The Alpha's Lost Luna

7

Liz

I couldn't breathe. My lungs burned with a fire that I couldn't extinguish. I dragged in air that felt like it would never be enough. My heart slammed violently against my ribs like it was trying to break free, and something thick — like a gag — lodged in my throat. I pressed my back against the door, nails scraping against the wood as I fought for control. It wasn't working.

A sharp inhale... and another. It still wasn't enough. My fingers tangled in my hair, tugging hard at the roots, grounding myself in something... anything that felt real. This couldn't be happening. It couldn't!

My legs gave out beneath me, and I sank to the floor, curling in on myself as I dragged my knees to my chest. Everything I had hoped for... Gone. Shattered in less than thirty seconds. The fragile, stupid dream I had clung to — of a mate who would love me, who would take me away from this place, who would see me — had been ripped out from under me before it even had the chance to exist.

My wolf stirred uneasily beneath my skin. She was conflicted. I could feel her. She wanted him. The bond pulsed, alive and insistent, curling tight around my ribs. It whispered mine in a way that made my chest ache. But she was tired. So f*****g tired. Tired of the way we were treated. Tired of surviving instead of living. Tired of being nothing. She wanted love and she wanted safety. She wanted the kind of bond the stories promised. Where mates were everything to each other.

I swallowed hard, shaking my head. I wanted that too. But I wanted more than just a bond. I wanted to be loved without conditions. Without expectations. Without having to prove that I was worth something. Rowan... a bitter and hollow laugh bubbled up in my chest. Rowan would never love me. No one here ever had. Not really. This pack had made that clear my entire life. The truth settled heavy in my chest. It was suffocating.

I needed to leave. The thought came suddenly, but once it did, it rooted itself deep in my soul. I couldn't stay here. I couldn't stay knowing he was mine but would never choose me. I wouldn't survive it. Seeing him with other women. Watching him give them everything I had spent my entire life begging for. Attention, affection, love... while I was left with scraps. I was so f*****g tired of scraps.

I surged to my feet, the decision locking into place before I could second guess it. My hands shook as I dropped to my knees beside the bed, reaching underneath for the bag I had hidden weeks ago. An old laundry sack. It had been discarded, forgotten, like me... I had sewn straps into it myself, turning it into something useable. Something mine.

I yanked it free and began stuffing it with what little I had. Clothes, necessities, anything I could carry without weighing myself down. I froze when my fingers brushed against the photo. My breath hitched. Gloria.

Tears burned instantly, blurring my vision as I lifted it carefully in my trembling hands. She was smiling in the picture. It was bright and warm and so full of life as we stood on the beach. The wind had tugged strings of her graying hair loose, and her laugh had been so loud, so free, when she begged someone to take the photo. I had been... thirteen? Maybe fourteen. Young enough to still believe things could get better. I know better now.

My throat tightened painfully. She had been the only one. The only one who ever loved me. She gave me her last name. Held me when I cried. Stayed with me through my first shift, through every scrape and every bruise. She had made this place feel survivable. And now she was gone, and I was leaving her behind.

A tear slipped free, landing softly against the surface of the photo. "I'm sorry..." I whispered as my voice broke.

The weight of it pressed in. I felt grief, guilt, and fear, but I forced myself to move. I had to. I couldn't afford to fall apart now. Not when this might be my only chance. I set the photo back on the small table beside my bed. My fingers lingered for just a second before I pulled away.

Think... I needed a plan. Emotion would get me killed. Slowly, and deliberately, I began unpacking the bag. I placed everything back where it belonged. Clothes, journal. I pulled the locket Gloria had given me from the bag and tucked it safely beneath my mattress. I would gather what I needed throughout the day. Food. Supplies. Information. A map. If I was going to leave, I needed to know where I was going.

My chest tightened against the thought. Despite everything... this was still my home. The land. The sea. The wind that carried the scent of salt and pine. I loved it. Even if it had never loved me back. "I can do this," I whispered, forcing steady breaths into my lungs. I had to.

I slipped into the hallway, careful and quiet. The pack was still at breakfast. Good. That gave me time.

