My Southern Lover

Chapter 6 - Belle

Later that day, when I came to get Leo from school, he refused to say a word to me, or to his teacher who wished him good bye.

That was unusual for my boy and it scared me more than any tantrum could ever have.

My Leo didn’t know how to hide his emotions. If he didn't like something, he'd complain about it in a particularly loud fashion and if he loved something, he'd make sure the entire street knew about it.

But now?

He just sat in the back of the car like a deflated balloon. Still, small and silent.

Which was ironic, seeing as how I'd just been called over by his teacher for him being "mean."

"I didn't know Leo could be like this," Ms. Richardson had said, her lips drawn back in a smile too tight to be honest. "He compared another student's hair to a mop and when I tols him to apologize, he wouldn't."

I'd blinked, surprised at her accusation. "Leo said that?"

"He's usually nice, so this was… surprising,” she said. “That's why I wanted to speak with you, actually.”

I shook my head slowly, even though my mind was already on three different wavelengths.

"Is something wrong at home?" she asked sweetly, smiling like one of those mothers who did too many parenting TED Talks.

"Yes," I blurted too quickly.

Her eyebrows knit together, but she didn't ask any other questions. SHe just gave me those faked, awkward grin people too uncomfortable to tell the truth save for others.

"Okay, well. If something comes up,” she’d said, clearing her desk of some papers. “Just feel free to come to me."

"Thank you, Ms. Dana,” I’d said, getting up. “ I'll talk to him."

And now, here we were. In the car. Me and my little angry son.

I glanced at him in the rearview mirror as I buckled his seatbelt. "Leo, baby, can you tell Mommy about your day?"

He didn’t say anything. He just turned around and buried his face in the window.

"I heard you were angry with someone in your class," I tried once more, speaking softly. "Do you want to tell me what happened in class today?"

He still didn’t answer me and his silence was becoming suffocating.

I let out a deep breath and parked the car in an empty free corner. I turned back to face my son completely. "You know you can always talk to me, don't you?"

Still nothing. I sighed and kept driving.

When we arrived home, the silence between us had already grown. I hated the tension brewing between us, but I had to make sure my boy had his space.

I parked in the parking lot and turned around to help him get off his seat, but he pushed my hand away.

"I got it," he grumbled, his tiny voice sounding angry as ever.

I blinked, shocked at his behaviour. He hardly ever pushed me away.

He leapt out after he’d managed to unbuckle himself, his little feet pattering onto the ground more forcefully than they needed to. Then he stomped, at least his idea of stomping, toward the apartment entrance and slammed the front door shut behind him.

Well, attempted to. It bounced a bit, but the message was definitely clear.

He didn’t want to speak with me at all.

I sat in the car for a long moment, allowing the heaviness of everything to settle over me like wet cement.

Leo was acting out and I didn’t know why. I had a feeling I knew the reason he was acting out, but I honestly hoped it had nothing to do with what I was suspecting.

I needed to be more conscious around my boy because it seemed he could feel the tremors in the foundation of the life I’d worked so hard to build.

I finally walked inside to find him curled up on the couch, his arms crossed, eyes fixed on the muted cartoon scene playing on the screen.

Selena looked over from the kitchen, holding a wooden spoon. "Hey, I got dinner going. What's up with my mini-CEO? He usually greets me with jazz hands and stained lips."

"He got into trouble today," I said, kicking off my shoes, and heading toward the kitchen. My eyes were still on him as I entered the kitchen completely.

Her eyebrows rose. "Leo? Our Leo?"

"Trust me,” I said, taking off my scarf. “I was surprised too. Apparently, he told a girl in his class that she had mop hair."

Selena stifled a laugh. "Okay, that's terrible. But also, maybe she did?"

"Selena."

She held up her hands. "Fine, fine. I'll be responsible."

I placed my bag on the table and headed to the couch. "Leo."

He didn’t turn around.

"Sweetheart, will you talk to Mommy?"

Nothing.

I got down on my knees beside him, putting myself in his line of sight. "Did something serious happen in school?"

Still nothing.

I grasped his hand, and this time he did not push it away. His fingers though, were cold.

"Leo, you know words hurt people, don't you?" I decided to just go straight for it.

"I know," he whispered.

"Why did you say it, then?"

His tiny jaw clenched.

"Leo…" I trailed off before he cut me off.

"She said I didn't have a daddy."

The words hit me like a blow to the gut.

"She said maybe my daddy didn't love me. That may be why he isn’t here." I could hear the quiver in his voice and it broke something in me.

"Oh, baby…"

I pulled him into my arms and squeezed him tight, holding him close to me. I could feel the tremble in his tiny shoulders. My boy didn't cry as he wasn't a crier. But the way he held me was more than what words could say.

"I wanted to say to her that I have a daddy," he mumbled into my shoulder. "But I don't even know who daddy is." I felt wetness on my shoulder.

I pinched my eyes closed, struggling not to sob in front of him.

"You have a daddy, baby" I whispered, trying my best to keep myself together.

"Then why isn't he here?"

An oppressive silence surrounded the room.

Selena sat in the kitchen, feeling the tension and kept quiet.

I pulled away, smoothed out Leo's golden curls from his forehead and looked him in the eye. "He's... complicated. But he loves you, baby. He does, even if he doesn't know it yet."

Leo scrunched up his face. "That's stupid."

A hearty laugh escaped my lips at his observation. "Yeah. Grown-ups are dumb sometimes."

He nodded against me, then froze.

"Are you mad at me?"

"No, baby," I said, placing a kiss on his forehead. "Never."

"Even if I was mean to you?"

"It’s okay to feel things, Leo,” I said. “We just have to learn how to feel them without hurting other people. Okay?"

He nodded.

I exhaled slowly, finally able to breathe.

Selena came over, kneeling beside us. "Hey there, future heartbreaker. Do you want to help me stir this sauce?"

Leo nodded again, moving silently from my arms and into hers.

I trailed behind them into the kitchen.

My hands still trembled from the whole ordeal.

Because if a six-year-old girl could bring Leo to the brink with a question, how long before Cassian Thornwell met his eye and saw himself?

And how much longer was I supposed to pretend that I had control over any of it?