For My Adonis

Chapter 1: The Flames of Injustice

What is this incessant loneliness? Never yielding.

The ever-burning need and desire to be loved, but the inability to love oneself. The inability to love at all.

Sad. I'm so sad, just standing here watching as my mother pleads her innocence. "I ne'er did it. I dun ne'er did it." The cries of the uneducated woman who had broken herself to give me an education were feint and unheard by the vindictive crowd.

She had killed those twenty-five people. But they deserved it to some extent. Every single one of them. Murderers, liars, and thieves.

Mother didn't deserve to be burned like a witch. Tied up like a dog to that stake, her clothes torn, her decency barely covered. My heart throbbed at the shameful site, but I refused to feel. It will only hurt if I let it. So I can't let the pain rush in.

What would I do? What could I do?

The answer was nothing.

Nothing at all.

I could barely protect myself, let alone save my mother. What would these people do if they knew someone was on her side? If they knew I was her daughter.

They'd burn me too.

I-I don't want to be burned.

A burly man, the local butcher, came to light the first flame. Mother had killed his firstborn son, but his son had been known for taking women against their will occasionally.

Mother had done the right thing. That man had no constraints, old or young, he'd have them all. I feel disgusted and repel his visage from my mind.

Of course, the people would crucify their savior. They always do. I turned my back on her and walked away, as she cried out. Her voice was dry and hoarse and sharp.

This was something no true daughter should do. I should watch until the end. I should collect her ashes when the commotion was over, and the people would have left to finally go rest before dawn.

Yet, I couldn't.

Let the wind carry her ashes.

The journey home was long and heavy. The path through the forest to the mountains was a path I had always traveled before, and yet something was different. I could feel it, something was wrong.

"Nuria." I turned towards the familiar voice. My childhood best friend. I felt something good well up in me when I saw his precious face lightened by the soft moonlight.

But even seeing him like this, wasn't enough to take the heaviness off my chest.

"Vita? Are you on watch duty tonight?" I walked closer to him, hoping he'd hold out his arms to hold me. "Mother-"

"Leave. You need to leave tonight." His tone was cold, unkind. Not like him.

"What's wrong? Did something happen with the Brotherhood? Did anyone get hu-"

"Do not," He looked away as though in pain, "Do not speak of us again! You are hereby, banished from the Brotherhood Seht. You no longer have a place in this town or the next five neighboring towns. It's so like you, worrying about us when you have yourself to think about."

He handed me the letter. The cursed letter I had seen being handed to other banished members of the Company of Assassins. The hidden peacekeepers my mother had been employed by. Under whose very name she had died.

She had died keeping it a secret. Of course, she did, she was so very well trained, since the young age of seventeen, they had trained her. When I had only been one-year old.

And here I am at seventeen, repeating my mother's life by being kicked out of the only home I know. My home is in the mountains.

When I didn't take the letter from his hand, he let it fall to the dirt ground and began walking away.

"Vi-" I sobbed. We weren't supposed to show emotion, that's how the Brotherhood worked, yet here I was about to break. "Please, please let the Grand Master reconsider. I- You know I have nowhere else to go. Five towns away? I don't know anyone. I don't even know anyone in this town-"

From the distance, he held up his pale hand to cut me off. When I stopped talking I hadn't even realized how loudly I had been crying into the night.

He took off his hooded robe and threw it towards me. I had even forgotten, I was wearing my smallest dress. It was torn up and old, I wore it almost every day. It definitely wouldn't have helped me through the night out in this cold.

It most certainly wouldn't help me on a trip to someplace five towns away.

The crunching leaves under his heavy footsteps let me know that he was leaving again. As I watched him walk away, my only friend throughout these lonely years, I fought back the tears again.

I picked myself up and took the discarded cloak on the ground. I dusted it up and shivered as a stray wind passed over me. As soon as I put it on, the cold almost immediately went away.

But I could still feel it through the torn tights under my undergarment.

I rolled back my shoulders and began my journey West. I didn't want to face the rising sun as it would indeed be rising soon. And if, at some point of the day, I was facing the sun, I would have to stop somewhere and rest.

My body complained with each step I took, stating we hadn't gotten enough sleep, but I ignored it and kept looking forward. I couldn't look back, there was nothing here for me anymore. Absolutely nothing left.

"Today's the day, let's celebrate. A special time, we just can't wait. Another year of joy and cheer, It's myYy birthday." I began to sing the traditional birthday song of our town.

I'm turning eighteen today. I guess I'm a woman now.

"Happy birthday, oh so true. This song is just for you. May your dreams take flight, And your heart shine so bright.

With every candle that you blow, May your wishes start to grow. A year of love, laughter, and fun, A journey under the shining sun."

My mother was only thirty-four when she died.

"Happy birthday, oh so true, This song is just for you. May your dreams take flight, And your heart shine bright."

She was only sixteen when the butcher's son had, had his way. She was his first victim. She blamed herself from time to time. If she could have reported it, maybe there wouldn't have been other victims.

"Friends and family gather 'round, To lift you up when you're feeling down. A celebration of who you are, Guided by a wishing star."

I paused for a moment. A stray tear I had no control over came down my face. I quickly wiped it away and kept walking.

This was a happy day. I'd make it a happy day if it was the last thing I'd do.

"Happy birthday, oh so true, This song is just for you. May your dreams take flight, And your heart shine bright.

So here's to you, with love and cheer, May this day be truly dear. Happy birthday, once again, May joy and happiness never end."

I gave a little cheer and clapped my blistered hands as softly as I could as to not irritate the little wounds. My last job had been to help the woodmen with their logs. I had no gloves, I couldn't afford them.

All my money was going towards saving for my final year of school. Now I wouldn't get to go. I patted the place where I kept all my savings. Under my left breast, I smiled slightly at how it was always there.

It certainly wasn't enough to start a new life, but it would get five towns away. Yes, it would get me very far away.

The brotherhood had named me Vixorel Vira. I hated that name. My mother told me she had given me the name of Nuria. I held it precious to my heart, literally.

I pulled out the locket with my name and baby's picture on the right side. On the left was a picture of my mother when she was young, and her name was Emberelle.

I suppose my new name will be Nuria Ember.

As I held the locket close to my heart, I felt a surge of determination wash over me.

I knew deep within me that I had to keep moving forward, no matter how uncertain the path ahead may be.

As the sun began to rise on the horizon, casting its warm glow upon the land, I found myself standing at the edge of a small village.

The locals eyed me cautiously, their curiosity mingled with suspicion. I could sense their judgment and knew that I was an outsider, an unfamiliar face in their midst.

But this village would not be my final destination.