The Essence of Eternity - Awaken

Chapter IX - Elijah

All this happened so quickly! I cannot feel my legs. I am shivering. I sit on the bench so I don’t fall down and I try to catch my breath. What was that thing that protected me? Was it Dubhghall in the mist? I can really use a drink now! I get up and go into the house where I pour some vodka in a glass -I think my dad would consider this a triple! I open the fridge to find juice of whatever type to poor in my drink. Luckily, I see my dad bought some cherry juice for me. I love him so much! I start gulping down the sweet drink and as the alcohol travels through my blood, I soon feel better. I need to calm down. I was preparing for a nice relaxed night with Dubhghall and I was planning on possibly being intimate with him... But all I can think about now is Kellan. What just happened with him? What is he turning to? I am still in the house but I feel Dubhghall appear at the gazebo. I run out to find him sitting there, dazzling and sexy, as always. He stands immediately and wraps me in his arms and I start crying. I feel so safe there and all my defenses are down.

"Don’t cry Tita, please," he says. "I am here for you. I will protect you."

"It was you in the mist earlier, wasn’t it?"

"Yes, it was."

"But you did not appear, why?"

"I was afraid I could kill him…"

"He was very strong, Dubhghall."

"Yes he was, but I am stronger than you can imagine."

"What happened to Kellan? He has fangs!"

"Yes, I saw that…"

He looks a bit dazzled as well. I pull from his embrace and we both sit in the gazebo, Dubhghall holding my hands in his. "Is he also an immortal? A vampire?"

Dubhghall shakes his head, "Not yet."

"What do you mean, not yet?" I am confused. "Will he become a vampire?"

"Most probably yes, unless she decides he is of no use to her…but I am thinking she won’t leave him alone. He affects you and she lusts for him."

"You mean Alicia?"

"We do not speak their names," Dubhghall warns me. "They can hear us…"

"Aisha also told me that. Who are they?"

"Vampires," he says. "Created immortals."

"So she was also created?"

"She has immortal blood in her family but she was not strong enough to complete the change, so yes, her immortality was created."

"And she is trying to change Kellan as well?" I am very worried now!

"She is not only trying. His change has already started my queen. You saw his fangs. The only way it will not be completed is if she decides to kill him first."

"Oh my God!" My poor Kellan!

Dubhghall touches my face reassuringly. "Don’t worry Tita. He is not going to die. He is too important to you, which makes him too precious to her!"

"What do you mean?"

“She wants you out of the way. She and others…Kellan is the only connection they have to you."

This doesn’t sound good! "Nice…so how many people want me dead?" I ask.

"People?" Dubhghall smiles. "None!"

I really don’t appreciate a joke right now and I give him a light shove with my elbow. "Immortals then," I say. "Vampires or whatever the hell they are."

He becomes serious again. "Remember what Aisha told you? You are the one to lead by peace…Well, not everyone wants this peace. There are immortals who want war. They believe they were deceived and driven underground unjustly.  They feel their time is coming to rule!"

"How do you know she is one of them?"

"I don’t, but it’s a pretty good guess."

"So what do I do?"

"For now, you stay alive!"

"You say that like it’s easy!" I complain.

He laughs. "It is pretty easy, trust me! You are stronger than you think. You have powers you are not aware of yet."

"Well, then, it’s time I became aware, don’t you think?"

"Your wish is my command. So what do you want to know?"

"Well, for starters, why you do not appear in the day?"

"I do, I just have a different form then."

"Why?"

"Well, think about it. What do you prefer day or night?"

"Hmm…lately, I would say night! My eyes have started annoying me from time to time in the day, but it’s not really hurting me."

"Well, for you it’s a bit different. You have elements from various fairy breeds, even from sun fairies. For me, as the centuries passed while I was living underground daylight became more and more troublesome. It’s not that I would get burnt as people naively think - but, again, if I can avoid it, why suffer it?"

"Is it the same for vampires?"

