Fragile Hope

1911 Words
CAMELLIA It's been three days. Seventy-two hours since I lay on a white hospital bed and let strangers place a future inside me. I stood behind the bar polishing the same glass for the third time, even though it already shone under the dim amber lights. My fingers moved automatically. My mind didn’t. What if it didn’t work? The thought slipped in quietly but settled heavily. What if my body rejected it? What if all the hormones, the supplements, the careful steps meant nothing? What if I had let myself hope too soon? “Cam.” Maya’s voice cut through the music humming low in the background. She leaned her elbows on the counter, eyes narrowing at me. “You’re scrubbing that glass like it insulted your family.” I blinked. “Sorry.” “You’ve been off all evening.” I set the glass down carefully. “It’s only been three days.” “And?” “And what if it doesn’t work?” My voice lowered. “What if my body just… says no?” I blurted. Maya sighed, softer now. She came around the counter and stood beside me. “They timed it perfectly,” she said. “You said they tracked your ovulation, right? These clinics don’t guess, Cam. They calculate.” I nodded, but fear doesn’t disappear because logic exists. “I just—” I swallowed. “I didn’t expect to care this fast.” That was the part I hadn’t prepared for. I told myself this was a transaction. A contract. A biological service. But three days later, I found myself walking more slowly, no longer sleeping on my back, drinking more water, and resting my hand low on my stomach. Every time I reached for coffee, I hesitated. Every time I felt even the slightest twinge in my abdomen, my mind jumped. My stomach was still flat. “You’re allowed to feel something,” Maya said quietly. “Even if it’s not your baby.” I gave her a weak smile. “You still don’t like this.” “No,” she admitted. “But I like you. And if you’re doing this, then I’m supporting you.” Before I could respond, the bar door slammed open hard enough to rattle the frame. The music faltered as heads turned. My stomach dropped before I even saw him. Jason. He walked in like he owned the place, jaw tight. “Camellia!” he called out, scanning the room until his eyes landed on me. My chest tightened instantly. “Not tonight,” I muttered under my breath. He strode toward the counter, ignoring the fact that this was my workplace. Ignoring the customers. “We need to talk.” “We don’t,” I replied flatly, grabbing a tray and stepping around him. He moved in front of me, blocking my path. “Stop running from me.” “I’m working.” “You’ve been avoiding me for three days.” “I’ve been living my life.” His eyes flicked down to my midsection, then back up. “Why were you coming out of a fertility clinic?” My pulse thudded in my ears. “That’s none of your business.” “So something is going on.” He let out a short laugh. “You married some old rich guy?” Maya stepped forward. “She said it’s none of your business. You need to lower your voice, Jason.” Jason ignored her. “You’re making a mistake,” he said under his breath. “I can take care of you now. I have money. I’m not the same guy.” I stared at him. This was the same man who cheated on me weeks after my parents’ funeral. The same man who said I was “too emotional” when I couldn’t stop crying at night. “You cheated on me with my boss.” He flinched but recovered quickly. “That was two years ago. It was a mistake.” he hissed. “And it was a bigger mistake on my part for trusting you.” His jaw tightened. “You’re stubborn, Cam. Always have been.” Customers were watching and whispering now. “You’re going to regret this,” he snapped. “You think you can do better than me?” “I know I can,” I replied sharply. His expression darkened. “Look at you,” he scoffed. “You’re still working in a bar,” he sneered quietly. “Still struggling. You think whatever this is—” his eyes flicked downward briefly, “—is going to fix that?” The words hit harder than I expected. Maya stepped in front of me. “You need to leave.” Jason laughed. “Or what?” The music cut abruptly. A chair scraped softly across the floor. From the VIP section, a tall man in a black suit walked down to us. I hadn’t noticed him before. He had broad shoulders. Clean cut. Silent authority in every step. He walked toward us without rushing. He stopped in front of Jason. “You’re causing a disturbance,” he said evenly. “Time to go.” Jason scoffed. “Who the hell are you?” “Someone who doesn’t repeat himself.” Jason squared his shoulders. “This is between her and me.” The man didn’t blink. “It isn’t anymore.” Before Jason could react, the stranger gripped his arm firmly and steered him toward the door. Jason struggled briefly. “Camellia! You’re making a huge mistake! You’re going to regret this!” The door shut behind him. Then the music resumed, or became louder in my ears. Why can't Jason just let me be? How did he even find me? I erased everything about me on social media, kept a low profile because