We Belong Together

Chapter 20

Viet closed the car door, tilted his head, leaned against the side of the car, thinking with a very confused look. Then he took long strides to go out the door, across Binh Minh Street, through the Phi Lao forest, towards the beach. Phan is going to an acquaintance's house to return the key, he is alone. And something very strange that he couldn't explain keeping forcing him to go to the sea.

On the sand, traces of the fire remain, but far from the water because the tide had receded. He stood still for a long time, he remembered that it seemed like yesterday afternoon, when he was wandering somewhere far away. He found himself walking on a path full of phoenix flowers, red petals like fire falling on his shoulders and hair. Then he saw from afar, a girl carrying a peddler came, the girl looked very familiar. With a gait, with a face, with a smile that he can never forget. Hanh did not see him, she gracefully shouted, "Here is red rice cake" sounds so attractive.

But before he had time to call her back, even to ask for a bowl of cake full of celery and sage, he heard someone whisper his name. A very familiar, very familiar voice broke that sweet dream and brought him back to life. The voice kept haunting him from yesterday until now, it kept him tossing and turning, unable to sleep. Even when he tried to force himself to get some sleep, it persisted in that dreamy sleep. There was a time when he thought it was she who had saved him, but the reality he saw denied it. So even though he intended to tell Phan, he held back. He was afraid that Phan wouldn't believe him, he was afraid that he would worry, or that he would think he was delusional, or even insane. How to let Phan understand, even though Viet still he was right? You could be wrong about everything, but definitely not in this one. Hanh's voice.

Thinking of her, he suddenly smiled, very aimlessly.

She crouched beside the great Phi Lao, yesterday she followed him, since he and Phan helped each other back home. And this morning she snuck with him from the moment he left the house to go to the sea. He looks much thinner, and even older. His once square face became even more angular. He let his beard grow stubble without even shaving. Her hair is bouncy because she hastily stroked it with her hands, not as shiny and straight as usual. He wears a pair of classic blue jeans, a red T-shirt with a picture of a Rocks singer like he used to wear when the four of them went out to the middle of the Red River. Outside, he wears a brown leather jacket in the style that Phan often "directors" for him to wear. Those things gave him a rather romantic appearance, not the neat and tidy as she often thought of him. But the smile is still the same, unmistakable, still the smile that makes him look like a child so innocent.

She smiled, yesterday she was too alarmed to notice the changes. But this time, when she was only a short distance from him, he stood on the sand, and she hid in the Phi Lao forest. Then it all gave her a strong desire, a desire that made her struggle to resist. Desire to be near, to stand across from him, to see him smile, and to hear him speak.

***

He sobbed. Yesterday, when he was torn between life and death. Then it was her call (or some vague call that he thought was her call) that helped him make the right choice to not give up and return to life. But he was a bit regretful when he opened his eyes, because he couldn't see her anywhere? He even really regretted it, and blamed himself. Because if only he could choose again, maybe he would choose to meet her, even if only in an eternal dream.

***

She sobbed. Yesterday, when she thought she'd lost him forever, she realized how important he was to her. She just realized that when she remembers Life Hospital, about the short happy time in her life, he always an extremely solemn position. At first she thought that she missed him so much because she owed him so much. But yesterday afternoon, when she was willing to give up anything as long as she could save him, when she found herself agonizing in despair. A feeling she had never had before, even when she found out she was HIV positive that she knew that he had a much bigger position than that. She knew that she missed him so much for a completely different reason. But what's the use? She didn't have any other choice but to avoid him. As far as possible.

***

He sat down on the sand, reaching out to pick at the ashes that were still wet from the night dew. He picked up a handful of ashes and even sea sand and walked to the water's edge. Waves slithered onto the sand, l*****g his shoes. He waved his hand and threw it into the sea. The wind blows the sands - the ash is scattered, disappearing in the waves crashing ashore. Sighting, he turned back.

She quickly hid herself behind the tree, quickly ran to hide behind the wall of a water shop built on the sand near Phi Lao forest. She dared not look back, even though she knew this would be the last time she would see him. She wanted to capture for herself the last images of him, but she dared not. Tears kept falling silently.

