The Essence of Eternity - Awaken

Chapter VI - Revelations - the decision

I wake up in the morning to find the book still in my hands. I close it and put it in my backpack. I am planning to visit the store again today to clarify the origin of it. I really want to read it all but I need to know if it is authentic first. I cannot go on speculating, I think I will go mad soon.

I get dressed and go down in the kitchen, where I can hear my dad tucking various groceries in the fridge and the kitchen cupboards. He must have just come back from the shop, so I help him out and I also turn on the coffee pot to prepare some coffee. I have wanted to talk to him since yesterday but we have not been alone until now.

''Hey Dad, how are you today?''

''I am fine honey. How are you?''

''Ok I guess. I wanted to ask you something.''

''Shoot!''

"Well, what would you think if I changed my flights and extended my stay for a while? I don’t have any obligations back home until I go to the Uni and I was thinking I could get a part time job in the city and spend some time with you, if you want me to stay of course. I don’t want to be a burden."

 He smiles at me and looks really pleased.

"You may stay here for the rest of your life if you want! I could not be happier to have you…"

"Well I can stay until the summer is over and then we see…"

"And you do not need to work you know…"

"I know Dad, but I had a part time job in Greece before Christmas and I enjoy having my own money. Plus I need something productive to do with my time while you are at work. If I stay at the pub all day, I will become an alcoholic!"

For a moment he looks really scared and worried and I can’t help but laugh at how some Greek jokes don’t sound equally funny in English! We spend some time cleaning up and putting everything in position. My dad's kitchen is excellent. The beautiful dark wood cupboards are huge so we don't have to squeeze things to fit as in my house back in Greece, and all the appliances seem like they escaped from a house and garden magazine. After we finish, I find an excuse and leave to go to town. I decide to skip breakfast, as I am quite anxious about both the things I am planning to do today. I need to find Aisha and ask her about the origin of this diary and I really do need to find something to do with my free time.

When I get to O' Maley's I see no sign of life inside. I can’t help but worrying about Aisha and Eodan. I am hoping nothing bad happened to them. There is not much I can do by standing there wondering, so I decide to move to the second task on my list and revisit the shop later to check on them.

On my way to the newsagent to buy a paper with job ads I see a handwritten piece of paper on a window of a music store seeking for an employee. Awesome luck! I enter the store to find the owner sitting behind the desk, reading a book. The shop is really small but it has shelves all around the walls, which holds thousands of CDs and vinyl albums. The walls are painted a light green color and the shelves are black; the result is actually really nice. The lighting is a bit faint but the owner seems like an ok guy. He is not very tall, rather odd for an Irish guy, but he has the light brown hair and the blues eyes I see a lot around here. He is also quite pale. Some kind of British Rock is playing loudly and I enjoy the tempo. I like the environment in here. I get a good feeling and the shop owner is really polite when he speaks. He introduces himself to me as Mark and explains that there is no specific schedule. He needs an employee for four or five hours per day and the times are flexible. That is fine with me as I have nothing else to do all day. Once he tells me he is paying the basic salary I accept immediately. I will be starting tomorrow at noon to get acquainted with the job. I thank him for giving me the opportunity and leave the music store. That was easy; too easy, I guess!

On my way back I pass by O' Maley's again but the shop is still closed. What the heck is going on here?

I go back to the pub with only part of my mission accomplished, but I am happy. I will be staying here longer, and I have a new job. Suddenly I am thinking about Kellan; wondering when he is supposed to go back to Edinburgh. Doesn’t he have a job and some classes to attend?

That seems like the easy part, since now I have to tell me mum. I need to call her and update her with the news. I hope she will be fine with the change of plans. Tomorrow…I will do it first thing tomorrow morning. Besides, I need to speak with my dad about this family roots issue…So many things, so little time!

I have dinner with my dad and then I go back home to unpack all my stuff! I will be staying here for a while, so what is the point of having everything inside my suitcase? I need to ask my mum to send, or even better yet, bring me, some clothes and maybe stay for a weekend; that would be an excellent excuse for her. I had packed for only a few days and soon I will have to do some laundry. I hate laundry! I do love clean tidy closets, so I put on some music and I get down to business. I clean the old unused closet and I start hanging my tops and jeans inside. I use a drawer to put all my underwear and another one for my socks. I am a freak when it comes to separating and tidying my stuff, so I spend quite some time doing that.

I am really absorbed in the task when I suddenly feel strange. Dubhghall is somewhere close to me. I turn around to see him standing outside the window. Not flying or floating, just standing there motionless with his feet nowhere near the ground…How the hell is he doing that? He makes a head movement for me to open the window and let him in. He is not happy. He is annoyed and angry and edgy, so I don’t make any romantic move. I start apologizing, without knowing what I am apologizing about, but he interrupts me.

"I am not annoyed because you let Kellan kiss you, or because you slept in his arms, or because you spend time with him. I see how strong your connection is."

I did all of those things but they sound much worse now that he is listing them. If he is not angry about any of that, then what? I stay there speechless waiting for him to explain.

"I am annoyed because you don’t seem to realize that this is not a game. This is your life. And you are my life. You allow yourself to be vulnerable and you put other people in danger.”

"Who did I put in danger? You?"

"I am more dangerous than any other creature I know of…you cannot harm me. But if they know that she talked to you, they can harm the lady."

I knew who he meant. "Aisha?"

"Yes, Aisha."