______________________________________

The storage closet creaked softly as I pushed the door open, grabbing my cart and supplies before making my way toward Alpha Marcus's office. Every step felt heavier than the last. Every person I passed made my pulse spike. What I was about to do... it wasn't just wrong. It was dangerous. People had been punished for less. Severely. But I kept walking.

I hadn't seen Alpha Marcus or Luna Faye since breakfast, and I silently prayed to every god that would listen that they would stay gone just a little longer. Cade was nowhere in sight. Neither was Beta Richard. And Rowan? My chest tightened painfully. He hadn't followed me. Hadn't even tried.

I had known, the moment the bond snapped into place, that this wasn't what he wanted. But knowing didn't make it hurt less. If anything, it made it worse. I shook the thought away as I reached the office door. Focus. This was about survival now. I glanced down the hall, left and right, before turning the knob and slipping inside. Empty. Relief flooded through me, but it didn't last. I didn't have much time.

I moved quickly to the desk, scanning the surface. Stacks of paper. Reports. Numbers that I barely understood. But certain words stood out. Vampire attacks. Missing persons. Rising death tolls. My stomach twisted. Something bigger was happening in this world and none of us were privy to any information. That made us easy targets. It made us vulnerable. But none of this was what I needed.

"Come on..." I muttered under my breath, opening drawers one after the other. Pens. Folders. A pair of lacy panties. I wrinkled my nose. There were pictures of women that definitely weren't Luna Faye. I slammed the drawer shut, frustration mounting. "Where the hell?"

I tried the last drawer. Locked. The last drawer wouldn't budge. Of course! My gaze snapped to the bookshelf, defeat starting to wrack my bones. Maybe... I rushed over, scanning the titles quickly. My heart pounded harder with every second that ticked by.

"There you are," I breathed. I yanked the atlas free, flipping through the pages rapidly. Maps. Territories. Landmarks. It wasn't perfect but it was something. It would have to be enough.

I hurried back to my cart and the handle on the door clicked. My heart stopped. It didn't skip. It didn't slow. It stopped. Cold panic flooded my veins as I shoved the atlas beneath a stack of towels, my fingers fumbling as I forced myself to move. I slowed my movements. Control. I needed control. I needed to be normal. Invisible.

I quickly replaced the trash bags, grabbed a rag and spray cleaner. I quickly made myself appear to be busy cleaning as the door creaked open. Voices filled the room. Familiar ones. Dangerous ones. My throat tightened as I turned slightly, keeping my head down but making sure they stayed in my line of sight.

Alpha Marcus, Beta Richard, Cade, and Rowan. One had a look of disdain, one of open hatred, Cade's sharp curiosity, and Rowan... I felt it before I saw it. The bond pulsed hard. My breath caught as my eyes lifted for just a fraction of a second. His blue gaze was locked on me. His eyes were wide and unreadable. Intense, like he couldn't look away.

"What the f**k are you still doing in here? Leave. Now!" The alpha's voice snapped like a whip. My head dropped instantly, and I tried hard to hide the shudder in my body. I failed.

"Yes, sir. Sorry, sir. Your office is cleaned."

I moved quickly toward my card. My eyes flicked once, just once, to where the atlas was hidden. It was still there and hidden from sight. Good. I pushed the cart forward, forcing my legs not to shake as I headed for the door. Four sets of eyes tracked my every step. The tension was suffocating. I just had to make it out. Just a few more steps...

A hand clamped around my arm. The grip was like a vice and I yelped. Pain shot up my arm and shoulder as I froze. Alpha Marcus... My gaze dropped instantly, my submission was automatic.

"Make sure your chores are done on your own time," he growled. "Next time, I wont be so lenient."

My heart hammered violently as my arm throbbed in pain. "I... Yes, sir."

"Get the f**k out," he growled as he released me with a shove.

A low, dangerous growl rumbled through the room. Not from the alpha. My breath hitched. I didn't look back. I couldnt. I tore myself free the second his grip loosened and rushed out of the room. My heart beat roaring in my ears. I didn't stop. I didn't slow down. I didn't even breathe. Not until I turned the corner and the office disappeared from view. Only then did I press my hand to my chest, trying to steady the thud beneath it. The bond still pulsed. Stronger now. Louder. And no matter how far I ran, it followed.