She cried!!!

***

He suddenly froze, rubbing his eyes with his hand. I think he just saw her? But he quickly shook his head, scolding himself for being so obvious, that he was probably dreaming. Because she must be somewhere far away right now, she can't suddenly appear in front of him like that. How can life be so random?

"Why do you keep thinking about her so much"? He shouted out loud.

The car lurched away from the town in silence. Phan also did not dare to question him when he saw Viet leaving somewhere so that he had to wait for a long time. As for Viet, he was still at the wheel, only V. Horowitz was still carefree to show his talent. Much later, perhaps annoyed by the stuffiness and discomfort in the car or because of Horowitz's "gratuitousness". Phan opened the storage box to find another record. The box was filled with not music, but many, many letters. Letters with the same recipient's name, but the address space remains empty. Phan was silent. - Boy...

- Put it in now - Viet shouted, taking his hand off the wheel, planning to rob the letters - You are not allowed.

- Sorry, I didn't mean to - Phan put the letters back where they were, he closed the box. - But you... - I know what I'm doing, don't worry. - No, I just don't get it, why are you writing so much when you already know you can't send it?

- I call her every day. I text her number every day. But the response was always failure, because she removed the sim from her phone. I wrote her letters, even though I never sent them, because it was the only way for me to see that I still had a connection with her. Even though I know I'm crazy.

- Actually...

- You don't have to comfort me. Thank you. Anyway, I'm still happy that you're always by my side.

- The star left the mother! - Phan burst into swearing, he pondered and wondered for a long time - I think, actually, I guess, how should I say it? Yesterday afternoon, on the beach, I think I saw her.

There was a sudden squeal of a sharp brake that made the wheels grind into the roadway. The Lexus suddenly turned sideways, leaving long black burnt streaks on the road. The horizontal swing was so sudden that it threw Phan and hit his head on the glass door. Viet ignored Phan's grumbling, the incessant cursing from the cars on the road, also panicking because of his sudden brake. Lucky no accident happened. He yelled apologetically and stomped on the gas pedal. The car sped back towards the sea.

***

It is not difficult for both of them to find a marine rescue guy named Nam. It was even easier when Nam let them know that Doctor Hanh, who had just arrived not long ago, was the one who had helped Viet wake up yesterday. Everything was within the reach of both of them, but Viet and Phan still hugged each other and jumped for joy as if they were two children making Nam gasp in surprise. Not knowing how to explain it to Nam, the two hurriedly thanked him, hurriedly asked Hanh's whereabouts and then came to him.

A small, old house, surrounded by a dense bamboo fence like many other in the neighborhood. The most distinctive and noticeable point is probably the old Mango tree and the sketchy shop outside the gate. But welcoming them was not the person they were looking for, but just an old woman who looked very old and said she did not know who Hanh was.

***

After a while of begging, begging, and persuading, the old woman still insists on not telling both of them any news about Hanh, let alone asking to meet. Although Viet said that he had met her, had seen her on the beach. Someone even told him where she lived. But she still thinks that the two are too confused. She did not know, did not know, and had never seen anyone like him. And she didn't have time to sit here and deal with them forever. I told you, I don't know any doctor who speaks with a northern accent in this area. It was better for both of you to go home, or just sit there and have a drink, if you liked, but she wouldn't answer any more questions. Not a word, hope both of you understand.

It was late at night, the coastal town was silent in sleep, it rained again, and the wind was cold. Hanh is still sitting quietly focused by the window, her eyes are on the gate, she has been sitting there for a long time. The two men are still sat patiently in the cold night waiting for her. Why does Vietnam have to suffer like that? The two just met by chance, then became friends, that's all. He just had to do one simple thing, pretend he had never met her in his life, and forget about her. What a simple thing? But, she sobbed, but as she knew he wouldn't, neither could she. Nostalgia is like a deep chronic disease that has been dormant in the heart for a long time to emerge. If she didn't meet him on the beach today, if she didn't save him today. If God hadn't been so cruel to toy with both of them, she wouldn't have known that she missed him so much.

