"How did I just know you would pull a stunt like this, Aaron?"
"Because you are psychic?"
"No. Because, you are an i***t. But I knew that, so I put my actual gown in this bag here," I hold up my black backpack. "and the dress currently dripping cranberry juice is just a cover dress."
"Damn!" He pouts, looking sincerely dejected.
"You jerk! You were really going to douse me with juice minutes before we got on the yacht? Without any surprise backup dress??!!"
I wrench the passenger's door open and scour the place for a bag that would redeem him. I find nothing.
"Calm down, Rapunzel."
I reach forward to shake him senseless but he dodges with a chuckle.
"Don't you dare tell me to calm down, you good for nothing son of a motherless evil-man!"
I bite my lips as my words register in my b
