Curse of the Moon Goddess

My Newest Mate

“Dude, why are you reading from that lousy old journal again? That thing looks like it’s falling apart!” my beta complains, taking in the crumbling paper on my desk.

As my memory began to fade of how my Aleina looked, I feared I may completely forget her. Forget why I put myself through this torture. I started a book several lifetimes ago to write everything I could, then hide it somewhere safe until my memories returned in my next life. Some of it was so faded I couldn’t read the words anymore. I hated this and I wanted it to end. But my wolf and I just couldn’t let her go.

“Surprised?” I asked jokingly.

My beta rolled his eyes at me before getting back to business.

“Alpha, Alpha Lukas from the Blood Fang pack just entered our territory. We should prepare for the run.”

“Ah,” was my only reply.

Alpha Lukas and I had a friendship destined longer than I would ever tell him. We had a common ancestor, my first father. I recognized him right away. We shared the same golden-brown eyes that were unique to our family bloodline. That was the one feature I was allowed to keep with each lifetime. The Moon Goddess said something about loving the color. My other features were based on genetics. With each lifetime the Moon Goddess always gifts me with parents with very fine features which I unavoidably inherit. I know she does this as a type of punishment because with good looks comes lots of good-looking women. Both human and werewolves alike flock to me like fleas to a carcass. In one lifetime I even tried making myself look hideous by giving myself a nasty scar. But it seemed to have the opposite effect. No matter what I do, there always seem to be women lining up while I’m trying to keep my mind focused on someone else. 

I will admit, during a couple lifetimes I’ve tried having other relationships while waiting for her to show up. But those always leave my wolf and I feeling sick to our stomachs with regret. 

I find myself waiting outside the Blue Moon Pack House as a gorgeous brand new black with red trimming Lykan HyperSport screamed to a stop in front of us. Lukas’ pack was the richest in the U.S. The guy was super great to hang out with and one of the most loyal people I’d ever met, but I hate how he flaunts his money around. It’s actually really annoying.

“Hey man! What’s up?” Lukas grins as he walks up to us.

“Good to see you man. How’re things with the pack?”

“Good. Things have been quiet lately. We had a minor incident with a rogue a few weeks ago, but they were peaceful, so we let it go. How’re things here?” Lukas replies.

I groan inwardly. Rogues have been everywhere these last few weeks. And not the friendly kind that want to pass through peacefully. The kind that are starting to group together and form a type of violent gang. That’s part of the reason I asked Lukas to come today. Maybe showing we are strong and have strong alliances would help. Plus, there were some humans out for a camping trip somewhere near here and I would hate for one of them to get caught in this mess.

“I think you know the answer to that,” was my only response.

Lukas nodded before turning to my beta, “How’re things with you Beta Ian?”

He shrugged, “Can’t complain. We really need to have a co-pack party soon. I’m dying without my mate!”

He made some dramatic sounds and gestures to emphasize his point. 

I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help smiling. Ian was anxious to find his mate. Probably because his younger brother mated a few months ago and has been rubbing it in how great it was. I really need to be a better Alpha and plan more events, but it’s kind of hard when I don’t want to find mine. I’m afraid this time I won’t be able to reject her.

The thought causes me to flinch. Each rejection becomes more and more difficult. The Moon Goddess is merciful to the mates I reject. She always sends them a second mate and minimizes the effect my rejection has on them. For me, I get a double dose of despair and hurt. I carry the pain the mate I reject would have to feel. It’s my eternal punishment. 

“Alright. Well, let’s get this party started then!” Ian announces, sensing my mind drifting.

I haven’t told him or anyone else for that fact about the curse. That was the agreement. If I tell a single soul or attempt to explain my actions, she dies. Not just temporarily, but permanently. Another way for the Moon Goddess to punish me. I think it is also to keep me from sending out a search party for her. Another thing the Moon Goddess does to me. She makes me Alpha each time. Why? Because she cannot deny I have Alpha blood. If I am born to an Omega family, I would just take over another pack. It is how my wolf and I are. I guess she doesn’t want to see me tearing apart all of her children searching for a pack with Aleina in it. Instead, she traps me to one pack; taunting me that I can’t go out to find her.

We all strip down, then transform into our wolf selves. As one, we race into the forest to run a perimeter sweep.

It felt amazing! One good thing to all of this was reconnecting with my wolf time after time again. Our coat was a dark red, almost black color. Each lifetime I’m referred to as the Blood Alpha since my coat looks like dried blood. I momentarily get a flash of Aleina’s wolf. Her’s was a mostly white wolf that shimmered with a silver blue whenever the light reflected on it. She was naturally a Luna. 

I shook my head to try and stay focused. If we were attacked because I was thinking of something I don’t have, I would never forgive myself.

I focused instead on listening. There was a soft breeze, causing the leaves and branches to rustle gently as they danced. I could hear a family of rabbits to our right running into their home. 

Mmmm. Now I’m a bit hungry.

I smiled a bit as I telepathically sent that message to the others in the group. There were some low growls of laughter in response. I loved this. It was the one joy I could count on in each lifetime. No matter how many packs I had, I loved being with each one. Obviously, there was always the pain of losing them at some point, but it didn’t keep me from caring for them each time.

Suddenly, I came to an abrupt stop. The most amazing scent was caught up in the breeze as it crossed my path.

Mate!

The word both sent shivers of delight and dread. I knew the other wolves could sense what had just happened as finding my mate meant I had found their Luna, so I didn’t bother explaining myself as I took off. I could hear their chuckles as I raced to the left.

The scent was so faint she had to be quite a ways away. I couldn’t resist going. My will power was weak and I couldn’t resist the smell. I was lonely and I didn’t want to feel alone anymore.

At last I broke through the trees. The scene before me caused a low growl to form in my throat and without a second thought, I prepared to lunge.