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Well, certainly the divorce was devastating, but what could I do? My husband wanted out, and he was willing to pay for it. I didn’t even bother consulting a lawyer. I just signed the divorce papers and sent them back to him with a note that said, “You’re free,” signed with my maiden name.
But after that, I wasn’t sure what to do with myself. I sulked around the house for a few days, only going out to walk the dog. So strong was my desire to be alone, I even started ordering delivery. I found out that the grocery store around the corner offered delivery, straight to my doorstep. I signed up on the spot (over the phone, of course) and settled into my comfortable new life as a hermit.
I caught up on a lot of reading and abused my Netflix subscription by watching every sappy movie I could think of. I may or may not have gone through boxes of tissues as I cried out my feelings of failure over Sleepless in Seattle. I never expected to be a divorcee at age 45 - this was not part of my life plan, and the frustration, disappointment, and heartbreak that came over me in waves, came out of me in tears.
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