Regrets

Chapter Two-2

When we finished the museum tour, it was mutually decided to find someplace to have lunch. There was a restaurant in the museum. But upon inspection, we collectively decided it was too much like a high school cafeteria. We decided to go in search of a more upscale eatery.

As we were getting into the car, John said that he knew of a restaurant that is considered one of the best in Raleigh. “All of the lawyers, legislators and local professionals in Raleigh eat there,” he said. We drove a few blocks to East Martin Street where the restaurant was located. There was a parking lot directly across the street. On street parking was practically non-existent, since it was lunch time and the restaurant was located in the center of the city.

When we entered the facility, the maître d’ showed us to a table for four in a corner that allowed us some privacy. The waiter approached our table and took our drink orders. As we were sitting there our conversation turned to the museum tour we had just completed. I was amazed that since Raleigh is geographically located in the middle of the Confederacy, there hadn’t been any battles fought in or around the city.

“Raleigh was the hub of supplies for the Confederate Army,” Julia said.

As we continued our Civil War conversation, my hand was resting on my knee next to Julia. In the middle of her being animated in conversation, she let her hand be placed over mine and held it in a tight grip. I concluded that Julia was sending me a covert signal that she was interested in taking our friendship to another level. I admit that I was new at having a relationship with a woman. Julia was the first woman whose hand I have ever held. I wasn’t sure that I had the time in my busy academic schedule to make a place for Julia. She was a beautiful, young, and intelligent woman. If I were ever to get involved romantically, I couldn’t ask for a more perfect choice. Sitting there surrounded by a restaurant full of people, I made an off the cuff decision to let the situation with Julia play itself out. I also knew that once I graduated from the university and got commissioned into the Army, I was going to receive orders to god knows where and I would more than likely loose communication with Julia. It was at that point that Julia turned to me and smiled. That smile sealed my fate. I knew she was going to be an important part of my life and a guide to my future.

We had a nice lunch. As John had previously informed us there was a multitude of men dressed in tailored suits that were obviously lawyers, legislators, and local professionals. When we finished lunch and after we had a few drinks, John suggested that we go in different directions for a few hours and explore the downtown sections of Raleigh. In other words, John wanted to spend some time alone with Lauren. Julia took me by my arm and said that there was a nice little park where we could transcend with nature. John said that we could meet back at the car in three hours as they walked away and down the street.

Julia commented, “I’m glad we can have some time together alone. I have a multitude of questions I want to explore with you.”

I didn’t respond, but just followed her lead down the street. We walked about three city blocks and turned right onto Park Street. It was a proper name for the street since the green of the park laid out before us. In the center of the park, there was a small lake. A man and a young boy were feeding ducks with bread crumbs. We walked on around the lake and located a spot that was away from the duck noises made by the birds engaged in eating. We sat down on a bench and Julia rested her head on my shoulder. The breeze coming off the lake added to the chill in the air. It was above freezing, but since it was a cloudy day, the wind chill had the temperature feel like it was below 32 degrees. I put my arm around Julia and moved her as close to my body as possible to share my body heat.

“This is very nice,” Julia said.

After several moments of silence, I decided to ask her a personal question. I got up my nerve and asked, “We’ve only known each other for less than twenty-four hours, but I’m having special feelings for you.” I took a pause before I continued. “I think your feelings for me are similar.” I took another pause and said, “Where would you like this thing we are exploring to go?” I quietly inquired.

Without moving her head from my shoulder she responded. “I’m twenty-one years old and in all that time, I never had romantic feelings with anyone as I’m now having for you. I don’t know if it’s just infatuation or it’s moving toward something else, but I would like to continue to see you and let nature take its course.”

I was having those thoughts as well, but I didn’t know if I should confess everything that I was feeling. She raised her head and put her lips close to mine. My lips touched hers and for me, this was another first. As our lips remained together, she opened her lips and invited my tongue to enter her oral cavity. Everything was happening very fast and I knew this could result in a commitment. In another day, I was going to be back at the university to prepare for my semester exams. I will still have another semester to go before I graduate. That will give me time to think about a romantic relationship. I moved back and said, “I’m going back to the university day after tomorrow and you’ll be going back to school as well. We can communicate by mail and plan to see one another over the Christmas holidays. Does that sound like a plan?”