"No, not at all. Actually they can walk the day better than us. They were mortals before and they keep some attributes from their humanity. They never lived underground. They just prefer to avoid the sun."

"Do they need to drink from humans only?"

"No, as long as it is blood it will suffice. However, they do need to drink immortal or vampire blood to complete the change. And of course, human blood is better than animal’s...but fairies’ blood is like a drug to them. It is extremely rare and unique and intoxicating."

"Is that why he tried to bite me?"

"I don’t think so. He is not a complete vampire yet. I don’t believe he really knows what he is doing. He is only a subordinate for the moment. He acts upon his instincts."

"What do you mean?"

"She drinks from him and uses him, I am guessing mainly for s*x. In order to start the change she has also fed him blood, her own, I imagine."

She uses Kellan for s*x. I really did not like the image in my head. "Mpliax!"

Dubhghall smiles."What was that sound?"

"Disgusting…in Greek! Ewwww." He laughs really loudly now and I am getting more comfortable.

"So how long does it take to fully change?"

"It’s different for each creature. For you, I suppose the change will depend on your willingness to act upon it. For him… maybe a week, if she feeds him every day. More if she is torturing him by letting him starve." Dubhghall shrugs.

I am horrified. "You mean starve for blood?"

"Yes, bloodlust is the biggest torture…'' he nods seriously. All this is so unreal to me. Like reading a fantasy book.

"I see…So, once Kellan changes, he will be evil?"

"Not necessarily. Vampires can be pure and kind. For him I am not so sure though." he says sadly. "Kellan has a lot of anger and disappointment to handle."

How awful! "Then it’s my fault I guess."

"No it’s not! Why would you think so?"

My heart is aching for Kellan! My best friend! "If it wasn’t for me, this wouldn’t be happening!"

Dubhghall puts his arms around me to comfort me. "You do not know this. She could still have chosen him…"

"I must do something," I cry and stand up, wringing my hands. "What can I do?"

"For him? Nothing. You must stay away from him…" Dubhghall replies seriously and unsympathetically.

"I cannot do that Dubhghall…"

"YOU CAN AND YOU WILL!" he shouts.

"Don’t yell at me!" I shout back. "He is my friend!"

"Sorry, I am so sorry, but he is just too dangerous."

I am filled with determination. "If he bites me, will I change as well?" I demand.

"To a vampire? No!"

"Will I die?"

"No, not from a bite; your magic is stronger than his…" He hesitates.

"Then what? Dubhghall, what will happen?"

He answers with a warning tone, "You may like it!"

Not what I expected to hear. "No, that cannot happen… Can it?"

"I do not know. I have never had such experience. But their bite is usually pleasant for their victims, at least for mortals." Dubhghall takes both of my hands in his. "You must understand me Tita, as long as you are mine it hurts me even to think about you with somebody else. You cannot do this to me!"

I am trying to pacify him. "Dubhghall, there is no one else. You are the only one for me. Can you please accept that?" He is skeptical so I figure the best way to reassure him is to show him. I pull him into my arms and start kissing him. Even with all this chaos going on, I cannot do anything but focus all my energy on that kiss. It is so wonderful…so magical. I am sure he can read my mind so I leave my senses free and without even trying, I pass my energy to him, as I did before with the flower, only now it’s easier, more natural. I see in the dark that there is a faint light coming out from my body, entering his. He shivers and moans and I can feel his ecstasy.

He whispers really closely to my ear, "Oh! My dear love, how can you do that? I have never felt anything like that before."

Did he just call me, his love? Then it hits me. I have never asked about his past. I thought he would have had other women, mortal or immortal. He is so gorgeous and sexy and he told me he was a strong and dreadful warrior, so I supposed he was popular…

He breaks the kiss and laughs out loud, "I cannot believe you are thinking about this right now. I am telling you that I have never in my existence felt this way before and instead of being content and happy you are worried that I had other women."

