The Imperial Warrior

Chapter 8- The Sound of Walking Away

"Would you like some more, dear?" Mrs. Mathews' silvery voice made Anya lookup. She had been trying to eat as slow as she could to buy herself time to think. A part of her still didn't completely comprehend what had happened and the rest just decided to shove those feelings deep down like she had handled everything else the past week. 

Denial was the easy part; the hard part was looking at the pity in Alex's parents' eyes. They had been nothing but kind to her but she couldn't help but resent that look. She wasn't a charity case; not when she lost her parents and not now that Kyle- well, whatever Kyle was. 

She knew she should be angry with Kyle; god knows, Alex was bubbling with rage. But she was just exhausted. A part of her felt like she was behind a glass panel and the whole world was just sliding by, right in front of her eyes. And there she was, paralyzed in her bubble of despair. The worst part was that she was just okay, with all of it. Once you surrender to the world, there is little you feel as it all comes crashing down. 

Alex nudged her with his elbow and she realized that she still hadn't answered. 

"Yes, please. This is delicious." She said pointing towards her plate, hoping that his mother couldn't see through her fraud excitement. It truly was delicious and perhaps the only thing keeping her tugged to reality.

Mrs. Mathews' cooked the most wonderful dishes and always made sure to call all of them over and not let them leave until they had eaten to the point of them getting Santa bellies. 

"Invite me more often, will you?" She told Alex. He looked up from his plate, wiped his mouth with the table napkin, and gave Anya a smile. 

"Always," Alex's English accent was just the right amount of thick, perfectly placed on the borderline of charming and annoying British accents. 

Anya knew that she had to get going soon but she didn't know the polite way to leave. The only friend she had ever stayed over with was Kyle and she had never thought about such stuff there. She hadn't needed to. A part of her was still there, wondering if Kyle had finally come home or was he wherever the hell he went to these days. 

They had all finished dinner by then and she was about to go help them clean up but Alex pulled her out to the living room. She knew what was coming but she couldn't get into another round of defending Kyle with him. Especially now that she herself didn't have anything left to defend him with. 

"Will you stay over, tonight?" Alex was looking at her hesitantly. She was surprised that Alex was still so nervous around her. 

Anya didn't really want to go to the Jones's house but she didn't want to impose on Alex either. He had already done so much for her. 

"Alex, you don't have to. I'm fine, really." 

"I know I don't have to but I want to. Plus, mum has been insisting to have you over since forever. I think she likes you more than me." He smiled at her sheepishly and her heart warmed. At least, she had done one thing right in her life.  

"Alright, but you are sure that it won't trouble?"

"Oh, if this is trouble, I'll gladly go to hell, miss."

Anya just chuckled at that but soon her face dropped. She had come to Alex's as soon as school got over and had nothing but her bag with her. She had to go home, to her own home this time. 

"What happened?" Alex noticed that her face had fallen. 

"All my stuff, some of it is at Kyle's and rest is- the rest is at home."

Alex realized what she was leading up to and was about to insist that his mother could probably lend her something to sleep in when she said, "Will you come with me?"

His immediate reaction was to say yes, but he didn't even know where she was asking to go to. A part of him was scared that she would say to meet Kyle because the next time he saw that bastard, Anya, or no, he was going to hit him. Hard. He was actually looking forward to doing just that but he didn't want to add to Anya's worry tonight. He had wisely decided to never bring up his name to her so he kept quiet and signaled her to continue.

"I need to go home. To get some of my things...  I don't have anything with me and I don't really want to go to Kyle's tonight." She added quietly and hoped that Alex understood. She hadn't been to her house since that evening and now she needed him with her. She knew that she was being weak and should just face her demons on her own but she felt that if she went back there alone, she would crumble whatever was left of her charade. 

"Of course, I'll come with you." He would follow her to the ends of Tartarus if she asked.

Anya was avoiding his gaze the entire time but looked at him then and relief flushed through her. She put his arms around him and whispered "Thank You" in his years. Alex just held her tighter in response. 

