Something Money Can't Buy (MxM)

Contradictions (1)

Something Money Can’t Buy

Volume 1

Takano Masamune

Chapter 1: Contradictions (1)

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Do I feel motivated by money in my work? Of course I do! Who doesn’t?

I am sick of people complaining to me about it. Everyone… My family, my friends, colleagues, every last one of them tells me such obvious lies…

It’s a good thing I’ve cut ties with those people a long, long time ago… I don’t have need for people who can’t even try to understand me. People who won’t even look at me unless they need money...

‘Money can’t buy you happiness’?  Yeah, right you can suck it if you think I’ll believe that kind of bullshit…

Everyone says that, and then they have the audacity to come to me and ask for money!

I’m sick of it! Everyone is trying to use me in one way or another and in the end I somehow turn out to be the bad one? Yeah, f**k that.

It’s better to be alone than surrounded by those filthy scums…

The world is filled with contradictions, this damned God forsaken world is nothing but a place filled with twisted desire…

Don’t get me wrong, I am no different than all those other success seeking, money swindling, good for nothing people out there.

I might be a bit more self aware than them but that’s about it.

I don’t want to sound like the good guy, because I’m not.

Even if I was abused, used by others and ultimately abandoned… Discarded like an object that no longer served its purpose…

I am not the victim, I have full power and control over my circumstances, so I won’t blame others for my actions.

 I will be the one to ultimately decide my fate.

Yet… My mind that seems to be twisted beyond repair still wants to feel other people’s abuse, instead of love.

It’s funny, isn’t it? I tried so hard to escape my circumstances just to end up in the same position but on my own terms…

I want to top, but I also want to bottom…

I want to use, but I also want to be used…

I want to torture, but I also want to be tortured…

These kind of contradictions are what makes up my life and the world as a whole. It’s first one thing then another.

It’s bright as day and then suddenly it’s a dark maze that you get lost in endlessly.

How rude of me, I haven’t even introduced myself but I began rambling about things that you probably don’t understand…

If it’s any use then… my name is Henry Lardwhile. I’m part of something you youngsters might call ‘the mafia’ but it’s a little bit different…

However I don’t see a reason to fill your head needlessly with the inner workings of our organization.

All you really need to know is that, it’s the worst place to be if you have even a single weakness. If you have something you hold dear then you’ve already lost before you’ve even began.

Me on the other hand… I have no wekanessess because I have nothing. Nothing, not a single thing… Be it material, or spiritual.

I have no fate in any religion, I have no belongings that I would miss if they were destroyed, I don’t have a lover or comrades that I’d die for. And as I mentioned previously I cut off all contact with my family that wanted nothing but money from me.

So in a way I’d say I’m invincible. That’s also the reason why I’ve managed to make it so far in this world. Currently where I stand I am a cut above the rest in every single way… Because I have nothing to lose, I have everything to gain.

That’s also what brought me here…

Standing in front of this beaten half to death man that doesn’t even want to plead for his life… Ah… I don’t know if I feel bad for him or if I want to make him cry…

He seems to be about his late twenties? No, younger… Maybe he’s early twenties. Has quite the handsome face for someone who just got beat up so much by my men. Wait, why did I have them beat him up again? I’m getting sidetracked on the job… That’s no good. Hm… Oh, yes I remember!

This guy here… He had previously beat up my bodyguard with his bare hands mind you! I was so impressed that I wanted to test him out. To see how strong he really is… But this is rather disappointing. It only took me five men to beat him to a bloody pulp. Then yet my men are trained fighters and he doesn’t seem to be as experienced but he still managed to hold his own for so long…

Forget what I just said, this isn’t disappointing at all! It’s exhilarating! I’ve never seen someone so strong, not to mention that he didn’t even squeak, nor try to plead for his life…

How amusing… Oh no… I think I’m taking an interest in him… I wonder would he be good in bed?

“Hey, bring him here!” I yelled to my men and they brought the half dead guy in front of me and made him kneel. This is bad… I feel like my sadistic streak is calling me again. “Tell me your name.” I asked him as I leaned closer to look at his handsome face.

“……” He however didn’t want to speak with me at all. Does he hate me already? That seems good…

“What is it? You can’t speak or you don’t want to talk to me?” I asked him as I couldn’t help but smirk while looking at his ripped up clothes and battle scars.

“…Garett…” The man answered in a low voice, yet he didn’t sound scared at all.

“Do you have a last name or is it just that one?” I asked as I backed away from the man. It’s not like I really want to know his full name that badly, but he interests me. I want to hear him talk more.

