Beauty Bleeds

ProloguePart2

Later

“Attention, attention please,” my father cleared his throat and tapped his fork to his champagne flute. “I want to thank all of you for gifting us with your presence to celebrate and honor my daughter, Serena, for her 18th birthday dinner,” he bellowed in his deep baritone voice as he locked eyes with me. Father considered me to be his pride and joy. His most valuable treasure. Everyone surrounding the table in our banquet hall erupted into cheers, some wishing me a happy birthday. Others gave me appreciative looks, marvelling about how beautiful I turned out.

I wasn’t conceited by any means, but 18 years of training made sure I knew how to primp and pamper myself. I was 5’2 with raven black waist length wavy hair, a smooth milky complexion, and glacier blue eyes. My body was toned, yet soft. I was beautiful, Mother made sure of it. I could hear her in my mind now, “Serena, if you want to keep Lucas’s attention and make sure a cheating scandal stays out of the papers, you MUST keep his attention. Nobody wants an unkempt wife.” She started drilling that lesson into me on my 9th birthday after a fall from my bicycle left my clothes stained and my hair unruly. Now, after years of training, she looked at me with approval in her eyes. I locked eyes with Mother just as she gestured for me to sit up straight.

The dinner was winding down, I practically ran up to my room eager for the night’s events. The birthday dinner was considered a must, my 18th birthday was a social event afterall. Everything was a social event in the Sterling family. The afterparty however, was for the young people alone. Jasmyn wouldn’t let this day go by only being celebrated by “a bunch of boring old snobs” as she referred to them. She was a great friend. When I got to my room I tore off my dinner dress, eager to finally put on the perfect party dress. A strapless, velvet, burgundy mini dress hugged my form. I looked in the mirror, turning left to right, appreciating how the material clinged to my body. My breasts filled it out perfectly, and the velvet kissed my curves and hugged my bubble butt just right. I put on a diamond choker, and pulled the hairpin out that was holding my perfectly sculpted bun in place on the side of my head. I stood and watched as my hair cascaded down around me, did one final twirl in the mirror, and decided it was perfect. Just as I strapped on my four inch black velvet heels, the doorbell rang, and our family butler announced that Lucas Vaughn had arrived. Butterflies filled my stomach and I squealed. I grabbed my phone and threw it in my clutch before sprinting from the room, remembering that Mother said rushing to meet a man was disgraceful, I slowed my pace. As I started to descend the staircase into our grand foyer, voices and laughter from below rose up to greet me. There he was.

Lucas Vaughn was beautiful. His 6’0 frame had a slim, muscular build. He had short, curly blonde hair that kissed his perfectly bronzed skin. He was wearing khaki slacks and the short sleeved button down shirt I got for him was untucked, giving him a relaxed and tastefully disheveled look. The color perfectly complemented his blue eyes that turned to look at me as he smiled, his dimples almost stopped me in my tracks. My breath hitched in my throat, before I could make a fool of myself Father’s voice snapped me out of getting lost in the gorgeous man that stood before me, “Serena darling, I’m sure I don’t need to remind you to be a perfect lady this evening.”

“Of course not,” I smiled sweetly at him, “I’m well aware of the rules. Have fun, stay out of the media.”

“They’re always looking for a reason to cast our family in an unsavory manner to the public eye,” Mother miffed. She was a classic, sophisticated woman. Disgracing myself, would be disgracing her by extension as far as she was concerned. Before I could respond, Lucas grabbed my hand, “You don’t have anything to worry about Mr. and Mrs. Sterling. Serena is in excellent hands.” Mother and Father visibly relaxed, told us to have fun, and then we were off. I climbed into Lucas’s Range Rover, hardly able to contain my excitement. I was almost giddy when he offered to drive me to Jasmyn’s family’s beach house for my party.

“Thank you again for driving me,” I said softly to Lucas. “You’re my girl Serena, what kind of guy would I be if I didn’t escort you to your 18th birthday party?” He chuckled. Smiling sweetly at him I replied, “Still, thank you.” For the first few moments we rode in silence, listening to the radio. Lucas played every single song he knew I loved. Listening to him sing along filled my soul with warmth and contentment, I was bursting with happiness, and soon couldn’t help singing along with him. He knew me better than anyone else, even Mother or Jasmyn. Lucas never had to ask what I wanted to eat or drink, what my favorite color was, and sometimes I could swear he was reading my mind. We were perfectly in tune with each other.