"I'll just tell mum and come."

She nodded and let him go back into the kitchen. She thought about the last time she had been home; it was just after school and she had been inside only for a minute to get her laptop and head over to Kyle's. Somehow, that moment seemed like yesterday and like a lifetime ago at the same time. 

Anya was sitting on the staircase when Alex came back, car keys in one hand and his jacket in another. He handed the jacket to her, "It's cold out there." She wasn't really feeling cold but she put it on anyway. It reached her thighs and she had to roll up the sleeves but it made her feel a little better. Alex's eyes immediately brightened up when he saw her in it and she calmed down considerably more. It was going to be fine, she reminded herself. 

He looked at her and smiled widely and put his hand on the small of her back as he guided her through the door. Then, as if he thought better of himself, removed his hand from her back. It lay there awkwardly by his side.

 They were quiet the entire drive over and Anya reached out to hold his hand but then she remembered the way he had dropped his hand from her back when they were leaving his house, almost as if he were repulsed by the movement. For a slight second, she thought that maybe Alex felt the same things Kyle had said about her but she shook that thought out of her head as they pulled over. 

Mr. Jones' car was parked in the driveway and Anya could see that the light in Kyle's window was on. She didn't want them to know that she had come to her house and considered turning back but she reminded herself that it was her house. She could come and go from there as she liked. She had already texted Mr. Jones that she was staying with Alex for the night so that she didn't have to worry about any questions from him in case she ran into him. 

She fished the key out of her bag and unlocked the door. Everything was exactly the same, though she could see traces of the police searching her house for their investigation. Her mother used to neatly stack the papers of their newspaper in the corner; which now lay in a disheveled pile by the door. Knee braces were lying around the room from her father's arthritis and even her copy of The Great Gatsby, which she had pulled out of the bookshelf for her assignment, lay there. All those things, remnants of a family never to return. Anya wondered when she would be able to sleep here again, the thought itself made her feel nauseated. Without her parents' laughter, it was just concrete, it wasn't her home. 

Alex stood by the door, looking at her with concern, "I could get anything- if you don't want to go up, I mean." 

She just shook her head; she would have loved to pass this on to someone else but she knew life didn't work that way. She would have to face this sooner or later, and she'd rather it be sooner. She took the stairs up to her room and found her travel bag. It was big enough to fit in all her stuff and some more. 

Anya was packing blindly, putting in the essentials: clothes, books and some toiletries. She figured that she wasn't coming back anytime soon and having extra books handy never did any harm. In fact, she had been saving one from her favorite author knowing that she would need that comfort for a rainy day. And right then, it was a damn blizzard. 

She paused in front of her parent's bedroom door on the way down. Her hand was on the doorknob before she knew it. A part of her didn't want to step in but the rest of her was dying to feel their warmth again. She had just stepped in when she heard a crash from below. Not trusting her footing, Anya stepped out of the room. 

Alex looked up at the same time and shrugged to show that he didn't know where the sound had come from either. 

"You okay?" He asked gesturing towards the bag in her hand. She just nodded her head in reply. 

The truth was that she wasn't okay at all. She needed to get out of this place; it was making her feel claustrophobic. The walls seemed to be closing in on her and she thought that even the clocks were ticking louder, snickering at her. Kyle's words hung at the back of her mind, making her judge her every move. 

"Anya?"

His voice was soft, a tone that he usually reserved only for her. She had realized that a couple of weeks ago and had never felt more honored in her life. The fact that he still used it had to mean that he didn't think the way Kyle did about her, at least that's what she told herself. 

She wanted to reach out to him, hold his hand and kiss him against the wall until the entire world melted around his lips. They had only kissed once before and half of her still thought that it had been out of pity. The other half though, wanted nothing more than to be back in that bubble with him, so much so that she had to remind herself of her dead parents to keep that feeling down. 

"Alex, I have to ask you something and I need you to be honest about this." The words came out of her mouth before she could think about them. 