There was a time when she wished she could meet him, meet Phan, and even Thao. She wished she could go back to the happy old days, even just once. But right now, when he was out there, so close, she only needed to take a few steps to the yard. He will see her, he will run. Then she dared not. Before, she thought, if the two met, she just had to refuse to return to work for him, everyone would still be friends as usual, as long as it didn't affect his life and career. But since yesterday, since she knew he had a very important place in her, she decided not to see him anymore. Meet him for what? Let her hurt you? Let her get in his way? She made him work hard, made him miserable, affected his career. So you don't blame her? Yet he still came here looking for her? Why? Why Vietnam? She wanted to ask him, why did he have to go to such trouble to find her? But she couldn't.

- I'll go see him. The mother gently placed her hand on her shoulder, letting out a small sigh.

- I can't, I...

- They've come here for the third time in a day. They already know you're here. I can't run away forever.

- Mom, I...

- If I don't come out, they will probably sit there forever. I should have met him. He's a good person. You shouldn't...

- But if I meet him, it won't solve anything?

- You should at least talk to him once, tell him everything to ease his mind.

- I...

- Don't be stubborn, if you don't meet once to make it clear, the two of you will not be able to live comfortably. I leave.

***

Re-tie the laces of your sneakers for a little extra tightening to combat the cold of the night. Viet stood up as soon as he raised his head and saw her proposed. He happily turned to his friend, but Phan had already disappeared. I just saw Phan here, right? Why are you going anywhere so fast? But Viet did not have time to find out why, she stepped forward. She lost a lot of weight, her eyes were dark, maybe she had insomnia. She walked rather quickly, but still hesitated.

The rain had stopped falling for a long time, it was probably late at night. Everything was asleep, even the stars hid in their own quiet corner. Since there was no one to keep watch in the sky, the raindrops began to fall freely. Regardless, there seem to be two people who enjoy the sound of falling rain listening to the rhythm of the rain on the last night of winter.

Viet stood silently, still engrossed in the game of drawing pictures in the sand with the tip of his shoe. And Hanh is practicing the new game she learned from the children in the neighborhood. She put her hand out in the rain, pulled out all the young bamboo leaves from the bamboo fence next to the shop. She pinned the top to the stem, forming beautiful bamboo leaf bracelets. Both were still absorbed in their work despite the wind howling overhead. Perhaps feeling resentful because the cold I bring still doesn't mean anything to the two guys playing the game silently below. The wind howled again angrily, blowing into the restaurant, drenching the space with steam plus the horrible chill that made Viet shiver, his teeth chattering. Hanh paused her game, her eyes fixed on him sadly but then quickly focused on making her own bamboo leaf bracelets. When she had plucked all the young bamboo leaves within her reach, she discovered that the single bracelets were not beautiful at all. She then took them all off, meticulously attaching the bracelets little by little to a long bamboo chain. Viet also seemed to feel that the images he had just drawn were ugly, so he erased them all with his feet to start drawing new pictures.

Angered, the wind blew stronger and louder, pouring rainwater into the restaurant, causing Viet to loudly cough because of the cold. Hanh confusedly approached, gave him the thin blanket that she had been slinging over her shoulders until now, completely covering it over Viet's head to keep from the cold. Then she giggled when she saw Viet's funny appearance in a thin blanket wrapped around her like a Muslim girl wearing a headscarf with only her face exposed. The smile quickly displayed its special power, and the wall of embarrassment, awkwardness, and tension that separated the two of them instantly melted away. Even if only for a moment. Viet also smiled shyly, he looked at her, very considerate and affectionate.

- How are you these days?

- Good, I think. And you?

- Great, I guess. It's just that without you, the hospital is a bit miserable. Everyone misses you so much, - Viet laughed, then still smiled awkwardly like that, he hesitated for a long time - me too.

- I'm sorry.

- Um!