As she looked into my eyes, I knew that she had me hook, line and sinker. She countered with “Yes, I think we have a plan. I’m glad that we met. You’re exactly what I needed in my life at this time.”

We sat quietly for a few minutes and then I said, “I don’t know about you, but I’m getting cold sitting here. Let’s continue our walk around the lake and find some place to step into and have a drink to warm up,”

We stood and continued our walk. I put my arm around her and she placed her body close to me. After walking another half mile, we walked out of the park and back in the direction we originally came. As we passed a side street, we noticed a tavern about halfway down that street. We walked down to the tavern and entered. Inside, there was a bar to the left and tables and chairs to the right. There were two other couples occupying the other tables. After we were seated, a waiter took our order. Within a few minutes, we had our Irish coffees. We sat there looking at each other across the steam streaming from the beverages. She put her hand on the table and moved it in my direction. Our hands touched. The shock of her warmth radiated through my entire body. I knew at that moment this was something more than a mere infatuation. Somehow, I knew she was feeling something similar.

After an hour and two Irish coffees, we left the tavern. We walked slowly back to John’s car that was now parked in front of the restaurant. As we got close to the car, I could make out two persons sitting in the front seat. The back door was open. Julia and I climbed in and greeted John and Lauren. “Let’s head back, John said, I’ve invited Lauren to stay for dinner. In the meantime, we can retire to the library and have drinks.”

We discussed on the way back what we had observed on our walks. John said he didn’t know about the Park and the Lake that Julia had introduced me to. He said that he was going to check it out one day.

When we arrived back at the house, John and Lauren headed to the library. Julia and I walked out to the barn. Julia wanted to show me her horse and some of the other animals. There was a staff that took care of all the elements of the working farm. There was an elderly man by the name of Jedd who has worked on the farm since he was twenty years old. He took special pride in taking care of Julia’s horse. The name of the horse was ‘Bullet.’ Julia attempted to have me take a short ride on the horse. But, I insisted that I had absolutely no training in riding. I emphatically declined her offer. Someone once told me that a horse instinctually knows if a person knows how to ride. I knew he would get the vibes from me as soon as I sat in the saddle.

Mr. Jedd spoke up and said, “You had better watch out young man. The last bow of Miss Julia that attempted to ride ‘Bullet’ rode off and into the sunset. Fifteen minutes later, the horse came back with an empty saddle. I often wondered what happened to him.”

“Don’t pay any attention to Jedd, he likes to make up stories and pass them onto visitors,” Julia said with a smile.

After another several minutes, we walked back to the house and joined John and Lauren in the library. They were sitting on the sofa and having a drink. “Did Julia give you the grand tour?” John inquired.

“Yes and she attempted to get me to ride her horse, ‘Bullet,” I retorted

“It’s obvious that you didn’t act on the invitation. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be standing in front of me now. That horse is everything Jedd says it is and more,” John said with a smile.

“Don’t believe him. He’s as gentle as one will find in an animal. Those stories are made up to entertain people,” Julia said.

John crossed to the bar and fixed Julia and me a drink. Julia and I sat down in separate chairs facing each other. Mrs. Major entered the room and inquired about our day. “Did you see the museum?” she inquired.

“Yes ma’am, it was truly inspiring,” I replied.

“I’m always fascinated how the curators of the museum put emphasis on the battles the Confederate Army won and the little attention they pay to the Union Forces,” Mrs. Major said.

“Well, we do have to remember that we are in the Deep South, and if it’s one thing these people have is a deep sense of pride and heritage. My ancestors fought on the side of the South during that unfortunate war, so, therefore, I can sympathize with what the museum is doing,” I said as I took a sip of my drink.

The maid came into the room and announced that dinner was being served.

Mrs. Major said, “Let’s retire to the dining room and have our dinner.”

We all filed into the dining room. Julia sat next to me. John and Lauren sat across from us. Mrs. Major sat at the head of the table and was conspicuously ignoring Lauren. She avoided looking in her direction and didn’t address any comments toward her all through the dinner. Mrs. Major spent most of the time directing numerous questions toward me. She was interested in what area of the Army I would be serving once I received my commission. I could see that Lauren was uncomfortable. In an attempt to stabilize the situation, I directed several mundane questions toward her. I couldn’t remember when I was so anxious to have dinner conclude.