"What Kyle said yesterday," she paused and tried to judge Alex's reaction but his face remained empty. So, she continued, "You don't think the same way, do you?"

Alex just blinked and now Anya started worrying. Maybe he did feel the same way and this was his way of showing that but before she could accept that she rambled on, "Because if you do, just tell me, please. I don't think I can- if you—"

Her voice started cracking and it took everything from her to hold her tears from falling. There was a time she prided herself over not crying but since the last week, all she had done was cry. 

"Are you done?"

She was ready to let him go. She would give him an out, and if he knew what was good for him, he would take it. She couldn't dump all her baggage on him. Even if it was too heavy for her to carry alone, she would. She could be Atlas, except in her story; there would be no one to tell her that she could have just shrugged. 

Alex came and sat beside her, "Well, you better be done because it's taking all of me to not touch you right now."

"What?" Her voice was still soft, perhaps too soft but he heard her; like he always would. 

"Anya, whatever nonsense Kyle garbled yesterday, it is absolute rubbish. You have to know that. I can't believe that it has been in your mind since then. Kyle is a piece-of-s**t-asshole—" Alex took a deep breath to stop that chain of thought. Then, he continued, "Let's not bring up Kyle for now, alright." He didn't wait for her answer that, "Anyway, you aren't what Kyle said, Anya. Not even close. How could you even think that? How could you think I ever thought about you like that? You are beautiful and strong and brave and I have no idea how you have so much strength to be okay even after everything that has happened. If I were in your place, I'd be a ball on the floor."

He reached out for her hand but pulled himself back once again, "You are the strongest person I know. Hell, the strongest person ever. Period. And honestly, Anya, I'm hurt that even for a second, you'd think that I would think about you that way. In any way in which I'm not so terribly in love with you." 

Anya didn't know what to say to him anymore. She was the one who had asked him to talk but now that he had, she had no words for him.

"Then why don't you?" 

"Why don't I what?" 

"Touch me." It wasn't a question anymore but a demand. Alex heard the hoarseness in her voice as she said those words. He moved in closer to her but still didn't take her hand. 

"I didn't want to take advantage of you, Anya. The last time- you were grieving, I know you still are- I didn't want you to think—" 

Anya wanted to punch the boy in front of her almost as much as she wanted to kiss him. But instead, she got up, stood right in front of him, and brought her face so close to his that all Alex would have to do is nudge forward and their lips would meet. His eyes showed that he knew that too. Alex gulped. 

"I love you, Alexander Mathews."

Anya whispered in his mouth just as their lips crashed. She didn't need to say the rest. Her body did the job for her and his followed suit. They didn't need words to guide them anymore. She knew she still had to yell at him for thinking about their first kiss like that but that wasn't important anymore. She locked her hands against his neck and kissed him. It wasn't anything like the first time. 

This kiss was a demand in itself, a command for more. The whole world melted by and this time she let it. She needed him and he didn't hold himself back anymore. She could see that it had taken all his willpower to step back every day because he was just as desperate for her. 

He pulled her close so that she was sitting on his lap now. She would have thought that she might not know what to do but her instincts drove her. Every time she moved in; his body responded. Her desire for him was raw and his passion in reply just made her want more. She knew that he was letting her lead the way, so she didn't hesitate.

Her hands went to his hair and their bodies locked against each other. She heard a low guttural sound escape from his lips and she opened her eyes. His eyes were closed too and some of his hair was stuck to his forehead. She was about to push them away when out of the corner of her eyes, she saw Kyle. 

❄❄❄

Surprisingly, Derek picked up the phone on the first ring. Kyle hadn't pegged him for a guy who answered his phone so quickly unless to threaten someone but then again, that might be the case with him after all. 

"Kyle?" Derek's voice was sharp in his years. 

"Why aren't you asleep?" He knew it was a stupid question to ask when he was the one calling in the middle of the night but he wanted to know the answer. Had something happened? Or moreover, had he done something that Derek was up cleaning his mess even now. He could hear another voice in the background. It wasn't anyone he'd met before because he couldn't place that voice. 