I am a bit embarrassed but cannot help it. I have only entered this love game recently, so it kind of is a big deal for me.

"Well, did you?" I know it is stupid to ask but I am a bit jealous here.

"Yes, I had other women; mortals and immortals. It was a really long time ago and mating was more of a matter of survival and physical need."

"What does that mean?"

"Strong warriors were expected to impregnate mortal women, to expand the races."

"Oh!" I say with some surprise. It sounds so… animal that way!

"It sounds worse than it actually was," he smiles. "I am sorry! I will tell you that I have not been with anyone else since you walked the earth."

"For eighteen years?"

"I could wait as many more for you, if I had to…"

I like his answer and I move in to kiss him again but he stops me and tells me that my dad is coming back. I wonder what time it is and check my watch to see that it is almost one in the morning! Oh s**t! I will be sleepy tomorrow again.

Dubhghall starts to leave but first he asks me when he can take me to the lake to meet another fairy. I suddenly remember that I forgot to tell him about Tirinda...Well, that will have to wait until tomorrow.

Dubhghall tells me that we can meet at seven o’ clock under our tree. I agree. He gives me another kiss with the promise that tomorrow is our day. I don’t know what he has in mind, but I know what I have in mind and I am sure he knows that; my thoughts are really loud in my head! He leaves me with a smile.

I need to find an excuse for my dad, in case I don’t come back for the night. I really don’t want to come home for the night!

I go straight to my bed to sleep, thinking that tomorrow I can take the diary with me to work. Mark usually leaves me alone for a long time and if there are no customers I can continue reading it. Besides, I need to return it to Aisha at some point. And also tell her everything that happened!

*****

I wake up around half past eight and realize I am not that sleepy as yesterday morning. That’s a good start. I go downstairs, pour some coffee in a cup and grab a cereal bar. My dad joins me.

"Hello Dad, good morning."

"Morning sweetie. How are you?"

"I am fine." I need to tell him about tonight, so I make up an excuse! "This afternoon I’m going to travel to Edinburgh. I will take the train to Dublin and grab the first flight out. Kellan might be coming with me, I don’t know yet."

"Why?" I hate lying to him, but I need an excuse to stay out all night. It’s good it’s my dad, my mum would never fall for it.

"I need to submit some papers to the Uni. I work again on Monday so I need to go tonight. The administration desk is open Saturday until lunch time."

"I could drive you to Dublin," Dad offers.

"No, it’s Friday and you work, don’t worry. I will take the train and I’ll give you a call when I get there. I am eighteen now, remember?"

"I remember," he says with a smile and adds. "Do you need any money? If you change your mind about the ride just let me know."

I really love living with my dad. My mum would have asked me a hundred questions before I would be off the hook.

"No money needed, thanks, Dad! Got to go…Don’t want to be late for work!" I give him a sweet kiss, grab my coat and my backpack and I am gone.

I arrive at the shop to find Mark already in his jacket. He informs me that he is planning to run some errands outside the shop today. He wants to pay bills but he promises to be back by three for me to leave. When he is gone and I am all alone in the shop, I take out the diary and start reading from where I had left it the other night.

July 19th, 1853

Dear Diary,

Today at school they spoke to us about how to protect ourselves from the cold ones. This is what they call them… HIM! He does not feel cold at all to me. They said we should wear a cross and carry same garlic. Everyone is upset because another girl was found dead two days ago. No blood left in her veins. But he loves me! He would never hurt me. He made me well when I was really sick! I need to find him and ask him. I don’t care if he killed her but I am ashamed to admit it that I am jealous. I don’t want him to drink from anyone else! Oh my God! What is wrong with me?