The stillness of the night was restored in an instant, as if the last disturbance had no effect on either of them. Because they quickly get back to their favorite jobs. Hanh's bamboo leaf chain has now been extended to another length, and Viet is starting a new game, perhaps he is trying to find out the texture of the sand in this area, because he keeps moving. shoe toe on sand. Only later, when her patience had reached its limit, she spoke up:

- Why?

- Why something? ' he asked again, even though he actually thought he was being too funny with the silly question he just asked.

- Why do you have to find me? She was very patient.

- Can I tell you a story?p>

She looked surprised to hear his answer, perhaps she was waiting for another answer. But then she said nothing, just lowered her face slightly, looking expectant.

- ...

- Why don't you tell? I've been waiting a long time.

- I have no idea where to start.

- ...

- ...p>

- Funny, huh? She broke the silence again.

- What do you say?

- No! Did I say anything?

He smiled quietly, he thought of many things to say to her. But then when he met her, he forgot all about it. You don't know where to start? And how? What are you talking to her about now? Say he misses her? Or talk about her mother for her peace of mind? Or tell her how Hoang Viet was kicked out of the industry because he was accused of demanding patient envelopes and cutting down on hospital consumables? He didn't know, she was standing in front of him, still with the same familiar appearance, but the ability to speak language was fighting becoming a luxury gift for him. She looked at him sympathetically. - How is Hanoi?

- Without you, the color is a bit down, but in general, it is still arrogant and boring.

- You're back to normal. - She laughed, trying to make the atmosphere more natural.

- Strange, I heard this saying yesterday, from Phan. Or something like that. Do you look like a different person now?

- Something like that. She laughed again, this time more natural.

- Let's go for a walk.

- Is it raining?

"It's not that big, and besides, I just got a good raincoat." He lifted the blanket over his head, gesturing for her to grab a corner. His gesture made her burst into laughter.

- The set is fine. Now is the time to think about the hot shower and the comfy bed. Do your best, dear friend.

Phan left the bushes, the rain made his shirt wet, shivering cold. He walked hastily towards the hotel, before turning himself into a giant ice cream. The mobile in his pocket vibrated every time, the bell signaled that he had a message, who texted me at 3am like this? he wondered.

- Where are you? I went to Hanoi this morning, I thought I would see you, but you didn't come home. It's so cold, I can't sleep, I miss your warm embrace. You want to come back. I miss you.

End

Without a word, silence was absolutely reputable even though they had the identity of every tree, shop, house, street lamp post during their long walk. Then when the dawn was about to break, it was time for them to stop "walking" on the beach. He pulled her hand and sat down on the sand, the sand was very fine. The sun stretched the shadows of the two of them onto the beach. He absently paints on the sand with shapes that are difficult for any artist to define. She was captivated by the ravishing beauty of the rising dawn. Finally, when the sun had risen above the sea, she stood up.

- I'm here. You go home too, your work is waiting.

- Don't! Panicked as if she were afraid she would disappear into nothingness, he quickly grabbed her hand. - Don't go.

She paused, looking at him intently. Her gaze confused him for a long time, still unable to find anything to say. He hesitated.

- I don't come back.

"I have to go." She tried to pull out his hand, walking quickly. "I have to come back. Remember to take care of your health.

She walked, quick steps, decided steps. She walked quickly, in a hurry before emotions could overcome reason to force her back. Her feet seemed to be carrying heavy lead, making her brace herself. Teeth clenched, chin spread out, tears rolling down my eyelids.

He stood up, he wanted to run after her, begging her not to go. He thought that joy, happiness and the meaning of his life were leaving him with every step she took. He shouted after her as she walked quite a distance on the beach, the screams bringing her to a halt.

- I love you!

The wind blew very gently, and the sun was gentle. Waves danced on the sand, she turned around. She looked at him, surprised, confused. What did you just say? She pursed her lips, lowered her head, and twisted her hands shyly because she didn't know where to put them. She was dimly aware of his feelings, but when he heard him say it out loud, it still gave her a real shock. She couldn't believe her ears anymore. But her feet still didn't stop, she still walked very fast on the sand. He ran after her, from behind, he hugged her, very tight. She tried to wriggle out of his arms but couldn't.