After about 10 minutes, we rolled up the mile-long driveway leading to the Warren family beach house. I chuckled to myself, thinking that “beach house” was an understatement for the mansion that stood before me. I suppose it did sit on its own private beach. As I mused to myself, I noticed out of my peripheral vision that Lucas was staring at me. A soft warm blush tinged my cheeks under the weight of his stare, I turned to look at him. His eyes were filled with adoration, they roamed over my small frame, and I noticed something else there in his gaze…longing. He turned to rummage around in his back seat for a moment, and pulled out an envelope with a triumphant “Yes!”

“This isn’t your only gift from me tonight, but I wanted to make sure I gave you this before we went inside,” he murmured softly and handed me the bright red envelope. I gently tore it open and pulled out a birthday card as a smile ornamented my face. I read it aloud, “To the most beautiful girl on her birthday.” When I opened it, two small square pieces of paper fell onto my lap. I picked them up and examined them in my hands. “Temporary tattoos?’ I quizzically asked. He blushed slightly, “I know how bad you’ve always wanted a tattoo, and I know your family’s rules about those things.” I couldn’t help how happy this small gesture made me. One of the small tattoos was an ornate padlock with small botanical elements surrounding it and a heart shaped keyhole, the other was a matching key. He answered my silent question, “The padlock is for you and the key is for me. It’s symbolic.” He ran his hands through his hair nervously, making me realize he was waiting for my reaction. All I could do was smile, “Lucas, it’s so perfect.” A grin lit up his face, he reached into the backseat again, this time producing a bottle of water and napkin. “We can wear them for the party,” he said as he took my hand and turned it to reveal my wrist, he gently kissed the flesh and then applied my tattoo. When he was finished I admired it, I loved this man. After returning the favor and applying his tattoo, Lucas ushered me up the large front steps and we walked into the party.

Music greeted us, the loud bass and rhythms floated through the house. An ocean of bodies pressed tightly against each other, moving in sync with the beat. As he ushered me through the crowd, people turned to say hello or wish me happy birthday. Guys shook Lucas’s hand and whooped and yelled, their alpha male had finally arrived. “You’re finally here!!” Jasmyn squealed as she pushed through the crowd, “I didn’t think your parents were ever going to let you leave.”

“You know how it is, it’d look awful if I ditched my own birthday dinner. ‘Appearances must be maintained’,” I mocked playfully in my mother’s voice. Jasmyn through her head back and laughed, “Our parents are the WORST! You should’ve heard the speech mine gave me before letting me use the beach house. I guess I should be grateful that they gave the speech themselves instead of delegating to the butler like last time.” My friend chattered animatedly as we walked to the kitchen. The kitchen was a large open space. On the center island snacks and bottles of liquor adorned the surface, Jasmyn grabbed three shot glasses and poured vodka into them, “Jasmyn you know I hate vodka!” I whined. As she rolled her eyes, she pushed the shot glass in my hand, “Vodka works quick! You need to loosen up. What kind of friend would I be if I let you celebrate it sober?” As she turned her shot glass up to drink, she held mine out for me. I thought ‘to hell with it’ and downed my drink. The vodka was smooth but burned, I could feel the liquid drain all the way down my chest as arms suddenly wrapped around me. “Got one for me?” Lucas whispered in my ear.

My face caught fire as I smiled and turned around, standing nose to nose with Lucas. I grabbed his shot glass and handed it to him with a coy look in my eyes. Without breaking eye contact, Lucas emptied the contents into his mouth before crashing his lips to mine. His smooth tongue caressed my lips, when I parted my mouth to grant his access, the smooth vodka he downed filled my mouth. I had to admit, it tasted a lot better coming from him. I could hear Jasmyn cheering, “Yasss girl!” but my focus was on Lucas. He led me to the dance floor and we pressed our bodies against each other as the music swirled around us. We danced for what felt like hours, occasionally someone would bring us another shot. I’d down mine, Lucas would kiss his into my mouth over and over again. After a while the liquor didn’t burn going down, and it made it easier to fully relax and give my body over to the siren call of the music.