"Who are they?"

"How much did she tell you?"

"She told me a lot." I admit.

"Then you must have an idea who I am taking about!" His voice is very sharp. He has never spoken to me like that before.

Ι am embarrassed now and I feel tears filling my eyes but I keep them restrained. I am not going to start crying like a little girl. And suddenly I am angry. I will not tolerate this attitude. He told me to go find the lady. He told me to open up to my senses and embrace the stupid crap that is going on around me and I am sure he can feel how frustrated I am right now…I say, "I’m sorry. I did not mean to put her in danger."

"I know that. But you don’t focus on what is important. And now she knows you can feel his emotions and walk his dreams."

"Who knows that I can feel things?" I ask.

"Tell me what did you see in Kellan's dream? I felt your shock and fear but I could not see anything further."

"Nothing. Nobody…"

"Titania, this is not the time for you to hide things from me…or try to protect Kellan."

"I did not see anything and Kellan does not need my protection," I snap at him.

He turns his head suddenly as if he heard something."I must go! Be careful!"

Before I can say, "No, please don’t go, I am sorry for everything, I don’t want to hide things from you…" he is out the window and lost in the night…

How does he do that? Suddenly I hear the doorbell ringing urgently. Who the hell is it now? I go downstairs and find Kellan standing there with his finger stuck on the doorbell. I open the door and I feel a range of ugly feelings coming from him. He is extremely heated about something I cannot understand yet.

"I heard you the first time you know," I say.

"You are staying here longer?" He demands.

"Hello Kellan. I see the news travel really fast… Who told you?"

"Does it matter?" He says angrily. "And you got a job?"

"What the hell Kellan? You are following me now?"

"When did you plan to tell me? We spent the whole day together yesterday and you said nothing!"

"First of all, I do not need to tell you everything. Secondly, I planned to tell you tomorrow.  I just made up my mind today. I got this part time job only today. How the hell do you even know?"

"Alicia saw you…"

"What?"

"She saw you in town and found from Mark that you will be working for him."

"And she did not lose any time telling you…"

"She also told me you met someone!"

"What?"

"She said you met a guy and that he is the reason you are not going back to Greece."

"That’s bull.., " I say, but what the heck?

My mind is working like crazy here. What is going on? How does Alicia know all these? Is she the one Dubhghall was referring to before? Does she know what is going on with me? I saw her in the dream drinking Kellan’s blood… Is she also different? I am not aware of the full picture here; I don't want to involve Kellan in something that might be dangerous. Stupid Alicia! I really don't want to lie to Kellan, but right now I must. I will tell him everything in time."Why would she lie to me Tita?"

"Well, to get in your pants for starters; I told you what she said to me. I see how she looks at you. She wants you Kellan."

"She is not that bad. She would not hurt me on purpose by telling me lies."

That stings me but I continue. "And I would?"

"Well, have you met someone?"

"No!"

"Is this the truth?"

"Yes Kellan," I hope he can’t see how guilty I feel. "It is the truth…"

"So why are you staying in Ireland?"

"Because I don’t have anything to do in Greece. I want to spend time with my dad and here I am closer to Edinburgh and I can visit you to arrange things for September."

This seems to calm him down a bit but he still has his doubts. He is not that easy to manipulate. "You really did not meet anyone?"

"Why is this so hard to believe?"

"Because yesterday you were really unenthusiastic when I tried to kiss you. I know what you said, but the other time it felt like you enjoyed it too."

"I did. I do."

"So kiss me again…"

"I am not going to kiss you to confirm what I am saying." I know he would figure out that I am lying! 

"We have been friends for so long that you should know you can trust me…"

Before I finish he grabs me and kisses me, but this time his kiss is not soft, or gentle. It is angry and possessive and hard and a bit painful. It is like he is imposing himself on me and I don’t like it! I am also sure that Dubhghall is somewhere near getting all these feelings from me. I need to act fast if I do not want him to break the door and attack Kellan... I know he wouldn’t hurt me but I am still not sure how dangerous he can be for Kellan. He told me he was lethal, that he has taken lives!

I free myself from Kellan’s grasp and I slap him really hard!

He is shocked and tries to soothe his cheek. "What the f**k Tita?"

"Don’t swear at me!"

"Why did you slap me, and when did you become so strong? It really hurt!!!"

"That’s for not listening to me. No means no, Kellan…"

He turns his back to me and opens the door. With his back still turned he says, "You are not fair with me…"

"Fair does not mean your way only!" I shout angrier than ever and I slam the door.

I go to my room and turn the music really loud and turn off the lights. I get in my bed, but I hear something or someone outside. Enough is enough! I don’t want to see either of them again tonight. I finally fall asleep.

There is noise. I look around and I am in a place I have not been before. A really old building -not a building - a cabin in the middle of an endless field. I stand outside listening to voices. I peep into the window to see that there are people inside. I watch closer and I realize they are not people but creatures. Some of them making out; I see a very beautiful girl walking towards a guy and when he smiles I see he has fangs, but she is not worried. She is kissing him now and then he bites her neck and drinks and she is in ecstasy. Behind them I see two shorter figures, like dwarfs or gnomes. They speak to each other with their backs to me; they have tails. Somewhere in the back of the room I see Alicia on her knees in front of a man. I cannot see who he is but I am sure he is Kellan. He turns his head and does not look happy but his eyes are hazy and he is moaning now…The door opens and someone is calling my name.