Mary Anna

*****

July 21st, 1853

Dear Diary,

I asked him about the dead girl. He said there is no one else and my distrust of him is unfounded. He said that I should never think of such things - he is not like the others. He wants me to leave with him. He said he wants me to be his woman! Can you believe this my beloved diary? He said he cannot marry me but we will have one another for eternity! He is so romantic! And then he kissed me again with all the passion and love and fury all his kisses carry. He started unbuttoning my bodice but I told him I had to leave because my father would be home soon. He did not talk but kept kissing my neck…and I felt the need to be bitten! I begged him to bite me and drink from me and as he did, he inclined his head and pushed my lips to his neck. I was kissing him and suddenly he used his fingernail and made a small cut in his own heck and I knew he meant for me to lick his blood. I hesitated at first. Once I tasted the first drops of blood, I felt like ripping his skin apart! I put my teeth deep in his neck and bit him hard. It was unique and wonderful feeling…better than making love! When I started, I could not stop. I finally stopped only out of fear of hurting him but he kissed me again on my bloodied lips and told me he loved me. I will leave with him. I could never marry anyone else!

Mary Anna

I understand now why Aisha gave me this diary. She wanted me to understand what is happening with Kellan. I was wrong to assume at the beginning that the strange man in this diary could have been Dubhghall. My Dubhghall is not drinking blood…I hope! One more thing I need to ask him…I get back to reading, as I am really curious about what happens next.

July 23rd, 1853

Dear Diary,

I must be ill again. I slept till very late yesterday and I missed school. Today I am not feeling any better. My entire body is in pain. My eyes are irritating me and I am really thirsty but water is not helping me. I feel like screaming all the time. I am tired. I can’t write more now.

Mary Anna

*****

July 24th, 1853

Dear Diary,

I am in pain. My mother fears that I may have the flu that has been killing people lately. She asked a doctor to visit me, but he said it is not the flu and there is nothing to be done for my condition. I am left alone to suffer. I call for him mentally all the time. Why has he abandoned me in my time of greatest need? I hope I see him once more before I die!

Mary Anna

*****

July 26th, 1853

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was the worst day of my life. I really thought I was dying and I was crying, not from fear of dying, but because I miss him so much. I want him to kiss me, and make love to me, but most of all I want him to drink from me. And I want to drink from him! I saw a squirrel standing outside my window and I stood up and caught it. I moved so fast I got dizzy but then I sank my teeth inside the squirrel and I drank its blood. I felt better afterwards. Not really good, but better. The pain was reduced. What is happening to me? Am I becoming a cold one? What I did was so disgusting…

Mary Anna

If this is how Kellan feels, it is really cruel and awful. I can’t help but feeling really sorry for my best friend. I understand that it is not his fault at all and I am furious with Alicia. I visualize her all beautiful and sexy drinking Kellan's blood as I relive the dream I saw in Kellan's head while he was sleeping.

Involuntarily I feel all my energy and anger focusing on her. I want to hurt her and it’s like a big bulk of strength is leaving my body. I have a mental picture of the bakery store; I see her behind the cashier desk scared hiding as all groceries have flown from the shelves and are whirling around the shop. I see her looking at me now. She knows it’s me. She is wondering how the hell I can do this. I realize what a mistake I have made! Until now she hadn’t known how strong I really am. Now she knows. I hear her clearly telling me, 'The game is on!' The vision is lost now. I am smiling although I know that what I did was totally stupid and careless. Still…it felt good! The game is certainly on.

I go back to reading my book as I really want to see what happens with Mary Anna…

July 27th, 1853

Dear Diary,

I am not feeling better today but I have decided that I must go find him. I do not care how much it will hurt to go out and walk. I will find the strength to go to him…I will leave once everybody is asleep.

Mary Anna

*****

July 28th, 1853

Dear Diary,

Before I could set out last night to look for him, he entered my room from the window. I wanted to shout at him for leaving me to suffer for so many days. I had missed him so much. In a flash he jerked my covers away and he was lying on top of me. It felt so good to have him close to me again! He kissed me and it was incredible. I did not believe how much better I felt only by having him close to me. I asked him if I was dying and he told me that would be my choice. He asked if I had thought of his proposal. I told him I had thought his proposal had been withdrawn due to my sickness. Who would want a dying woman?