I heard one of the guys call Lucas. He walked away and I continued to sway my hips and put my hands above my head dancing. Serving trays with liquor kept circulating through the room, I had to admit, I was having a great time so I kept downing shots. It was my party afterall. After what must have been the tenth shot, I felt a cold sweat break out across my body, oh no. I rushed off the dance floor to the nearest bathroom and just barely made it to the toilet before vomiting. “Oooooo,” I groaned out. I hardly ever drank this much and now that I was no longer dancing I was feeling the full effects. My eyes became heavy and I laid my head down on the toilet seat, s**t, why did I drink this much? Jasmyn stumbled into the bathroom and as she raked her eyes over my crumpled form cuddling the toilet she laughed and asked, “Someone party a little too hard?” All I could do was groan in response, scared that if I opened my mouth again that more than words would come out of it. “That’s okay,” she giggled, “you can crash in one of the guest rooms. I’ll text your mother and let her know we decided to turn this into a slumber party.” I used all my strength to give her a weak thumbs up and handed her my phone. She tapped out a quick message on my phone, and then helped me off the floor. Throwing one of my arms across her shoulder, she supported the weight of my body and helped walk me to the guest room. Once we got to the room Jasmyn pushed me onto the bed, she pulled my shoes off of my feet and tossed them into the corner. “You’ll be fine once you get some sleep,” she said as she covered me with the throw blanket that was laying across the foot of the bed. “You’re sssuch a great friend,” I managed to slur out. She shook her head and smiled, “You’d do it for me.” Then she exited the room.

**TRIGGER WARNING: GRAPHIC S*XUAL CONTENT, S*XUAL ASSAULT**

As I lay there the room felt like it was simultaneously spinning and wobbling back and forth, like that old school carnival attraction “Shake Shack”. I closed my eyes to ease the motion sickness, and before long darkness enveloped me, and I slipped into a drunken sleep.

As I awoke, I felt groggy. My head was pounding and there was a burning taste in the back of my throat. Why do I ever drink? I had the liquor tolerance of a squirrel. I laid there with my eyes closed and took a mental inventory of what I was feeling. Pounding headache, check. Nausea, check. General ick, check check. As I slowly slipped into a full consciousness I noticed something else, a warmth covering my entire body. There was a weight on top of me I couldn’t explain, I weakly tried to adjust myself under this uncomfortable mystery wait. That didn’t work. What was this? I used all of my strength to open my eyes, as I cracked them open they met a pair of blue eyes looking down at me. My blood ran cold. “Lucasss?” I slurred out. “Just relax baby,” he whispered as he planted sloppy wet kisses down my neck. I smiled weakly, we had made out before of course, but I was usually conscious for it. “No Lucas, I feel so gross right now,” I sighed out weakly as I tried to gently push him off of me, he grabbed my small wrists in one hand and pinned them above my head. “It’s fine, just relax, all I need you to do is lay there,” he said in my ear. “Lucas seriously, I’m not in the mood to make out, let me up,” I tried to pull my wrists from his hand so I could push him off of me, but he tightened his grip, it was starting to hurt. “Let me go, you’re squeezing me too tight,” I wriggled under him trying to free myself. In response to my movements under him Lucas grunted, he used his knee to force my legs apart and started grinding himself on me.

“I’m not having fun Lucas, seriously, get off of me now,” this was effectively sobering me up. What was his problem? We had made out before, but it was nothing like this. He used his other hand to run up the length of my body, starting at my thigh. Working his way up, he roughly grabbed my breast and squeezed it before crashing his lips down onto mine. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth and bit down on it so hard that tears sprang to my eyes, I tasted blood. When I gasped, he forced his tongue so deep into my mouth it was hard to breath, I thought I would choke on it. I started wriggling under him harder, using all of my strength to buck him off, but it was no use. He was so much stronger than I was. I bit down on his tongue and he jerked his head back, but refused to relinquish the grip he had on my wrists. “Son of a b***h Serena,” he glared down at me, “you wanna play rough?”

The hand fondling my breast reached up and wrapped around my throat, he squeezed so tightly that it slightly cut off my air way.

He wasn’t going to stop.

How did he feel heavier all of a sudden?

Air…I need air.

How did I never notice how much the sound of his voice sets me on edge?

I was able to take in little gasps of air, I tried to scream but it only came out in a strangled whisper, “Lucas stop, get off of me, please.” He smiled at me, but it wasn’t like the smile from earlier, there was something in the way he smiled and looked at me that I couldn’t quite place…it scared me. I now started thrashing violently under him. This was a game for him, he laughed, and relaxed more on top of me to make himself heavier. He tightened his vice like grip around my wrists, it felt like they would snap, I knew there would be a bruise. “You’re such a little tease Serena. I know you want me too,” the menacing whisper brushed over my face and I felt bile rise in the back of my throat.

