The Healing Souls

Farewell to Ashley

[Carmen]

Rock was distracted all weekend. Gemma came and got me so I could say goodbye to Ash. We didn’t go to the going away party because my mother or father might show up. According to Gemma, we were right.

I couldn’t even go to my friend’s going away party without them trying to see me. If they had just come to say goodbye and left, someone would have called me. After how my mother acted the last time I saw her, I wasn’t going to put myself in that position again.

Gemma drove me to the airport. We’d always talked about how much fun an airplane could be. Ash would be flying to Alaska and, in a couple of weeks, Gemma would be taking a plane to South Dakota.

Every three years, there was a national gathering and the regional gatherings were all canceled in preparation for it. It took place in Belle Fourche, South Dakota. For a week, hundreds or thousands of werewolves would come looking for their mates there. Most people left soon after finding their mates.

They would leave inns, hotels, and motels for ranked wolves to rent out, but nearby campgrounds would be swamped with other wolves. I always heard it was insane and I looked forward to going, but now that I had Rock, I didn’t think it was as interesting.

Maybe it was that I didn’t really know how well I would do with a bunch of horny wolves in the forest, but I would probably have ended up spending most of the time in my wolf form. It would have been safer.

We arrived at the airport and Gemma parked. She took my hand once we got out of the car and led me into the building. I could smell Ash and Roald as soon as we did. They were waiting for us.

“Carmen!” Ash cried out before wrapping me in the biggest hug she could manage.

I held her tightly. I hated that I was losing one of my best friends. When I found out this was Ash’s second chance, I understood how she felt. Losing your mate was hard and it made you love your second chance all the more.

It was a sad and a happy moment. Roald needed her, though. He was a Beta and his mate was important to his pack. I knew Ash would be the best Beta ever. She had Beth as a role model. I knew my sister-in-law wouldn’t let Ash go unprepared.

“I’m going to miss you,” she whispered.

“You are going home with your mate. You’ll be too busy to miss us for a while. Once you remember we’re here, you can text and call. You’re only an hour behind us in Alaska. It’s not as if you’re moving across the world. You can come visit sometime,” I told her.

Gemma wrapped her arms around both of us and hugged us. We opened up our arms and included her in the hug. I didn’t love either one more than the other. I would be just as sad if I lost Gemma, too.

Part of me hoped that she found her mate and he moved to the pack with her, or she found him living in the same area, but wasn’t a werewolf. That would be great. If her mate was a fae, then we could be together forever.

“We’re going to miss you, too,” Gemma whispered.

We held each other and let ourselves cry. We’d all promised never to let ourselves cry as my mother did. We were always careful about when we were tearful. This seemed like the sort of situation where we could be a little emotional.

When we pulled away, I had a glimpse of a future of happiness for Ashley. I wouldn’t tell her. They told me not to tell them the things I felt about their future. Ever since I’d seen the fae healer, I’d been feeling a little more than I had before. Things were clearer.

Maybe they’d become clear enough one day that I wouldn’t spout weird stuff like I did last night to Dennis. I hoped he would help the woman, though. She was so scared of something more than the dark. I didn’t want her to be alone.

“We’ll come up in the summer next year,” Roald told us. “My family is looking forward to meeting Ashley, but we would never stop her from coming home to visit.”

I put my hand out to his voice and he took it. His hand felt strong and warm. I smiled at him.

“Thank you for loving our friend. I hope to get to know you better over time. I’m sorry that I wasn’t around a lot while you were visiting the pack.”

“Don’t worry about it. I understand completely after speaking with your brother. What your parents did was terrible. They didn’t consider you, your feelings, or your future. All they cared about was someone who wouldn’t care that you were blind,” he said in an angry tone.

“It’s amazing that you wouldn’t have cared. It’s rare that a wolf wouldn’t have minded a mate who couldn’t see them. I’m so happy you found your mate, even if it wasn’t the person you were brought out to meet. Ash will be a wonderful Beta female. A lot better than I would have been,” I told him.

He laughed. “I did a lot of research before agreeing to come to meet you. I knew there were ways to make everything work for you. Gemma told us all about how well you were doing working for your mate. I have no doubt that you would have been good at the job of Beta’s mate, but I’m happy we don’t have to find out.”

I nodded with a laugh. “A pack and a construction company are two very different creatures. Ash has been working for the pack for years. I know she’ll be amazing.”

“She definitely will,” Roald replied, releasing my hand.

I felt a breeze from movement and smelled Ashley moving. She must have been hugging her mate. I was so happy for her. She deserved to find a mate like Roald.

When we’d said our last goodbye, Ashley and Roald headed off to wherever they needed to go to wait for their flight. I held on to Gemma and she held on to me. We were separating from a part of us that we never thought we’d lose.

