Reclaiming Her Heart

Chapter 37 - Caden

Adam

I needed space.

I needed to get out of that house.

To run and clear my head.

I was having a very hard time comprehending and accepting what Jadea had been secretly doing both before her escape and during our time together. I couldn't believe she'd been able to continue harming herself without my knowledge. It stung. I had to wonder if our bond had been fractured beyond repair due to what Silas had done?

Usually, I would have picked up on the slightest changes in her mood. I'd gotten so good at reading her silent shifts in thought, in the way her mind worked, this felt like such a reality check.

I didn't know her as well as I thought I did.

That cut deeper than anything else could.

Our bond was fractured; the damage more severe than I realized.

And it was so frustrating because there wasn't anything we could do to forcefully stop it.

We knew our boundaries would be tested.

She hadn't just tested them. She'd damn near shattered them.

She doesn't remember what we went through. She doesn't know the significance of this.

I wanted to be angry at her for her lack of trust and truthfulness. For trying to hide this from me. But, I just couldn't muster the emotion.

What I did know, though, was that I was out of my depth here. I didn't know how to move forward or even what to do to start this healing process for her.

There was only one other wolf she trusted indefinitely, whom she used to have a Dom/Sub relationship with before.

I raced towards the Draconian lands, feeling time biting at my heels.

As the perimeter came into view, I heard a lone wolf's howl echo across the land, alerting Caden—the Draconian alpha—to my approach. When I made the perimeter, Caden was waiting for me.

I wasn't sure what he knew about Jadea. If Ty told him of her safe recovery.

"Adam," Caden greeted. His large grey wolf with deep chocolate eyes studying me. Alpha wolves could communicate telepathically with each other without ever making any type of bond.

"Caden," I returned, winded.

"Is it Jadea?" he asked, anxiety lacing his tone.

"Yes." I opened my mind to him, showing everything I couldn't explain without wasting precious time.

"You did good, Adam," he praised seeing how I'd handled the situation, feeling the tendrils of my own self-doubt clouding my mind. With a jerk of his head, he motioned me to follow him. We both ran towards the large, plantation-style house at the heart of the Draconian lands. "I can help, but I should be there. She's going to fight, and I don't know how you or your wolf will be able to respond, especially since you've bound yourself to her by oath." Yes, that was part of the dilemma I faced. "Everything is going to be okay," he assured. "I just need to pack a few items and then we can go. You can fill me in on the rest as we head back to her."

I was thankful Caden was taking this seriously and wasn't wasting any time. I paced on the front porch, waiting for the Draconian alpha to gather what he needed and give direction to the others while he was gone. When he emerged, he had a very large dog pack secured to his back. I had to wonder what all he had in there.

"Supplies specific to her. You'll see," Caden answered my silent question.

Miles passed before Caden spoke again. "Tell me how you are feeling."

"Don't worry about me," I snapped.

"You can't properly care for her if you are holding back and not handling your own s**t too," he snarled back, the alpha and Dom in him showing. "If it helps, you don't have to answer me, you just need to be honest with yourself."

I chewed on his words for a while, knowing he was right. "I am afraid of losing her because of the path she is going down. I didn't even know she was cutting herself. I just got her back. What if she had cut too deep? What if she had bled out, and I didn't know?" All the fear of losing her while she was under my care flooded me.

"Deep breath, Adam," Caden commanded gently. When I was out of that tailspin, he continued. "She's alive. She's safe. And we are going to give her another outlet for that need to harm herself."

"How?"

As we charged into the mountains, he explained it to me. I remembered when Jadea did something similar when I couldn't stop telling myself I was a failure. She told me only she could tell me I was a failure. If I ever used it in reference to myself, I would be punished. During that time, we both had Dom/Sub dynamics that shifted based on the circumstances. Sometimes she dominated me, while during other times she was the submissive.

How Caden explained it, only he or I would be able to dole out such grueling punishments when she wanted to harm herself. Punishments involving items and situations that were hard no's for me.

We will make them soft no's if that is what she needs, my wolf snarled in my mind, no give in his tone. Caden will teach us. We will not go beyond our limits, or hers.

I relented. We would follow Caden's lead and see where everything landed before I made my final decisions.

"We are getting close," Caden stated. "Where is she? What is she doing?"

I touched her mind. She didn't even notice, so lost in her destructive mind. "She's running herself to death," I growled. Glad she hadn't tried to sneak away to cut herself again, and upset she found other ways to harm herself.

"She's very good at finding loopholes and testing the limits," Caden soothed understandingly.

"I screwed up. I didn't do my due diligence as her Dom before I left." I hadn't seen to her aftercare properly, so lost in my own mind and destructive thoughts.

"You have to take care of yourself too, Adam. You did the best you could, with the tools you had under the circumstances presented to you. You did good," he soothed. "She will recover, and she will be okay."

He sounded so certain. I prayed he was right.

"Do I have your permission to do whatever I have to in order to bring her to heel?" he asked, knowing if he didn't have both my wolf's and my support, this could go bad.

"Yes," we both agreed. We were out of our depth and at a loss of how to move forward in a positive progression.

"Call her in." He demanded as we crossed the perimeter and smelled her blood in the air.

I did, reaching out to her mind, ordering her to meet us at the house.

The moment we made the clearing, Caden shifted so he could drop his pack, then re-shifted back into his wolf and turned in the direction Jadea was coming from.

I expected emotional. I expected her to be angry at me asking Caden for help without discussing it with her first.

What I did not expect was the infuriated Jadea that was ready for war.

She crashed through the foliage and trees, her snarl meeting Caden's as they clashed in a savage battle.