Not All Heroes Are Guiltless

Chapter 22

Chapter 22

We make our way through another valley and over a mountain. He referenced an ancient holy place that should still be untouched by time and the Hou Ndours. But he’s had to make several detours because Hou Ndours are centered in every port, and most ports have patrols and scouts outside each.

Three days ago, we hid from a band of riders whom I couldn’t distinguish between bandits or a group of mercenaries. I was able to overhear that I have a hefty bounty on my head. My disappearance is a mystery to the Hou Ndour, and they are looking for me dead or alive.

My mate only pulled me closer at the news, but I smiled because after the last few days of training and traveling. I know he’s doing everything he can to prepare me to be ready to strike back. I just know it’s not going to be anytime soon.

We reach a large oak in a meadow filled with beautiful flowers. I can’t help but admire how the sun peaks through the tree and makes the flowers glow almost like a shower has just gone by to give them a drink.

“I can’t go any further. I have nothing to ask them for, and I’d rather not offend a god if I don’t have to. I’ll make camp close by. I won’t go far. Just call out for me if you need me.” He says, nuzzling his nose and mouth into my neck and kissing the skin lightly.

“What do I do?” I say, pulling away from him to watch a breeze drift by and dance along the grasses of the meadow.

“I wouldn’t know. Communing with a god is different between the god and devoted. Holy ground usually makes it easier, but each god is different. Be yourself, and they will either bless you or not answer you.” He kisses my fingers.

I nod a quick understanding he doesn’t know how to proceed either and wave to him goodbye as I start across the threshold of the beautiful meadow. I tread carefully, unwilling to disturb any of the flowers. Close to the trunk of the tree is a root that is flat, almost like it was polished and sliced to be an altar. I sit cross-legged on it and admire the old tree.

I listen to the wind and watch the flowers sway in the breeze. The sun was high in the sky when I arrived, and I watched until the darkness filled the meadow. Nothing happened the entire day. I guess I don’t know what to expect. Redland really didn’t worship gods, and I know nothing of Lupine gods.

When the night is still and silent, I’ve gotten restless. I stand up and exit the meadow. I try to lean on my wolf ability to see in the dark forest, but I know I’m going to just hurt myself. I remember my mate told me to call out to him. But I don’t know his name, and I’m not going to yell ‘help’ like a calf.

‘We could howl.’ My internal voice teases. I’m instantly detesting myself for doing something so patronizing. Howling in human form sounds like a terrible plan. But since I have no other idea. I throw my head back and howl. I let the solid sound ring out, and it's almost euphoric and nostalgic.

Quickly, I hear a response from not one but multiple voices, and they are all back in the meadow. I rush back and stand in awe when I see seven large wolves all lounging underneath the oak tree and a woman with long silver hair and a dress that sparkles like the stars sitting amongst them.

I almost feel like I should be doing something like groveling or bringing her a gift because she’s so beautiful even though her face changes ever so softly moving back and forth from a youthful energetic appearance to a wrinkled wiser older appearance.

As I get closer to her, one of the giant brown wolves growls at me, “Oh be quiet, you! The ancient ways can be forgotten this time. She may have upset you in her ignorance, but the poor child is seeking us, and we can’t turn her away.”

I bow my head softly after she scolded the wolf “Thank you for answering me.”

“Honestly, I had hoped the dark child would come with you. But it seems he still will not listen to our call.” She says with a pout and crossing her arms over covering her bosom. “I am glad he brought you to us, though. My, my, my. Please, let me get a closer look at you.”

I moved closer so she was able to see me. “You have your father’s eyes, but everything else is surely your mother. Now, let’s see if I can explain the problem you are having. Your most cherished memories are all wrapped up and were woven nice and tight, but someone attacked you savagely and tried to rip those memories away. They battered at your spell and then did a spell of their own so you could never unlock them again. I’m afraid there is nothing we can do. I know you came in hopes of a blessing or a gift, but your bloodline would interrupt the balance of the world if we gave you another. As a white wolf, you could try to summon light swords.”

“I don’t even know how I transformed. I was overwhelmed with the ordeal. I’ve tried to reduplicate it, but I just don’t know how.” I say sadly.

She looks at me much like my aunt would when I was a child with her eyes warm and kind, “Child, no one has ever been attacked by a demon so aggressively and lived to talk about it. Now, your memories and connections may have been sacrificed, but you stood up against something as a child that Delia couldn’t even brave. I am certain you will regain them with time and healing. Dear child, you must be patient. You need more time to heal and mend now that you are not hindered. Your connections will realign, but they will never be flawless. But what is even more fascinating about you is how accepting you have been to the concept of the dark omen child. A task even your own father with his big heart had trouble seeing him for who he is.”

“I’m not sure if I am. He is so secretive. I don’t know if I truly can accept him as my mate. My wolf voice seems to not fear him and is able to follow him, but I doubt him. My wolf’s voice seems like an entirely different person than me.”

“Yes, some scars will hold no matter what. It’s heartbreaking to think you are fractured within, but now that you have her, you must protect that part of you also. It’s a miracle and a torment.” She says, clicking her tongue in her thoughts.

“If I mend the connection I have with my wolf, I will be able to use the gift of the light swords because I am a white wolf?” I ask her softly.

The wolves around us all huff, and the woman shush them. “Goodness, bless your young soul. That gift was given to all black and white fur clans. Don’t let the dark child fool you. You saw him summon swords when he fought the giant. You don’t have to have our permission to be able to summon them. You just need someone to train you in the talent. Nonetheless, I think your arrival is a subtle warning that his time to serve us is running out. Hopefully, he will be able to finish your training. That must be why he didn’t arrive with you. Because he thinks we are disappointed in him.”

I glance around at the wolves, still lounging about and then back to her, “Are you disappointed?”

“No. Because he is similar to you. He can’t be held responsible for how he came into the world, nor can he be held accountable for decisions made before understanding fully what the consequences could mean. Not all of us agreed with our treatment of him, but he never let our judgment change his attempts to live up to his promises. Now, he’s starting to worry about you, so you should probably go back.” She says with the warmth of a mother.

“Is there something you want from me?” I asked hurriedly, still confused with all the information she’d given me.

“Our attachments with this world have always been limited, even more now. Our kin had been able to handle all the threats without our intervention, and we allowed them to live their lives with the freedom to rule themselves. Now, there are so very few. The future of what’s left of the once great empire is yours.” She says with pout, and then she’s replaced with a fog, and the wolves are now all dense fog.