of him and now he is back. The suited man returned to us. “You might want security at both entrances,” he said calmly to Maya. “Front and back.” Maya nodded quickly. “Thank you...” “Vince,” he introduced shortly. “Thank you, Vince,” I said, meaning it. If it wasn't for him, I don't know how this encounter would have turned out. Maya recovered first. “Your drinks are on the house tonight.” A small smile tugged at his mouth. “Appreciated.” He turned and walked back toward the VIP section. And that’s when I let myself glance up. Then I saw him sitting in the VIP section. He was watching. His posture was relaxed, but his gaze was sharp and controlled. For a split second, our eyes met. Then he looked away, as if I hadn’t existed. My stomach flipped. “Cam,” Maya whispered. I tore my gaze away. “What?” I muttered. “You saw him too, right?” “Yes.” “It's the man you slapped.” “I know.” "I would have asked him to leave, but the drinks he ordered are expensive and the other bartenders said he tips very well. I raised a brow. Maya, however, was not subtle. She continued to watch Vince walk back to the VIP area. “You’re staring,” I murmured. She snapped her head toward me. “Am not.” “You are.” “Okay fine,” she huffed. “He’s handsome.” I smirked. “You’re falling.” “I am not falling.” “You are.” She sighed dramatically. “Fine. I am.” I laughed, tension easing just a little. The rest of the shift blurred into routine. Orders, laughter, clinking glasses, but beneath it all, my mind circled one thought. What if it didn’t work? By eight, we closed. I walked home slower than usual, exhaustion settling deep into my bones. Not just physical but emotional too. Inside my apartment, I locked the door and leaned against it for a moment. Silence wrapped around me. I love my apartment. It's small, cozy, and homely. It has one bedroom, a kitchen, a bathroom, and a balcony. Maya helped me get this apartment. I showered, letting warm water wash away the smell of alcohol and stress. I changed into an oversized T-shirt and soft shorts. Comfort clothes. I walked to the kitchen, reheated leftover spaghetti Bolognese, carried the bowl, curled up on the couch, and turned on the TV. My favorite show flickered on the screen. Sam & Cat. Don't judge me. I still watch cartoons. Something about it felt safe, funny, and predictable. I took a bite, finally allowing myself to relax. My phone beeped, but I ignored it. My mind just told me it's going to be the loan update. I took another bite from my spaghetti. "Hmmmmm." I moaned. This is the best meal I have eaten in days. Another beep came in again. I sighed and reached for it, still chewing. My banking app notification glowed at the top of the screen. Deposit Received. My heart skipped. I opened it. The amount stared back at me. I stopped chewing. The fork hovered mid-air. That number was real. The first installment. My breath caught. “Oh my God,” I whispered. I jumped off the couch so fast the bowl nearly tipped. “OH MY GOD!” I laughed, half crying, pacing the living room. It was enough to pay half of my student loans. For the first time in years, the weight shifted. I opened the email that followed. From: New Horizons Fertility Clinic. Subject: Confirmation of Initial Compensation. I scanned quickly. The payment covered the medical screening and the implantation phase. Further compensation would follow confirmation of pregnancy via blood testing in two weeks. Two weeks. I pressed my palm to my stomach. “Please,” I whispered again. “Please let it work.” I want to make a family happy and I also want to clear my debts. I twirled around the room, hugging my phone to my chest. This was real. This was happening. I couldn't breathe because of the excitement. I sat back down, heart racing with hope. For the first time in years, the future didn’t look like a tunnel. It looked like a door. I quickly ate my food and washed the dishes. I went back to the couch to continue watching more episodes. I was feeling sleepy. I checked the time and it was a few minutes to eleven. I turned off the TV and went to the room. My phone buzzed again from the table beside the bed. It was an unknown number. Unknown: We need to schedule an urgent follow-up appointment. Please confirm your availability as soon as possible. From: New Horizon Fertility Clinic A small chill crept up my spine. I stared at the screen, heart slowly beginning to pound again. My phone rang. I hesitated, then I answered. “Hello?” There was a pause on the other end. "Hello, it's Lina." I let out a breath of relief. “Ms. Walker,” Lina said carefully, “we need you to come in tomorrow.” My throat tightened. “Why? Is there something wrong?” She stayed silent for a few seconds before she replied. “It’s important. See you tomorrow. Have a good night, ma'am.” The line went dead. And just like that, the hope that had filled my chest moments ago began to fracture.
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