He has to let me go, he’s drunk, he doesn’t mean this.

I did the only thing I could think of to try and snap him out of this, I pushed my head into the mattress, and with all of my might I slammed it into his. “f**k,” he yelled out, but didn’t move off of me or let my wrists go. All I effectively did was make my own vision spin, my head fell back into the mattress while I tried to force my eyes back into focus again. At least he let go of my throat, he clumsily reached down to the hem of my dress and roughly forced it up around my waist. “How am I going to explain a bruise on my face Serena?” he questioned as he reached for the thin silk thong I was wearing. My body froze.

I couldn’t physically overpower him off of me, so I started pleading with him, “Please Lucas no, I’m not ready, please get off of me, we can forget this ever happened. I won’t tell anyone.”

Trying to speak reason to him, my mind was racing, thinking a thousand different things at once. All of my simultaneous thoughts came to a crashing halt when he laughed, “Who would believe you anyways?”

Then he ripped my panties off of me. Tears sprang to my eyes and threatened to spill.

But…my life was perfect.

I tried to dumbly convince myself that at any moment he would sober up and realize the mistake he was about to make.

The sound his pants zipper made as he lowered it was deafening, triggering me to remember that he never actually swallowed any of his shots. He put them all in my mouth.

At that moment I felt him start to push inside of me, my body was terrified and dry. Pain ripped through me and I started to scream. He wrapped his hand around my throat and whispered into my ear, “Be a good girl and relax.” I felt a pull on my mind, and relinquished my control to the phantom friend.

My mental self drifted away somewhere far from here. Darkness consumed my physical shell, then I blacked out.

When I woke up, pain consumed my body. How long had I been unconscious? The events played back in my mind like a conscious nightmare. Lucas…how could he?

Lucas.

No.

No. No. No.

He wouldn’t…

My shoes.

Where are my shoes?

Mom.

I need mom.

I pictured his smiling, sweet face in my mind. That version of him was dead to me now. As I moved to sit up in the bed, the ache in my body pulled at me. Lucas was laying next to me sleeping, and had his arm thrown across me possessively. I moved as quietly as possible, walking on my tip toes. I needed to find my phone and my shoes. He started to stir in his sleep and my body became paralyzed in fear, f**k the shoes. I slipped out of the door to the bedroom. Where was my phone? Then I remembered Jasmyn texting my mother for me. The house was quiet, it had to be either very late or very early. I walked quietly through Jasmyn’s house, when I passed a mirror I froze. Taking in the image before me, my body shuddered. Blood was crusted and dry on my thighs, my cheek had a small cut on it. A hand shaped bruise on my throat. My usually neatly styled hair, wild and sticking up in all directions. I shuddered. Lucas appeared in the mirror behind me, “There you are, I was looking everywhere for you.” I spun around quickly, refusing to have my back to him and took several steps back. “Stay away from me, don’t touch me,” I said in a shaking voice. I wanted it to sound strong and silently cursed myself for how weak I sounded. “What’s wrong baby?” He asked me, looking confused.

Was he serious? “Are you f*****g kidding me Lucas? ‘What’s wrong?’ I am NOT your baby.” He took a step toward me with his arm out, and I bolted before he could touch me. Abandoning my shoes and my phone, I ran for the front door. When I got to it and threw it open and just kept running. I heard Lucas calling out to me, but I didn’t care. I just had to get away from him. My thoughts were racing as fast as my feet. Images of Lucas and our childhood, our lives together were flashing through my mind. I trusted him. He was supposed to be my provider and protector, my future husband.

He stole something I could never choose to give again.

He stole my choice.

My eyes stung with tears that threatened to spill, no. I wouldn’t allow him to have those too.

I ran for what seemed like forever, finally I made it back to Sterling Estate. Mother and Father would know what to do, they would take care of this. They would keep me safe. I burst through the front door into our foyer and crashed into a decorative table we had lining the wall. Allen, the butler, rushed in and took a shocked step back at my appearance. His hand flew to his mouth, “Oh you poor child.” At that, my legs gave out from under me and I dissolved into the tears I had been holding back. My body was shaking violently as I was racked with sobs. “I’ll go get Master and Madam Sterling!” Allen ran up the grand staircase.

Mother and Father almost flew down the stairs, taking inventory of the crumpled mess on the floor that was their daughter. Father started barking orders at Allen as Mother helped me to my feet silently, and ushered me into the study.

The crackling from the fireplace in the study was deafening. It was too warm.