Ashley was the ‘mom friend’ and we counted on her to be there to remind us to be good. Gemma and I could get up to some silly things, but I was mated now, so I would behave better.

Gemma led me back to the car. We went to a sandwich shop and ordered four sandwich meals with chips and drinks. Once we had them, we went to our favorite spot in the nearby nature park.

We laid out our blanket and set out our food. We sat down and ate without talking for a while. It was hard to talk when Ash wasn’t there. At least for a bit. Gemma didn’t take more than one sandwich's worth of time to start talking.

“You both have mates. What if I never find mine?” she asked.

“Don’t say that. You’re going to find a mate, Gem. He’s going to be perfect for you,” I promised.

“Except that, I’m going to have to teach him to love.”

“Don’t pay attention to the stuff I said. I told you that. It doesn’t always mean the same thing,” I told her.

“I want it like that. It would be too easy if he fell in love with me right away, right? It’s one of the reasons I like your love story. Rock’s not what I imagined, but I think part of the reason he loves you so much was because he got a taste of what life was like with you, then he had to spend a week without you.”

“You think he missed me so much that he loves me more than he would have if I had just told him that night?”

She nodded. “Yep. He would have been happy, but doubtful. When he found out the truth, he wouldn’t have been as grateful for the blessing as he should be.”

I laughed. “If you think a blind mate who is smaller and weaker is a blessing, then I don’t know what to say. I’m a lot of trouble and I’ve caused more drama in Rock’s life than anyone else in over fifty years.”

“Forrest said Rock was weaker and smaller. I’m sure that caused a lot of drama for him. I watched him with you. Rock doesn’t see you as a burden and you know that. You’re what he wanted, someone who couldn’t overpower him in bed and who needed him, but not too much, outside of bed. Forrest told me how trolls are in bed.” She chuckled.

My face heated up and I focused on my sandwich. That made Gemma start laughing even harder. It must have been one of the times they got quiet when I came back from the bathroom.

“So he does that stuff to you? And you’re seriously cool with it?” Gemma asked.

“You’ll understand when you find your mate. They bring out sides of you that you didn’t realize were there. I told you and Ash that he was rough with me, but not the other stuff. It’s so embarrassing to talk about.”

“You don’t have to tell me everything until you’re comfortable; just tell me, does he hurt you?”

I didn’t know how to answer her question. Sometimes he did hurt me, but not in a permanent way and not in a way that made me feel bad. Rock cared about me a lot, but to tell her some of the things we did when we were alone wouldn’t make it seem like that.

“Not really. Sometimes it hurts, but I can tell him to stop if I can’t handle it. Rock always stops when I tell him to. Forrest is right if he told you trolls are dominant and male trolls tend to dominate their mates. Rock loves me and treats me tenderly, but he also grips my neck sometimes or pulls my hair. Sometimes he hits harder when he spanks me. But he always takes care of me and apologizes if I feel bad when we’re done,” I explained.

“I don’t like that, but it sounds like you do,” she said.

Without meaning to, I blushed again and nodded. I really did like it. Rock never hit me out of anger and everything he did was planned. Afterward, he took care of me and made sure I wasn’t really hurt.

“It’s not something I could really explain….”

“It’s BDЅM. A lot of people do it. Trolls do it as a part of their culture. Forrest said they can’t feel everything we can, so this is something they do to feel more. It’s just how they all are.”

I knew what she was saying was right. Rock told me how he was nicer to me than most of the troll women had been to him. He was careful with me because he didn’t think I could take as much, but he was starting to get comfortable with me.

That was good. I wanted him to be relaxed with me. I wanted him to make me his in a way that felt good to both of us. I may not have realized what I really wanted, but it felt good and right.

Rock never did anything I didn’t like. He could read me and pulled back when he needed to.

“Make sure no one back home finds out. If my parents ever find out, I don’t know what they might do. It’s not their business and they’ll blow it out of proportion,” I whispered.

“I would never tell anyone anything like that. As long as it’s consensual, I don’t have any reason to say anything about it. If I did say something to someone, it would be to Trent or Lily. They’re the only ones who have any reason to know anything about your relationship,” Gemma told me.

I nodded to her. It was either the Alpha couple or the Gamma couple who were consulted when people thought something was wrong in a relationship. I was pretty sure they were all pretty tired of hearing about everything my parents thought was wrong with mine.

We finished our lunch and cleaned up before heading back to the car. It was nice to have some things stay the same. Our favorite lunch spot was a little emptier without Ashley, but maybe we could take Forrest some time. I’d talk to Gemma about it after the freshness of losing Ash wore off.