"Kyle, where are you right now?"

"In the sss, making cotton candy with pink pig babies. Where would I be in the middle of the night, Derek?"

Apparently, Derek wasn't in the mood for his witty comments because he snapped in his ears, "Kyle, answer the questions exactly as I ask."

"I'm home, Derek. My room- to be exact."

The girl's voice had stopped and Kyle wondered if Derek had yelled at that girl too or if he was the only one Derek barked at. 

"Okay, Kyle. I need you to get out of there." Derek really wasn't in the mood for games because he had never heard him sound so severe before. Commanding, yes, but this time he almost sounded scared.

"What? Why? Anya isn't here."

"I don't care, get whatever stuff you need, I'm coming to pick you up."

"Derek, what happened?"

"Whatever you did at school today, Kyle, you shouldn't have been able to do that."

He didn't understand what exactly Derek was referring to, since he had screwed up the entire day but something in Derek's voice didn't let him ask that. Even as he was saying this he had begun to move around, looking for his things. He found his bag stashed under the bed but paused and asked, "Will I be coming back anytime soon?"

There was a shrinking feeling growing inside his gut and he realized why that was, "No. You won't be."

"Kyle, go in front of the mirror and tell me what you see."

Kyle walked over to his bathroom and removed his shirt. He knew what Derek was asking about and the second his shirt was off, he understood why he was leaving home for good.

"How many?"

"All of them, Derek." Kyle's heart started speeding up as he looked in the mirror. His entire chest was a web of jet-black veins. 

"Kyle, don't be scared. I'll come over as soon as I can." With that Derek cut the call. 

He knew that he didn't have a choice then. He had to leave. He couldn't be trusted around his family any longer. He had thought that if he would just push everyone away, he could have at least been able to stay home. If he could learn to control whatever happened in the curse, he would have gained his family back one day. But looking into the mirror, seeing what had become of him, he had to go. He didn't know where Derek would take him and what would happen with him after today but he had to get away from his father. He couldn't put him in risk just because he wanted to stay home.

He had packed everything he needed when he remembered something. He opened a book and fished through the pages until he found his mother's picture. It was the one thing he truly couldn't live without. Their house didn't have any pictures of her anymore and that was the only thing that let him know that she had even existed once. He put it in his bag, zipped the chain and walked to the window. He knew he couldn't take the front door as his father would have heard him and he couldn't risk that. 

He hoped that whatever power Derek had, he had at least some of that because it was a long drop down. He clutched the straps of his bag, looked up at the stars and jumped.

He landed with a thud but could easily get up. Luckily, he had landed on his feet and not on his side. He hoped that his father hadn't heard that sound or dismissed it for street noise and quickly walked to the other side of the street. He decided to wait there until Derek came only to see a car pulling up towards him.

Derek had to be waiting for him nearby for him to come so fast but Kyle didn't bother asking. Derek just nodded his head in acknowledgment upon seeing him and asked him to put his bag in the trunk of the car. On opening the door, Kyle saw that a raven-haired girl was sitting beside Derek, earphones in her ears. He figured it was the girl he had heard on the call but was sure asking Derek wouldn't do him any good. 

He didn't need to ask anything to Derek though because she turned around, removed one earphone, eyed him up and said, "So, you must be our Imperial Warrior."

"Khia!" Derek elbowed her before starting the car. 

"Oh, you haven't told him yet," The girl didn't seem concerned that she had told Kyle something he wasn't supposed to know but since it had the world Imperial in it, he decided, he'd rather not know until the time came.

Since the girl already seemed to know about him, he didn't bother with introductions and directly asked Derek, "Where are we going?"

"To the place where it all began."

Kyle sighed; obviously, he would get a cryptic answer from Derek. He didn't even know why he tried. Derek never told him anything. He was about the ask the girl, Khia- was what Derek had called her, hoping that he would have better luck there when she said, 

"Buckle up, Kyle. We have a long road ahead."