More than Distance

29

Eleven

Carla

He kissed me.

I knew it was only because of the show, because he had to do it, but it felt so real. So right. He could have given me a quick peck and then been done with it. But he’d lingered. He’d used his hands. His tongue. His entire body.

His kiss had felt like the start of something.

Okay, I needed to calm down. His kiss had felt real six years ago too. I’d already learned I couldn’t trust my instincts in these situations. He was just a really damn good kisser, that was all. I was too much of a romantic and always wanted to believe something was there, even if it wasn’t. Which was how I ended up with a boyfriend who’d cheated on me for a year right under my nose.

No matter how real it seemed, Ryan was just putting on a good show for the camera to keep up our couples act. The intense s****l attraction during the cake-eating was part of the same thing. It didn’t mean anything. I knew that, but I couldn’t stop myself from desperately wanting him to kiss me again anyway. I wished he’d say something to make me angry so I could extinguish that desire.

As I drove to Laughlin, all those thoughts tangled with the worry that we hadn’t been fast enough today. There were nine other teams and I had no idea how many were ahead of us or behind us. The thought of getting kicked off now, in the first episode, made me so anxious I thought I might throw up.

Luckily, I got us there without barfing. Laughlin was like a mini Las Vegas right on the Colorado River, with desert behind it and mountains in the distance. Our destination was one of the river-front casinos, and we parked and ran straight into the lobby. I was hit with a blast of cigarette smoke, flashing neon lights, and the ringing of slot machines, but I didn’t slow down.

Chuck Bannon stood with a camera crew near the casino floor and grinned at us when we approached. “Congratulations! You’re the fourth team to arrive, which means you’re moving on to the next challenge.”

“Yes!” I turned to Ryan and gave him a hug, overwhelmed with relief.

“Tomorrow you’ll set out from this location to the next destination,” Chuck continued. “Since you were fourth, you’ll have a fifteen minute delay.”

That wasn’t too bad. We could easily make that up with good planning and some luck. We might even win a future challenge.

We were swept off by a petite brunette crew member named Luisa to do quick interviews about what we thought of the first challenge. I talked about how exciting it was to be on the show after watching it for years. Ryan said little, but all he had to do was sit there and look handsome and everyone loved it.

I tried to imagine the show when it finally aired on TV in a few months, and how every time I was on screen there would be a caption on the bottom: Carla, 22, Los Angeles, Model. What would Ryan’s say? Billionaire CEO? Wealthy tech genius? Video game mogul? He was ratings gold and they would milk that however they could. I could already see how the show would spin him and our supposed romance. The young, handsome genius who’d clawed his way up from nothing, now finally reunited with his long lost love. Ah, if only that last part was true.

Once we were done, Luisa handed us two hotel room keys. “Feel free to enjoy anything in the hotel, but remember you’re not allowed to leave the premises at any time. Doing so will result in disqualification. Please arrive back here in the morning at 7 AM. Enjoy!”

We grabbed the keys and took the elevator up to our floor. I couldn’t wait to get to the room so we could unwind and have some time to ourselves off-camera. But we soon discovered there was a big problem with the room.

There was only one bed.

A large one, sure, but just one. Were we going to sleep in that bed together? Sharing a hotel room was bad enough, but I’d figured they would give us two beds at least.

But why would they? This season was supposed to be romantic, of course they’d get us only one bed. The show got the best ratings when there was s*x or fighting. If there was both, even better.

At least the room was a decent size and had a couch, plus a view of the river. It was too bad we weren’t allowed to leave the hotel, because I’d love to be able to explore this slice of Nevada. I’d never been to this city before.

Ryan dropped his bag on the floor and surveyed the room. “I’ll take the couch.”

I started to protest, but then stopped myself. Everyone said I was too nice, so even though my first reaction was to tell him that wasn’t necessary, I slammed my lips shut. The idea of sharing a bed with him was too much for me to handle. I wouldn’t be able to get any sleep, I’d just replay that kiss over and over a million times. Oh, who was I kidding? I was going to do that anyway. But it’d be even worse if he was in the bed next to me.

“Thanks.” I kicked off my shoes and flopped onto the bed. The second I hit its soft duvet, I let out a moan that was way too loud.

Ryan turned toward me. “Are you okay?”

“Sorry. Bedgasm.” “What?” He looked at me like I had lost my mind. “That’s what my friend Julie calls it. You know, that feeling of euphoric release when you finally climb into bed after a long day.” I kicked off my shoes. “I’ve been up since the crack of dawn and we’ve been driving for about eight hours. I never want to get out of this bed again.”