Reclaiming Her Heart

Chapter 50 - Holding On

Song Inspo: "Gallows" by Katie Garfield

Jadea

Caden sank to his knees.

There had only been one other time in our history he ever knelt before me. My stomach knotted, knowing this wasn't good. He'd been so broken and concerningly numb the last time ... And this time was far worse. A lost soul mate was involved.

Burying his face in my abdomen, his large hands clinging onto my hips and thighs like a lifeline, I felt him shatter.

How could I have missed this?

Instantly, my fingers delved into his thick hair as I cradled him against me, trying to make sense of everything. Trying to weather the storm. Trying to center myself enough to be his rock in the upheaval.

My gaze flickered unseeing as I fought to find clarity.

Fisting my hands, I tipped his head back. "Where is she?" I demanded, my gaze boring into his frantically. I hadn't found the answer within the tumultuous devastation of his mind. "Tell me!" I commanded, panic and power lacing my tone, my fingers twisting painfully.

"There's nothing you can do." His voice was jagged, like broken glass. "She's gone."

Gone...

"Show me," I snarled, not believing she was dead.

He shook his head frantically, a despairing hopelessness latching onto him. "Please, Jadea. I just want to forget. Please."

I knew what he was asking. I was a manipulator. I could easily weave a spell into anyone's mind, ranging from simple and harmless to deadly. I could rewrite someone's very history. I could force others to do my every will, or make them forget certain aspects of their lives. With such power came unlimited dark and dangerous possibilities and potential.

"Okay," I relented, my gaze refocusing on his, knowing I had to give in order to take. I saw the instant relief right before I snatched it back. "Under one condition: you have to show me everything."

Caden's bottom lip quivered at my stipulation, a war raging within his chest. Bowing his head, I felt his acceptance at my request.

Interlacing my hand with one of his, I slowly brought his hand to my lips. Kissing the vein on the inside of his wrist, I soothed the insurmountable pain coursing through him. Very tenderly, I sank my teeth into his flesh. He cried out, in both pain and carnal desire.

Within the thick tendrils of the deepest parts of his mind, I found my answers.

The Draconian pack had been one of my greatest assets when it came to the underground trafficking rings. Caden and several of his wolves entrenched themselves into the morally depraved and wretched practice.

Right before I was captured, Caden stumbled onto a primitive wolf pack somewhere in the Mid-West that had been deeply entrenched in the old--deplorably ruthless and vile--ways. Much like Malacoda—Caden's father and late alpha of the Draconian pack—had been. Malacoda abused his powers, desecrated his oaths. Violated his wolves and their sacred bonds in so many ways. Kept them compliant with fear and pain. He took anything and everything he wanted. No one, not bonded mates or his very children, were safe from his wrath. And the alpha from the Mid-West ran his pack the same way.

During this visit, Caden met his soul mate. Who had been bonded, and mated with, the old, haggard and malicious alpha. She had been very pregnant with her first child at that time.

The thing about it, was after a mate's bond was formed—even if it wasn't with a true soul mate—it was nearly impossible to break without subjecting either party to insurmountable pain and suffering. Even in death, the living mate suffered.

Before Caden could think to do anything to save her, he was hit with my tragic death. And then, when he was finally able to return to this predicament, she was gone. The entire pack just disappearing without a trace.

In the aftermath, Caden barely lived. Living solely for his pack. Taking his duty and oath with them to nearly an unhealthy obsession just to survive.

A small flicker of hope had taken hold when he'd learned I was alive and recovered safely.

He hadn't meant to come to me like this. Hadn't meant for this to get so complicated and out of hand. He reasoned, falling into this dynamic—helping Adam and I—would give him purpose. Something he could focus on in order to rebuild the foundation he'd shattered. He'd even started finding his footing within the turbulent and chaotic storm that was me as he led the very violent scenes.

But last night... Last night sent him spiraling over that ledge knowing he would never experience such a bond. Knowing both his true mate and I would always be just out of reach.

It was a heart-wrenching devastation of the soul.

"I have to help him." I told Adam, no room for argument in my tone. "And I am sorry if I cross a boundary." I wasn't going to lose him. Not like this. Not when I held the power to help him move past this. To survive.

I hadn't closed my mind from Adam, allowing him to see and feel everything.

He was concerned for Caden too.

Over the years, they became close friends. Seeing him like this... It broke open the raw dam of emotions surrounding the forlorn months following my disappearance.

"Do what you need to, baby girl. Just... keep your mind open with me." He needed transparency. Even if it did hurt.

"Oh, my little fox," I cooed, my fingers tracing over Caden's face as I refocused on him. He should never have embedded himself into our dynamic in such a head-space. At least not without first telling us about it.

Though, it was almost like the pot calling the kettle black.

Caden answered Adam's plea for help because I decided to keep secrets. It was because of me, Caden had been pulled into this mess—

"I do not feel like I was forced, mistress," he whispered, his mind tucked into a corner of mine. Witnessing every thought and feeling fluttering through me. "To be honest, I have felt more myself these past several days than I have in months. I knew I should have said something, but it didn't feel like the right time. You weren't in the right frame of mind to hear what I needed or help me overcome such an injustice."

His words hurt to hear, even if I understood and agreed with his reasoning.

"I never intended to keep it from you. Out of everyone, you would have known what to do. I just refused to dump it on you during your greatest time of need." He had been managing it well until last night. And now, he was tip-toeing on the edge of a sword: the blade cutting his feet as he fought not to fall into the madness of his despair. If he did... He would turn dark. Evil.

I knew such immortals well since my pack and I hunted such beings.

He was barely holding on.

"You will feel better soon, my little fox," I assured him, internally steeling myself for what was to come.