Reclaiming Her Heart

Chapter 43 - Aftermath

Adam

Staring up at the ceiling, watching the natural light shift and darken as night fell while we lay together in the aftermath of our soul-shattering coupling was beautiful. The weight of her body on top of mine was soothing. Head tucked in the crook of my shoulder. Her breath washing over my chest. Hands trailing lazy paths across still sensitive skin. I was finally back home.

In the stillness, my mind wandered to the first time we completed the mate's bond. It did not compare to this one. I couldn't pinpoint why it was so different. Maybe it was the circumstances, the raw emotions, or her willingness to jump in with both feet, to blindly trust me when there was no history within her memory to work from. This was so vastly different than before.

While it felt like a lifetime passed since her return, we had only been back together for a week. I hadn't expected her to re-instate our mate's bond so soon, though I wasn't complaining.

While we floated in the beautiful serenity, our minds, bodies and souls still entangled, I understood why she took the leap.

She was fighting for her wolf.

Based on their brief interaction, this was a step in the right direction.

As she came out of the blissful haze, she praised, "That was amazing."

I couldn't help it, I chuckled. "Yes. It was my seductress."

"You think I'm a seductress now," she teased, booping my nose. "Just wait until ..." Her voice trailed off when she reached for her wolf and found the yawning void still there. The tinge of sadness swirled on the tails of her disappointment.

"Baby?" I brushed the backs of my fingers across her cheek, trying not to sound upset by this emotion swirling through her.

"I don't mean to put a damper on the mood," she whispered, rolling off me. An instant emptiness and longing crashing through my chest with the sudden distance.

At the edge of the bed, she paused. With shoulders slouched, head buried in her hands, silent sobs wracking her body, she looked so forlorn. Defeated. "What if I can't re-connect with her? I've never been so disconnected from her. I'm so afraid," she admitted on a broken whisper. "I don't know what the long-term effects are if I cannot stay connected with her. Will I lose my ability to shift? Will I remain forever unstable?" Inky tendrils of doubt and fear were suffocating her.

"Hey, hey, baby," I soothed, instantly beside her, pulling her into the warmth of my side. "Look at me." When she did, I continued. "We've only just started repairing all the damage Silas caused. Give it time. If, after this first month, you haven't been able to successfully reconnect with your wolf, we can seek help from the healer, Raphael."

"What if he can't heal me either?"

"Then we will figure out a new normal," I stated strongly, forcing my own trepidation to stay locked deep within myself. "Even if your bond with your wolf stays broken, it doesn't mean you are any less because of it."

Those gorgeous sage eyes blinked up at me, glistening with tears, my words sinking deeply into her shattered heart. Nodding, she took several deep breaths, knowing I would help her along every step of this new journey.

"We should probably see Caden, baby." As much as I just wanted to fall back into bed with her and waste the remaining day away, we couldn't.

***

Jadea

After freshening up and pulling on clothes, we ventured out into the house and found Caden in the living room, standing stoically before the large window.

Black sweats hung from his hips, a loose tee covering his torso. His brown hair was damp, as if he'd taken a shower. His muscled arms crossed in front of him while he stared out into the dusk-colored scenery.

Taking a deep breath, I stepped further into the room and knelt a few feet behind him. Assuming the position of the submissive. Behind me, I felt Adam move into a corner of the room, to be a silent spectator.

An uncomfortable silence settled over us. While I hated the silent treatment, I knew better than to speak first. This was part of my punishment: sitting in silence, sitting with what I had done.

"You have something to say, kitten."

Finally.

"Sir, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" he growled, slowly turning on his heel to stare icily down at me. "Be specific, kitten."

I winced. "I am sorry for keeping secrets. For breaking your trust and Adam's. For forcing you and him into a predicament neither of you asked for due to my inability to admit my ... weakness." The last word tasted so bitter on my tongue.

Caden stepped closer. Stubbornly, I kept my gaze cast down. Gentle fingers rested on the top of my head. "You are forgiven, kitten," he whispered, emotion bleeding into his tone.

A weight lifted off my chest, knowing he wouldn't have given his forgiveness if he felt it hadn't been earned. "Sir, what will be my punishment?" I knew there would be something. This was too big an offense not to illicit something.

"So eager to please." The smirk wasn't lost on me. "Writing assignments for the full two weeks I am here." My nose scrunched at this. "A prompt a day. And, if you do not finish them on time, it will be silent cleaning duties."

A soft growl escaped. These two tasks were my least favorite punishments. "I accept, sir." Regardless, I knew all of these would be beneficial.

"Now, be a good girl, kitten," he purred, hooking my chin to tip my head back severely, his face looming above mine. "Turn around, sit pretty and stay right here while Adam and I discuss how this dynamic will work for the next two weeks." I bared my teeth just before he abruptly let go.

Repositioning myself, I did as instructed. From the corners of my eyes I watched them settle onto the couch.

"Adam, will you please tell me about the dynamic you've set up with her?" Caden opened.

Adam explained everything we implemented and tried so far. Things that worked. The failures. How he ran the scenes.

"And what about the dynamic before?"

Once Adam finished, Caden's gaze turned to me. I squirmed under his heavy gaze. "Kitten. Now that your mate's bond has been... Re-established, are you comfortable resuming s****l punishments?"

I mulled over his question, then nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Here is what I think, Adam," he turned back to my mate. "You should remain in charge of the scenes when unpacking her time with Silas and trying to re-connect with her memories. You have had great success with her in that regard." His compliment made Adam feel proud. I couldn't help but smile, knowing he wasn't the most confident when it came to his Dom abilities. Though, he rarely showed such insecurities. "I will run the scenes when she needs to scratch that self-harm itch. During those scenes, I will teach you how to handle certain tools safely, how to monitor your sub, and so on, so you can continue those scenes after I am no longer needed.

"Having been able to process everything," Caden continued. "I think we need to schedule a self-harm scene everyday for the duration of my stay. I--"

"No. I will not allow it." Adam growled.

"Let me explain, please." Caden's calm met Adam's resistance. "It is a lot, and it will be taxing on her mind and body. However, she needs time to be conditioned to the song. The scenes will not be nearly as intense as this first one. Unless she specifically requests it before or during the scene. This is an important tool to build for her. This groundwork, while uncomfortable, is necessary."

"I accept, sir," I interrupted.

"Kitten." The warning curled through my veins. "Interrupt me again..."

The unfinished threat wasn't lost on me. I knew the endless methods Caden perfected for punishments.

"You will be able to speak soon, kitten. For now, let the adults talk."

I bared my teeth at his jab. Turd.

Smirking, he turned back to Adam. "I will agree to it, as long as we assess her daily, to verify she is okay and is in a mental state to withstand the scene."

"Of course," Caden agreed.

They spoke of their soft and hard limits. Caden roped me into this discussion as well, seeing as my limits had changed.

"Now that's out of the way, let's go over what happened earlier. Kitten, why don't you come sit between us?" Once I was settled between them, he rested a gentle hand on my thigh, squeezing ever so slightly. "That was an intense scene earlier. Are you okay?"