everyone's faces, Mary stood up sharply, with fear visible on her face and the bandits too had great fear and surprise on their faces, the driver laid face down on the ground shaking visibly of fear, without warning Mary turned towards the carriage and yelled,

“ my Lady please run now!”

her yelling caught the attention of the bandit close to her and as he turned to look at who she yelled for, his eyes met mine and the disbelieve on his face was beyond any other,

“ so you had a noble with you all this while!”

he yelled loudly and hit Mary on the head with the end of his short knife which he held onto before, Mary fell hard on the ground but still in speed she raised her head up and yelled at me again with her loudest voice,

“ my Lady please run now! run run now!”

her voice resounded in my head as my legs moved, my eyes tear up and my heart pounding in pain and fear, I moved away from the carriage,

“ hey it's the Lord's daughter, grab her!”

one of the approaching guards yelled at the top of his voice and soon the rest starts running with their huge dogs towards my direction, I felt the whole world tremble at my feet, it was all coming to an end but luckily for me, my legs took control of my body as my brain was too occupied at the moment, I ran away from my spot, running towards the trees close by but all of a sudden, a guard appeared from nowhere and tried grabbing me, just at the moment when I thought it's finished, I closed my eyes shut waiting for what will happen to happen, I felt nothing but instead, something heavy dropped on the ground, I opened my eyes only to see that the driver is holding the guard down on the ground, he was struggling to hold down the guard but still he raised his head and yelled,

“ your grace please go now, go now..run!”

“ run!!! my Lady run!”

Mary also yelled out to me from her spot, some guards were already with them, making the bandits to knee with their hands up holding their heads while two held Mary, preventing her from escaping but she's struggling with them and yelling at the top of her voice for me to run, I breathe heavily as it dawn on me that I'll have to leave them behind and run by myself,

“ my grace go go now! ”

the driver said again and I cried as I ran into the forest, tears flowing freely as I run,

“ don't let her escape, catch that Lady ”

one of the guards yelled and I turned my head backwards once more and I could see that another guard approached the driver and hit him hard on the head, making he collapse on top the one he was holding down, I screamed as I faced front and increased my steps, if they catch me, then it's all over and all their sacrifices will all be a vain, I could hear the guards and dogs give chase after me and I couldn't help but feel like a loser as I run deeper into the forest.

( End of flashback)

( presently)

I miss dad, Mary, my comfort zone and I miss mom, “ haul! ” a Wolf's haul was heard and it echoed through the forest, making all the lesser animals run to their hideout and I looked up only to see that the moon was out and shining bright, it illuminated the forest and my path a little and I knew I had to increase my pace if I want to avoid the unpredictable but I drew weaker by the second with my whole body aching, “ tis! boo!! snap!! fum...fum!! ” sounds of fast running animals, heavy breaths and huge force echoed through the forest and was heading towards my direction, I needed no prophet to tell me I was being chased by a pack of wolfs, I then tried increasing my speed and ignoring all the pain but boy was I like a snail running from it's predators, their running sounds soon became louder as time went by and their full force could be heard all through the forest, the trees shook at their force and birds took to flight from the respective trees due to the disturbance, it grew louder and louder till they were eventually really close to my me, I cried out more tears as this seems to be the end of my so called life on Earth, With a trembling heart and feet, I fell yet again to ground with no more strength to run or move but a will to live, I sobbed quietly on the floor while the wolfs approached me then begin to form a cycle around me but just then I felt a presence, with my red teary eyes and drenched face with strands of my hair, my pale skin and wounded body, I managed to look up, I didn't see a face but a dark figure or shadow moving in the dark, with the little strength I have left in me, I stretched out my right hand towards the shadowing figure then said weakly with a cracked voice “ please help ” then I passed out...