“Garett Esteen.” He answered in his dominating tone of voice. Why am I getting so turned on by this guy? He seems like the type to tear me apart if I were to sleep with him… Wouldn’t that be great…

“Then Garett, would you like to make a deal with me?” I asked as I took out the box of cigarettes from my pocket and lit one up casually.

“What deal?” The man seemed slightly surprised but other than a sudden widening of his eyes, he did not show much emotion on his face.

“Since you beat up my previous bodyguard, I’d like you to replace him for me.” Honestly even I don’t know why I suggested that. I guess I just felt like it.

“……” Garett seemed to be thinking seriously about my offer. It truly surprised me he did not instantly reject me. But what surprised me more was his answer after that long silence. “Alright.” He agreed, that crazy guy actually agreed to my suggestion so easily… At that point I thought he might have done it just to escape being murdered but somehow he seemed to be sincere. Despite his indifferent expression, I thought he looked like an honest person. Ah… I want to tear him apart so badly and yet I want him to tear me apart as well…

“Then come with me to my office now…” I said as I gestured to my men to release him. None of them complained and simply did as they were told.

Garett stood up without a word and followed me silently to my car without asking needless questions. I’m amazed at how calm he seems, it’s almost like he’s one of us…

“Are you part of a gang?” I asked the man in the backseat of the car as we rode back to my office.

“No.” Garett answered without hesitation, judging by his voice he wasn’t lying either.

“How old are you?” I asked as I thought he wouldn’t mind answering.

“I’m 25.” He answered just as quickly and without hesitation.

“Do you go to school or work?” I asked while trying not to look behind myself. Ah… I want to see his face so badly but my intentions would become too obvious if I did.

“Neither. I got released from prison several days ago.” Garett answered me in the most indifferent tone he possibly could. I was once again left impressed by him.

“What were you in prison for?” I asked while glancing at the side mirror and seeing Garett’s reflection in it.

“Fighting a police officer.” He answered and stared off at the window.

“Haha… Somehow you’re hard to read you know that?” I couldn’t hold back from laughing at how ridiculously honest the man was with me. He confessed so many things just because I asked that it left me feeling a bit guilty. But just a tiny little bit so.

“I hear that a lot.” Garett said while looking at the side miror and directly into my eyes.

“Hey, have you heard of the name Henry Lardwhile?” I asked as that name was very well known in the underworld. I assumed that this guy wouldn’t be searching for an honest job,, so he might know of me.

“I have.” Garret said as he continued to stare at the side mirror and look at me.

“What have you heard about him?” I asked, this was a fun little game I liked to play with others. I’m really interested in knowing other’s opinions on me.

“Nothing good.” Garret answered as he seemingly lost interest in the subject.

“What exactly? With examples if you will~” I said in a cheery tone as if I was trying to mock myself by listening to the insults others throw at me indirectly.

“A man with no morals, one who spread his legs for anyone at any time, disgusting homosexual, but…” Garret stopped suddenly after recalling several insults that he’d heard about me. Oh come on! It just got good, you can’t stop like that!

“But?” I urged him to continue his train of thought.

“…but he has a nice face.” Garret finally said and looked at the side mirror once more.

“I see, that’s good to know. I had no idea I was so famous for my good looks! I probably should have tried modeling instead, what do you think? Am I handsome?” I decided to tease the man as I spoke cheerfully, taking the insults as compliments.

“……” Garret seemed to hesitate once more. Given by how openly he managed to tell me all that until now I see no reason for him not to be able to tell me more. Or is it that he thinks I’m ugly?

“Come on, I won’t hurt you anymore, what I did before was because of my lost bodyguard. You can tell me if you think I’m hard on the eyes.” I said as to reassure him that I wouldn’t take it badly no matter what he said.

“…I don’t think you’re handsome… Rather a better way to describe it would be, beautiful I guess.” Garret said with a straight face as we locked eyes in the side mirror.

“Beautiful? That’s a word I haven’t heard once in my life! Haha! You really are interesting!” I couldn’t hold back my laughter, it’s not that common to hear a grown man like me called ‘beautiful’. This person seems so interesting…

“It’s my opinion.” Garret said in his low and dominating voice that sent shivers down my spine.

“Tell me more, you seem to have interesting taste! Oh, wait first we should probably go inside.” I was so lost in the conversation that I barely noticed how the driver had already parked in front of my office. I felt like I was having a light hearted chat with a classmate, maybe I’m feeling a bit nostalgic about old times?

Garret silently walked behind me as I led the way to my office. I specifically instructed nobody to enter in the next hour. Since everyone in the office was already used to me doing this, none of them complained or questioned my orders.

***

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