He told me I am not sick. I am merely changing and it will be my choice if I decide to embrace it and follow him or decline it. He said that if I do not follow him, I will not be able to limit myself to only good deeds. He said that instead of letting me be one of the creatures that hurt others he would kill me himself. He said I would not feel any pain, only pleasure; ecstasy even!

I was truly shocked with his words. Could I really become somebody that would kill another person? I suppose that I could. I told him that of course I will follow him, if he still wants me. He told me he wants me more than he has ever wanted anyone in his long life and he started kissing me again. It felt really good and comfortable there on the bed and I did not care that my parents were sleeping in the next room. I am his now. I decided that this is my man. I started unbuttoning my night gown and when I finally cast it away and stood before him nude he looked at me with such adoration and lust that I could not help but start kissing him all over his body and undressing him. He got inside me again and it was nothing like the first time he did it. I was longing for him this time. I could not stop but scratching his back and biting him everywhere and whispering to him to move faster. And he did.

I was thinking that I am so lucky to find this wonderful partner, this great lover for the rest of my life. I will be the best wife ever. I will do whatever he wants me to do, as long as he keeps doing this to me. Then he whispered in my ear: 'I will be with you for all eternity' and then he bit me just above my breast again. This is my favorite place as well and I bent over and bit him on the neck. And we kept making love and drinking each other’s blood for a really long time until rapture came! And then I fell asleep.

I woke up this morning alone and naked and as I hurried to get dressed I saw two small dots left on my breast proving that last night was real. Otherwise, I could think that all this was just a beautiful, magical hallucination!

I am feeling really good now. Strong and ready. My eyes are itching me still but it doesn’t bother me. My mother is amazed at my improvement. I guess she expected I would really die.

What do I do now? When will we leave?

I will miss my mother but I am looking forward to start my new life with him!

Mary Anna

*****

July 30th, 1853

Dear Diary,

Two days have passed without seeing him but I am not content. I went out in the woods for a walk and I found a deer. I thought I would never be fast enough catch it but as I felt the urge to hunt it down my legs moved faster than my thoughts and I had it in my clutches before I could realized it. I am becoming really fast and strong. I broke its neck and sank my teeth in it and drank till the last drop. It was so resuscitative. It was not as tasteful and magical as his blood, but it was fulfilling.

I need to continue feeding myself and keep my secret from my parents until he comes back for me.

Mary Anna

Oh my God! She knew she had become a vampire; an immortal. This is what Dubhghall said about being created and about the bloodlust. I guess the days she felt sick, was because of the lack of blood. The time is already two-thirty and I am expecting Mark to be back any time but I cannot stop reading now. I browse the diary forward.

August 5th, 1853

Dear Diary,

Last night he finally visited me again. All these days, I subsided on animal blood and it was adequate but when he entered my room and I smelled his blood I was instantly upon him. We undressed quickly and noiselessly. It was a need to feel each other and as he was inside me, I bit him first this time. My teeth have changed and they are really sharp and pointy now. I can sink them in the flesh easily. It felt even better than before and he told me so himself. He did not bite me and I thought that was strange. I asked if he doesn’t want my blood anymore. He said he had fed earlier because he did not want to feed from me anymore. I am his lady now. I was confused as I want to bite him and drink him still. Will he think it’s wrong? He left very quickly but not before he told me to go to the town to a specific shop and find a lady. He said I should give whatever is most precious for me to her and she will guard it for me in the future.

When I think about what it most precious to me I think about you, dear diary. You brought me luck and you keep in your pages our love’s story. I am so sorry, dear diary, that I am giving you away, but if anyone finds you, they may come after us and I cannot risk it. I love you so much. I will also give her a diamond ring my father gave me. It was his mother’s and it’s so beautiful, I cannot leave it behind. I will search for the shop tomorrow and then take you there the next night after I speak to you one last time. I love you, diary…

Mary Anna