I wanted to crawl inside it until I stopped shaking.

Mother sat me on the loveseat, placing herself next to me, Father sat in the arm chair opposite us and stared at me. Allen rushed in and draped a blanket around my shoulders, then quietly excited the room, shutting the doors behind him. As I wrapped the blanket around myself more, wishing I could disappear into the soft fabric, I could feel the weight of Mother and Father’s eyes upon me. My father cleared his throat, “Serena, we can’t help you unless we know what happened. I know it may be difficult, but I need you to tell us what happened.” I sighed. How would I tell my parents that my promised betrothed robbed me of what innocence I had? I arranged my words carefully in my head until I was satisfied and confident, but when I opened my mouth to say them, “Lucas r*ped me,” fell out and I was overcome by sobs again. Mother gasped behind her hand and silently started crying, Father just sat in his chair quietly with a pensive look on his face. He asked quietly, “Are you certain?”

I nodded my head numbly, unable to speak. I couldn’t look directly into either of their eyes, tucking my legs into my chest, every inch of exposed skin felt wrong. I felt horribly vulnerable. How would I ever look in their eyes again? We shared a few more quiet moments before mother whispered out, “Were you both drinking?” My mind screeched to a stop, I was confused by the question. It seemed like a reasonable enough question, but something about it was just so wrong. I mustered the strength and looked into Mother’s eyes, “Um..yes we were, well I was, Lucas was giving me all of his drinks,” I started to ramble, interrupted when Father spoke to Mother, “Do you understand what this will do? We have to handle this quietly.”

Mother quietly cried harder when Father made up his mind. She started to reach for my hand, and then stopped herself before pulling her hand back.

It felt like that small movement had struck me.

I stood up and quietly left the room.

They were supposed to help me, save me, protect ME. I looked around the room and it all sunk in. They weren’t interested in helping me, they were concerned with keeping this story out of the media. I ran up the stairs, hardly breathing, and burst through the door to my bedroom. The scene before me started to spin violently, my mind racing again. I was heartbroken by what Lucas did. I was destroyed by what my parents did. Did I want them to contain it? Could I go on and still marry Lucas and live the lie that everything is perfect? I quickly made up my mind, grabbing a bag out of my closet and throwing random clothes and shoes into it. I opened my laptop and navigated to the website for our bank. I transferred $50,000 from my dependent account under my parents’ name to my personal account, then slammed my laptop closed and threw it in my bag too.

I looked around the room that had been a haven my entire life.

The picture of Lucas and I on my vanity crushed me. The girl in that photo was happy and carefree.

The dress I bought on a whim for what I imagined would be my engagement party. Wouldn’t need that now.

The promise ring in my jewelry box…

I heard a soft knock on the door. Cracking it open, Allen stood there, looking at me with pain in his eyes. Allen had been our family butler for my entire life. He chauffeured me, came to all of my extracurricular activities, and picked me up when I fell. In a lot of ways, he was more of a parent to me than my own biological parents were.

“Ms. Serena, is there anything I can do? Do you need me to get you anything?” He asked, concern dripping from his tone. “They want to cover it up, Allen. They want to spin it for the public eye as if it never happened. They’re more concerned with their precious reputation,” the words just fell out of my mouth, tears still streamed down my face, but they fell from somewhere different within me now. I was hurt, heartbroken, angry…betrayed. “I’m leaving. I won’t stay here and live this lie. I can NOT marry that monster,” I gazed at him, determined, I had already made up my mind about what I needed to do. Allen stepped into the room and quietly shut the door behind him, he turned and squared his shoulders, “I always hoped I’d never have to put this plan in motion,” he paused to gauge my reaction before continuing, “Before you leave town go to a gas station and buy as many prepaid cards and get as much cash back as you can to empty out as much of your money as possible. When you’re done, destroy your card. Drive to this town, Jackson, a couple towns over,” he paused for a moment, considering his thoughts before continuing, “When you get into Jackson, there will be a small motel on your right called ‘Oasis Corners’. Get a room there for two nights. Tomorrow is my day off, I’ll meet you there and help you with everything you need to leave. Go fast sweet girl,” Allen pulled me into an embrace and then guided me down the service stairs and out the back entrance. Before I could walk away, he called out quietly, “Wait, don’t take your car, take mine.” He handed me the keys to his old beat down car, tears stung the back of my eyes again, I wasn’t aware I had stopped crying. “Thank you Allen,” and with that I turned and ran to his car.