- You let go of me.

Viet hug her tightly as if afraid that if he let go, she would fly away. It wasn't until she mentioned her sentence for the third time that he embarrassedly apologized and released her, quickly turning to face her. She was turning away, hastily wiping the tears from her eyes. He took her hand, his gaze soft, but burning.

- I love you!

- You're crazy. I cant.

- Yes, I love you. Come back to me. Hospitals need you, patients need you. And I really need you.

- Viet - She burst into tears - Please, I can't.

- Why?

"Because," she sobbed, "because...

- I don't need to know why, just know that I love you. I just need you.

"I'm sorry," she jerked her hand away from his, though each sentence was a cold blade stabbing her heart. - I don't love you.

- I lied - Viet shouted - lied.

- I told the truth. - The teeth biting her lips trembled - I'm sorry. - You lied, look me in the eye. I'm lying. Why?

- I'm sorry - Hanh knelt down, she could only repeat her apology - I'm sorry.

- You don't accept that. I know you did it for me, - he bent down to lift her - but you're wrong, I don't need you to do anything for me, because I just need you. - Why? Why me?

Because I was born to belong to you, you were born to bring me happiness. Hanh ah! Because we belong together.

- There are so many other girls who ... - she was confused, couldn't find the right words - who were more ... than me. Please listen to me. Those are the people who can bring you happiness. I don't.

- No! No one can make me happy but you. Because the person I love is you. I just love you. No matter what anyone says, even if the sky falls tomorrow. I still want to scream to the whole world that I love you. Listen to me, I love you. What is the meaning of life without love? It was you who helped me figure that out. Listen to me, I don't care how much time God gives you? A day? One month? A year? You don't need to know. What's the point of living a hundred years if only living in loneliness and cold? I would rather live a day with you, love and happiness. I want every morning, I will wake you up with a kiss. Welcome you with a fragrant rose, and together we will decorate our house. I will help you cook, in return, you will help me clean the house. And every evening, we will talk together with Chopin. Do you know? He'll be mad at me if I let you out of his arms.

- Viet ah! I can't...

- I can. When one has love, nothing is impossible. We will build a happy family. And children too, if I can't have children, I will apply for adoption. I will raise them, I will be a good father, and you will be a great mother. - I'm sorry, - Hanh sobbed. - We can't.

- Okay. - Viet pulled out a syringe from his pocket, perhaps he had prepared it in advance. Hanh stepped back a bit, she knew there was no way he could harm her, but she guessed what he wanted to do? It was a crazy idea, but she would never let him have the same disease as her. He said, in a soft but extremely serious voice - I won't let you worry about me anymore. We will share joy, enjoy happiness, and bear all pain together. Together against this terrible disease. When you hurt, I will hold your hand, give you strength. When you cry, I will hold you in my arms, lean on my shoulder to cry. When you smile, I will join your joy, we will multiply it forever. Everything, everything, I want us to do together.

- You're crazy.

- No! I just love you. Let me be with you, or let me go with you, anywhere, to the end of life, okay?

She fell into his strong arms that were waiting open wide. No kisses, only tears. Happy tears. What's wrong, when they already belong together? People know they belong when two hearts beat together, when they find it impossible to live without that person, not just when they exchange kisses.

Someone said, if there is any place where earth and sky come together, it is in the sea. And love says, if there is a place where two souls merge into one, creating a power greater than all difficulties and challenges, it is in love.

Spring has begun to make its mark on the streets with green shoots on the eagle trees along the sidewalk. Hanoi is adorned with bright colors by the flower stalls of the flower shopkeeper whose smile makes others confused. Because I don't know what is more radiant and fresh? Smiles of florists or flowers? Sua flowers also began to turn, covering their branches with their characteristic young green foliage. Just waiting for March to come, the Sua flowers suddenly burst out white, falling on the sidewalk. The tiny white flowers flutter in the air like tropical snow, making visitors stop and stare. The flowers will then fall on the hair of the people sitting on the two Vespas running slowly on the road.

The spring of love has never returned so completely, after a cold and harsh winter.