MONIFE

Things unsaid

MONIFE

CHAPTER ELEVEN

The rhythm of our days began to shift.

Dayo came by more often now. Twice a week, then three. Always with something small for Ayomide. A new rattle. A fresh pack of wipes. A children’s CD he claimed was Ayomide’s “intellectual starter pack.”

He stayed on his side of the line, never pushing too much. And I respected that. In a strange way, we’d begun learning how to co-exist. Not as lovers, not yet as co-parents, just two people tied to a child, trying not to mess up his world.

One afternoon, I came out of the house to find him on the porch, cradling Ayomide and humming softly. It stopped me in my tracks.

“You sing?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Only to impress small people,” he grinned. “And maybe one big person too.”

I rolled my eyes but didn’t leave.

Instead, I sat beside him.

“How did your mother take it?” I asked. “When you told her about Ayomide.”

His smile faltered a bit. “She… wasn’t shocked. Somehow, she already knew.”

I frowned. “What do you mean?”

He hesitated, then looked away. “After… what happened that night, she saw the changes in me. The guilt. The silence. She asked questions. I never confirmed it, but mothers know.”

I stayed quiet.

“She begged me to find you. To be a man about it. But I was a coward.”

I swallowed hard, unsure what hurt more. His honesty or the delay in it.

“You could’ve come sooner,” I said, my voice flat.

“I know.”

“You could’ve helped.”

“I know.”

We sat in silence, Ayomide asleep between us. The air held too much weight. I looked at him again, this time differently.

“What about you?” I asked quietly. “While I was carrying everything…what were you doing?”

He didn’t answer immediately.

Then he exhaled slowly.

“I tried to pretend it didn’t happen,” he said. “I went back to school. Finished my exams. My friends moved on like nothing happened…and I followed them “

I said nothing.

“But it didn’t leave me,” he continued. “I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw you. That night…the way you looked. And I knew I had done something terrible.”

His voice dropped.

“I got into University. Business Administration. But I wasn’t really there. I was just existing. My mum noticed. She kept asking questions. That’s when everything started catching up with me.”

He glanced at Ayomide.

“While you were fighting to survive…I was running from myself.

Silence settled again.

Finally, he looked at me again.

“Monife… I want to be in his life. For real. Not just with rattles and stories. I want to be present. Active. Accountable. And if you’ll let me… I want to be in yours too.”

My heart stumbled over itself.

I wasn’t ready for that. Not now.

But I looked at Ayomide. His tiny chest rising and falling in sleep. His peaceful face.

And I knew this wasn’t about me. It was about building something better for him.

So I said, “We’ll take it one step at a time.”

Dayo nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“One step,” he repeated.

That night, I wrote in my journal for the first time in months.

Healing isn’t fast. It isn’t loud. Sometimes, it walks beside you quietly, disguised as growth you didn’t ask for. But when you look back, you realize… you’re no longer bleeding. You’re building.

To Be Continued…